Candy
by yourpenmate
Summary: "I wasn't trying to make your life worse, I was trying to make mine better...you're my heaven but I'm your hell..." If only he used Lucille to bash the sneaky little thief's head in, he wouldn't be facing such 'misfortune'. Negan/OC
1. Chapter 1

**hey everyone, i just started writing this story (because i have plenty of assessments and i'm currently procrastinating) and i thought i might as well publish it and see if anyone's going to like it. if not, then i'll probably put this project aside**

 **so if you like the story so far, please let me know by** **REVIEW** **ing and don't forget to** **FOLLOW** **:) and i shall keep writing if you are all interested**

 **Also, check out my other Negan FF if you like reading about Lucille's origin story, it's called "The Girl With Kaleidoscope Eyes"**

 **Just a heads up: it's rated M for Negan's swearing since he loves to do that in the comics and some mild adult content**

 **DISCLAIMER: I DON'T OWN NEGAN**

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The road was desolate and peaceful in an eerie sort of way. The large trees that adorned both sides of the road led to the vast, untamed woods. Behind one of the trees closest to the road, a figure waited patiently as the sound of an approaching group of vehicles disrupted the serene silence of the surroundings. Two motorcycles with loud, rumbling engines came into sight, driven by intimidating looking men. Close behind the two motorcycles was a small delivery truck and not far behind it was a group of four or more bikers that escorted the truck. The truck contained very precious items...valuable resources.

The speeding group of motorists slowed down almost instantly when coloured smoke obstructed their vision. The smoke was a deep blue colour that instantly caused the bikers to stop as well as the truck. The smoke was very thick that it hindered the motorists' ability to see around them. The two bikers that were leading the group abandoned their motorcycles and readied their weapons. Although they were very alert, the smoke made it very difficult to see. In fact, it was a struggle to even determine whether they were walking to the right direction. The right direction was towards the truck containing the precious resources.

An ear-piercing pop followed by a noisy hiss immediately alerted everybody as the armed men riding the motorcycles followed the direction where they heard the noise. They found themselves gathered next to the truck as the smoke cleared and they were able to see what caused the outburst. The passengers of the truck had also gotten out of the vehicle to investigate. They were all greeted with the sight of one of the truck's back wheels completely busted

"I felt something from the back of the truck, go check it out," the driver of the truck expressed his concern as two armed men went to open the back door of the truck. The metal door rattled as they opened it, revealing contents of the truck. Large boxes containing valuable resources were in the back of the truck. Both men counted the exact number of boxes and just as they were about to shut it and assume that the resources were safe, a small ball no bigger than a golf ball rolled out of the truck, landing on the ground with a quiet thud before engulfing the surroundings with the same blue smoke.

A figure rushed out of the truck, the smoke prevented the two men from seeing who it was. At the same time, more of the smoke bombs rolled in all directions, engulfing the area around the truck with blue smoke and preventing any of the armed men from seeing a figure slip away.

However, right on cue, the chilly wind blew. It caused the leaves of the large trees to rustle and the blue smoke was blown away. The armed men were suddenly given a much better vision of their surroundings. Just in time, one of them saw the suspect running back into the woods and without hesitation, he fired his crossbow aimed towards the suspect. From a distance, the sound of approaching vehicles informed the men that the backup they needed was just around the corner. The figure stumbled on the ground after being shot in the shoulder, the impact was more surprising than painful. Orders were yelled out and in a matter of seconds, two burly men dragged the figure back to the scene.

"Well, well," the man who fired the shot exclaimed as the reinforcements arrived at the scene just in time to help decide what to do with the suspect. "Get her bag boys and let's see what she has taken from us," he ordered as the two burly men who held her forcefully took her backpack from her.

She was sneaky and fast, that's for sure but she was no match for the thirteen men that suddenly surrounded her. Not only were they intimidating but they were heavily armed too. "She just stole some of the food from our boxes," one of the men who looked through the contents of her bag announced, recognising most of its contents. "I found what she used to pop the tyre too," he added as he pulled out a revolver with a silencer fitted to it.

"Well, well, aren't you a clever girl," laughed the man who shot her as he looked down at her scrutinisingly.

"What the fuck happened here?" demanded the man who approached the group of men that surrounded the suspect. He was the fourteenth man and just like the rest, he looked just as intimidating, if not, he was the most menacing. He held his weapon of choice in his hand, a wooden baseball bat with its end wrapped in barbed wire.

She noticed the way that the thirteen men that surrounded her suddenly seemed nervous. Some were even just as intimated as her upon the appearance of the fourteenth man. She quickly assumed that he must be the leader of the group, not the man who had shot her with an arrow.

"The sneaky bitch came out of nowhere and tried to steal from us," spoke the man who shot her before he proceeded to assure his leader that he handled the situation. Rather proudly, he pointed at her injured shoulder with his arrow still stuck in her shoulder.

"And how the fuck did this sneaky bitch snuck under your motherfucking noses?" grumbled the man with the bat as he looked down at the woman forced to kneel on the ground in front of him with an unimpressed expression on his face. He pointed the end of his bat at her, the weapon was simply centimetres away from touching her face. "Do you fucking know who you're stealing from?" he addressed his question to her.

No words came out of her mouth. "Well, given the fact that we haven't formally met, allow me to fucking introduce myself. I'm Negan and I don't fucking appreciate you attempting to steal from me."

All she did was stare blankly at his legs as he stood in front of her, her face was void of any emotion. Therefore, he had no clue whether she was afraid or intimidated. This seemed to annoy him as he reached forward and pulled the arrow from her shoulder. It made her flinch but she shut her eyes to prevent him from seeing the pain that flashed through them and shut her mouth tightly to stop any noise from escaping out. He threw the bloody arrow to the side before he circled around her while swinging his bat.

"I gotta admit that it's motherfucking hot that you have guts," he chuckled, "I always like a strong, independent, beautiful woman," he cackled, "but," he stopped in front of her again, "but you see, you don't fucking steal from me and get the fuck away with it. I take people's shit not the motherfucking way around."

She said nothing and made sure she avoided anyone's gaze. She was a lamb surrounded by wolves... a lamb about to face her execution. "Tell me since you look pretty darn prepared to fucking ambush my men, where exactly is your camp, your people?" he proceeded to question her.

She didn't say anything as he pinched the bridge of his nose. He was starting to run out of patience. "I'll fucking ask you again because I'm feeling fucking generous. Where is your motherfucking camp?" Not a sound came out of her mouth. "Fuckity fuck," he sighed dramatically, "this one's a tough nut to crack, boys, perhaps I should introduce her to Lucille."

This seemed to excite almost all of the other thirteen men around her. The man in front of her pointed his baseball bat at her once more. "This is Lucille and she is fucking _awesome_ ," he told her in a tone full of admiration towards the object he held. "If you don't fucking tell me where your camp is, I'm going to have to bash your fucking head until you're fucking dead using Lucille so why don't you make all our lives a little easier sweetheart and answer my fucking question."

For the first time, she moved her gaze upwards to look at his face. His voice matched his face. He was intimidating overall. He had a smug look on his face and an arrogant little grin that informed her that this man was very aware that he had her life under his control. "I don't have a camp," came her response, her voice was hoarse and quiet.

Her response made him laugh. "Oh yes you do," he mused. "I'm going to fucking ask you one last motherfucking time. Where is your goddamn camp?"

"I'll show you," came her response that made him smirk wider.

"Fucking finally!" he grinned as he helped her up by grabbing her by the hair. "Lead the fucking way, darling."


	2. Chapter 2

The woods were quiet and serene. It was also a dangerous place for anyone who might be unfamiliar with its harsh terrain. Trees that stood for many, many years, congregated all over the place. While it was easy to get lost in a place where the vegetation only seemed to grow thicker and wilder the deeper you wander inside it, there was another threat... a much more dangerous threat. That threat came in the form of the horrendous growling creatures with decaying bodies that bore the stench of death. Lost, they wandered the woods, starving and desperate for a meal. Most of the wild animals that once sought solitude in the woods were long gone, they were either devoured by the hungry walkers or they have fled and sought shelter someplace else.

She led the men into woods. While half of them stayed behind with the truck and the motorcycles, the rest, including the leader followed her closely. Her hands were tied behind her back like a common prisoner as they followed her closely with one of them pointing a gun to her head as a precaution. For a while, she walked quietly, leading the men deeper into the woods.

A few minutes later and she stumbled and tripped, landing face first on the ground. A few of the men laughed at her but they were quickly silenced after a quick glance from their leader. "Help the clumsy lady up, for fucks sake," Negan exclaimed.

Upon his command, the man who had been pointing his gun at her helped her up. No one anticipated nor expected it when she knocked the gun off his hands with her own head before she bolted and fled for her dear life. "Hold your fucking horses," everyone seemed shocked as Negan proceeded to laugh while they all watched the figure of the woman disappear into the thick vegetation. "She won't get far, let's not waste our precious fucking ammos on her," cockily, he claimed. "Now why don't one of you pricks radio the others."

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She had been running for several minutes when she finally realised that no one was following her. Panting heavily, she finally slowed down to look around. There was nothing. The woods looked peaceful and it was eerily quiet. She knew she ran a fair bit and had distanced herself away from the armed, intimidating men and she considered that as an advantage. Sighing to herself in great relief, she took a different direction that led her deeper into the heart of the woods.

What could be called her 'camp' soon came into view and she found herself running towards it. Under a large, ancient tree were four people waiting for her return. They had nothing, not even a tent to call the spot under the tree their camp. All they had were the things in their bags. One of them was pregnant while the other three were mere girls no older than ten years old.

"S-She's going to give birth," one of the girls told her once they saw her approach. They untied the rope that bound her hands. The girls caught sight of her bloodstained shoulder and they clearly looked panicked at the sight of her injury.

"It's fine," she assured them before turning to the pregnant girl. "How are you feeling, Emily?" she asked the pregnant girl. She was only a teenager going through her first pregnancy.

"I think my water broke when you were gone, the baby's coming, Tully," sweaty and clearly distressed, the pregnant girl declared. She lay on the ground that was littered with fallen leaves, writhing in pain.

The woman Emily referred to as Tully began to help her with the well-behaved girls. They had nothing and it was definitely not a safe place to give birth in the woods. In fact, there was nothing sanitary about it too. Sooner or later, the smell of blood or the newborn's cries would attract walkers within the perimeter. Tully had no experience whatsoever when it came to helping a pregnant girl give birth, she had only seen movies with women giving birth and that didn't help her with her current predicament.

"I guess you should start pushing now," she told Emily, perhaps the most cliché order she could give her sister. Emily tried, once, twice and several more times until her sobs grew uncontrollable.

"I'm trying," she whimpered. Tully and the girls assumed that she only found it hard because it was her first pregnancy and she was so very young. Emily was only sixteen after all.

"I know you are," softly, Tully assured her, "take your time and breath."

Emily stared up and saw the thick leaves that acted as their roof. She sighed to herself. "Do you think we're going to find a home, Tully? For the girls and for us?" she wondered out loud.

"Of course, I will make sure that I find a safe place for you, the baby and the girls even if it's the last thing I do. I promise, Emily," she assured the girl, wondering why Emily would bring up the matter now.

Emily smiled tiredly, her vision was fading and the pain she was suffering from left her feeling numb. "Why did I even ask that question, of course you will," she chuckled softly, her voice sounded fatigued and weak. Tully asked her to stop talking. "You're the best big sister, Tully. I always wish that I could be as brave as you. Take care of the girls, you're their Mom and Dad now," she continued, her words slightly surprised Tully. "Y-You have to open me up, Tully, I can't get this baby out the other way," her sudden decision surprised and terrified everyone.

"Of course you can," Tully kept her tears at bay as she looked down at her sister. "Just try again, push a few more times." Emily shook her head. "Damn it Emily! At least for once in your life put in a little more effort! Stop being so weak!" angry but terrified at the same time, she raised her voice. Emily felt the tears that slid down her cheeks from her eyes. She listened to her sister's words and pushed hard. She shrieked as a pain ripped through her, the type of pain she had never felt before. "One more, Em, push one more time, it'll be over soon, I promise," she heard Tully say. Emily had never felt so relieved to hear those words. She pushed, feeling as if she was being ripped apart. Her vision was failing and her consciousness was fading.

"If it's a boy name him after Dad and if it's a girl name her after Mom, will you do that for me, Tully?" she asked exhaustedly.

Tully could not reply. She looked at the bloody thing she held in her hands. It was meant to be her sister's firstborn but the thing was no bigger than one of Tully's hands. It was covered in a lot of blood, the little human in her hands was deformed, it didn't resemble the baby it was meant to be but the most saddening part was that it was not moving, it wasn't crying. Shakily, Tully tried to feel its heartbeat but she knew the infant's fate even before she reached over and felt nothing against her fingers as she searched for the soft flutters of its heart. She turned to her sister tearfully, unsure how to break the news to Emily but the expression on the girls' faces told her what happened to Emily even before she could see for herself.

"N-No, no, no, Emily please," she put the deceased infant down on top of its mother's discarded pants and rushed to her sister. "Damn it Emily! Wake up!" she held her sister and slapped her repeatedly, hoping it would wake her up. Then, before she knew it, she was attempting to revive her sister using the basic CPR technique she had learned back in high school but Emily never came back, she was gone.

The day was slowly fading and sooner or later, the smell of Emily and the baby's blood would attract the most frightening predators of them all. She didn't know how long she cradled her baby sister in her arms. Her body was certainly starting to get warmer instead of colder. She was transforming. Tully looked down at her sister's face. She had lost count how many walkers she'd killed to protect Emily and the girls. In fact, she even had to kill people she considered as a threat to protect them. She was a killer who can kill with no remorse and regret since the world started falling apart as long as she could keep her family alive but when it comes to hurting her sister, she can't...not even if she was no longer her sister.

Emily's breathing was slowly returning and Tully could feel her coming back. She knew she wasn't Emily anymore once she regained her consciousness but she can't bring herself to stab her sister's own head, even if it meant ending her suffering.

The girls knew that one of them had to put Emily down. Tully had always been the brave one between them all and it was about time they all step up. One of them took the discarded knife on the ground and approached Emily's deceased body. Tully didn't even move when one of them put the knife through Emily's head, finally sending her to her eternal rest. "Thank you, Jamie, I'm sorry you have to do it," quietly, Tully told the girl.

They buried Emily and her baby afterwards. Sunset was approaching fast and Tully knew that they needed to find a new place in the woods to retire for the night. Emily's blood that soiled their old spot was a simple invitation to the walkers if they stayed there longer. One of the girls pointed at Tully's bloody shoulder. She had forgotten about it during the whole couple of hours while she was grieving for her loss.

Armed simply with a rifle that she had stolen from their past ventures, Tully led the girls to the familiar direction that led them to a nearby stream. Although the water level was low, the water was clean from the last time she checked earlier in the day when she fetched some for her and the girls. "I'm sorry girls but it looks like we're having nuts for supper again," she announced, a little frustrated while she removed her bloody shirt off. They have been having chestnuts for breakfast, lunch and dinner over the past couple of days. She figured that if only she had successfully stolen some goods from the truck, they would be having something much nicer.

"It's okay," one of the girls, ten-year-old Jamie who was the oldest amongst the girls assured her adoptive mother.

The blood on her wound had clotted long ago and the girls helped her clean her shoulder covered with dried blood using a washcloth she produced by ripping apart the hem of her shirt. Sore and burning, her wound was only getting more severe. She knew that by tomorrow, she would have a bigger difficulty moving her arm. In a matter of time, the low amount of water of the stream soon turned red. Meanwhile, it was starting to get dark and the temperature was dropping fast.

She had gotten used to the serene silence of the woods that even the quietest noise would often earn her attention. Her hand slowly reached for the rifle laying just within arms reach when an arrow whizzed past her, almost catching her hand and missing her by a meagre inch or two as the youngest of the three girls screamed in shock. All of the sudden, bright lights engulfed her surroundings as flashlights were pointed directly at their direction as if they were wanted fugitives.

"I gotta admit, the past couple of hours had been fucking entertaining," spoke a familiar voice as she got up and stood in front of the girls as if she could protect them from the men that surrounded them on her own. The expression on her face made him laugh and so he did. He let out a cheerful, bellowing laughter at the sight of the defeated expression on her face. He was glad that she was clever enough to know that she cannot escape him this time. In fact, she never escaped him, he just let her play his game for a little while. She was surrounded completely and this time, they weren't afraid to use their guns on her. "I'm pretty fucking sure some of my men even cried, it's like a fucking scene from a movie."

He walked towards her, his hazardous-looking baseball bat was in his hand. She felt the girls quiver in fear behind her. "I'm not going to beg you to spare my life," proudly, she spoke, addressing him, "but I want you to leave my girls out of this. This dispute is between you and me."

"What's your name, sweetheart?" he asked with an arrogant grin on his face as she looked up at him. He was tall and very intimidating. She looked at his baseball bat in his hand and wondered whether it was truly her end. She thought about the girls and began to worry while she blamed herself for her stupidity.

When she didn't reply, he took something from the pocket of his trousers and gazed down at the small, rectangular piece of item he held in his gloved hand. "It says here that your name is Candice Tully," he spoke, reading the contents of the card. Immediately, she realised that he got a hold of her driver's license. Her driver's license along with several of her personal properties was in the bag that they seized from her earlier in the day. "Candy, can I call you, Candy?" he looked at her as if he was waiting for her approval.

She was shivering, not only because the cold temperature of the night given that she was only clad in her pants and bra but because she was shivering in fear for the girls lives more than her own. She knew she misjudged the men before her, they clearly had eyes in the forest that she didn't know of. Deciding that she was going to ignore his question, Negan smirked, admiring the brave mask she put on. "I'm going to ask you a question and I want you to answer me properly," he began, "do you or do you not have a camp?"

She shook her head and laughed, this time, surprising not only the men that surrounded her but Negan himself. How she managed to laugh in the situation that she was in, he wasn't exactly sure. "Haven't you figured out the answer for that when you were spying on us earlier? I thought you were smarter," she snorted. He nodded his head calmly and decided to say nothing about the insult she threw at him about his intellect. He decided that he was feeling extra generous today due to the sight of her half-naked body.

She looked at her girls. They looked sleepy and exhausted. "How about you, do you have a camp?" this time, she asked him the same question.

Negan grinned. "We most fucking certainly have a camp."

"And is it a boys only camp or something?" came her retort that made him grin wider. He was beginning to like her wit. At the same time, he was beginning to realise the fact that she was considering the idea of joining his group.

"Fuck no," laughed Negan. Although his excessive cussing seemed to irritate her, she said nothing about it and chose its best to let him get comfortable. "With those exceptional tits of yours, I'll let you join us," he continued, smirking at her. While she took his comment as an insult, she knew it was also her opportunity. The chance she needed to save the girls. They have no shelter and food. The girls were sleepy and fatigued.

"And do you guarantee my girls' safety?" she asked him. Negan ran his fingers through his slicked back hair as a sigh escaped his lips.

"Nothing in life is guaranteed, sweetheart so you and your girls just have to work hard to make sure nothing shitty happens to any of you," Negan replied, "but I can fucking guarantee you all that we have plenty of food and a lot of motherfucking ammos and manpower to keep our people safe. So, are you coming home with us?"

She looked at her girls and gave them a reassuring smile. She knew that they wouldn't last in the woods eating chestnuts with a depleting water supply. "Yes," she finally replied, prompting Negan to grin in delight.

"Funfuckingtastic," he exclaimed, "now put your fucking shirt on because those tits are fucking distracting me." She obeyed promptly, it was her first act of obedience towards her new leader.

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 **there you have it! i hope you all enjoyed this chapter as much as i enjoyed writing it.  
Not surprisingly (since I'm notorious at procrastinating), _I almost finished writing the whole story_ but it would also be nice to hear what you guys think so ****don't forget to drop a REVIEW and hit FOLLOW **

**I'll try to update soon but May is my busy month so I can't guarantee anything sorry in advance and thank you :)**


	3. Chapter 3

**hey guys, thanks so much for the reviews and for following this story :)**

 **here's a fresh new chapter for you guys, i hope you'll enjoy it and don't forget to let me know what you think after thanks!**

 **thanks!**

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During the whole trip to the place Negan had referred to as The Sanctuary, she and the girls were blindfolded. She sat in the backseat of a van that smelled like musk, sweat, and dirty socks with the girls sitting close to her. She knew the girls were afraid. Who wouldn't be when the men whom they had pledged their alliance to looked downright intimidating. At the same time, she knew that she had taught the girls enough. She always told them that if they don't feel brave enough, at least put on a brave face because no one would be able to tell the difference but yourself. She knew it was an impulsive decision to come with Negan and his men. While she thought she can survive in the woods with hardly any food, she knew that she can't say the same for the girls. She had three girls to look after, they were her priority and if Negan had shelter and food like he claimed, then her impulsive decision should be worth it...she hoped.

Although she could not see, she could tell that Negan was not in the vehicle where they had thrown her and the girls in. Instead, the voices from the front of the vehicle were unfamiliar. They talked very briefly about why Negan didn't bash her head in with his bat or any of the girls' for that matter. They thought it was surprising.

"He probably didn't want the kids to see, it'll be too harsh to show them something so gruesome," one of the men in the van spoke in response.

"I think he just wanted to bang her so he's keeping her alive," another added.

They spoke in low voices but she heard every single word they uttered. In the end, she concluded that Negan was not someone to mess with. It was evident that even his own men didn't understand his way of thinking and he intimidated them for that reason. Her stomach lurched as she thought about whether she made the worse decision and dragged the girls with her on the process. If their lives were ever at risk in the hands of the new group they joined, it was single-handedly her fault.

Some time later and she felt the vehicle slow down. Outside, she could hear the echoing growls and hisses of what seemed to be a large number of the undead. She began to fear that they have come across a large herd and that she would die with her hands tied up while blindfolded in the back of a stinky van but the driver eventually stepped on the gas again and the noises of the undead grew fainter and fainter. A few minutes later and the van stopped, she figured that they have arrived. She relied on her ears as she listened intently. She could hear muffled voices outside and a few minutes later, someone opened the passenger door of the van.

Someone grabbed the girl closest to the door, eight-year-old Molly. "Mommy!" she called shakily as two hands firmly grabbed her and guided her out of the van.

"It's okay baby, I'm right behind you," she called out from inside the van in an attempt to comfort the child.

A minute later and she felt a pair hands grab a hold of her bounded hands firmly as the person who held her guided her out of the vehicle. One of the person's hands wore leather gloves while the other was bare. As soon as she stepped out, she felt the chilly breeze against her face. A split second later, whoever it was who took her out of the van removed her blindfold. The first thing she saw was someone's torso donning a familiar black, leather jacket. She knew instantly who it was as she looked up and saw the smug expression on his face. Their brown eyes met and she instantly looked away, scowling and unimpressed.

He began to untie her hands as she looked around her new surroundings. It seemed that the so-called Sanctuary was an old factory that he and his group had transformed into a home. The large, old building stood in front of her. The shocking thing was that the compound was not only surrounded with chain-link fences for protection but a wall of living and growling walkers that were chained and staked also surrounded it. She realised they never encountered a large herd of the undead and it was simply the gate of the Sanctuary that was the source of the noise she heard earlier.

"Mom!" she turned her gaze to her girls as they ran up to her and quickly, she turned away from Negan to turn her attention to them.

"Come on, let's get inside, I'm fucking exhausted," Negan declared, prompting the new recruits of the group to follow him while the rest of the men followed closely behind. They were alert and cautious since they learned from earlier experience that she can be pretty darn unpredictable.

The inside of the factory looked pleasantly clean which greatly contrasted the unpleasant surroundings outside the gates. A man who guarded the door greeted Negan upon their arrival with no questions asked about the new people behind him. Negan dismissed his thugs with a simple wave of his hand, leaving her and the girls in his company. He took the stairs leading to the upper level of the compound with his bat still in his hand as she and the girls followed behind.

"This place is no five fucking star hotel," he began as he walked through an empty corridor, his footsteps were loud and heavy. He reached the end of the corridor and opened a door that let out a noisy creak before turning his gaze to the woman with three, sleepy yet cautious looking girls. He turned his gaze towards the approaching figure behind Tully and nodded.

"We took what we needed, Negan," spoke the newcomer, one of his men. The man had three familiar looking backpacks with him that he left on the ground next to Tully before he excused himself.

"Those bags now contain only your clothes and the little knick-knacks you all own. All the shit in there that would be useful to me are now mine like your weapons for example," Negan declared. He nodded towards the room and wordlessly, the woman motioned for the girls to get inside as she picked up the bags, they were much lighter than they were before. "I'll see you bright and early, sunshine, you have lots of fucking work to do to earn some fucking points to pay for your accommodation and all the shit you will need to survive here," grinned Negan as he walked past her and made his way back to the direction he had come from.

She gathered her bags and entered the room he had provided her and the girls. The room was eerily bare. Judging by the dust marks on the floor, she guessed that the room used to have stuff in it that has been removed for some time now. She assumed that the room was some sort of an office but now, it would be the room she would share with her girls. Light from the moonlit night sky crept inside the room through the large glass window, enabling them to have some natural light in the dark room given that there were no candles to help them see better.

She was relieved to see that Negan's men did not take the single sleeping mat they owned. She laid it out on the floor before searching the other bags for the blanket that she and the girls shared. She was relieved to find it also. While the girls were lying down on the mat and were kept warm by the blanket, she busied herself unpacking their bags. She placed their items in an organised manner on the floor and quickly noted the items that were missing which included the two spare guns and several knives along with a flashlight they owned, the two precious boxes of matches and all her prized smoke bombs that she acquired from ransacking a joke shop.

"Mommy," she heard Molly call her, earning her attention. She turned to look at the girls and realised that they were all still wide awake. "Is this where we're going to live from now on?" she asked.

"Yes. For a little while," she replied as she smiled reassuringly at the girls.

"I don't like this place, Mom," declared Carly.

"Me too," claimed Jamie.

"Can we go somewhere else?" Carly wondered.

She abandoned the chore she had been busy with and sat close to the girls. "I know that those men were scary but they have a good place here. We need this right now," she explained, "I promise that if you girls still feel the same in a couple of weeks, we'll leave this place and go somewhere else. Just give it a try. I'm scared and intimidated too but I want to see what this place can offer us. Who knows, this place might be the home we've been looking for." She knew that being optimistic was her only way of comforting the girls. They have gotten far with her optimism. One of the reasons why the girls trusted her was because of it. She just hoped that the Sanctuary would truly live up to its name.


	4. Chapter 4

**hey guys, thanks for the REVIEWS. I honestly love reading them and they're very motivational.**

 **I got a couple questions about the story and Tully. To answer those questions, this story takes place before Negan's encounter with Rick and his group & I'd say Tully is in her 20s & she adopted the girls (I will address this more in later chapters)**

 **Also, just a head's up. Updates might be a little delayed because my exams are coming and although I love to procrastinate, I need to pass my exams to pass the semester lol. So I apologise in advance and I hope you guys will understand**

 **Anyway, I read the comics to get inspiration for this chapter and I tried to be faithful to the comics on my portrayal of the Sanctuary. I hope you will enjoy this chapter and don't forget to let me know what you think after :)**

* * *

For the next few days that followed, she quickly learned what life was like in the Sanctuary and so did the three girls. For the first time in a very long time, the girls were not only able to have a full belly and a good night sleep but they were also able to clean themselves up and have their first cold shower in weeks. However, while it may all seem nice, the matriarch of the group still remained cautious. They may be safe from the harsh elements outside, including the threat of the unpredictable weather and the walkers but she kept herself alert given the fact that the humans inside the Sanctuary with them were just as dangerous as the dangers outside the compound.

They worked to maintain and afford their current life in the Sanctuary and to also make sure that they stay on their new leader's good side. Immediately after they became a part of Negan's group, Tully noticed the way Negan was treated by his people. They obeyed his every order without question and treated him like a king. It was almost like a cult of some sort. Both she and her girls were expected to do the same now that they were members of the group.

Despite the fact that her girls were just children, they were expected to do the chores too. It was how most people in the compound earned their points to afford to live and survive in the Sanctuary. The points a person would earn for doing jobs had the same value as money, which they would use to pay for everything from a bar of soap to a serving of food. As their guardian, she made sure that they were always together. She brought them to kitchen whenever she prepared meals and they acted as her little assistants. They followed the same process when she did other chores. The girls would always be by her side wherever she goes. No one seemed to care about this as long as the girls were working and contributing to something for the whole group. There weren't any other children in the Sanctuary. Her girls were the youngest residents of the compound. The youngest before they came were in their late teens and that's mainly because children were seen by many as a burden. That was not how she viewed her girls though.

In the Sanctuary, a type of grouping existed which she quickly learned. It was organised in a pyramid with Negan, the leader, at the very top. Under him were those associated closest to him and they were his so-called wives. His wives consisted of a number of beautiful, young women. Some of them were former lovers of Negan's henchmen. Right at the bottom of the pyramid were people like Tully and the girls, the common followers who were only a part of the group for the sake of having shelter and protection. Tully also learned that the Sanctuary was not the only place that housed Negan's people and she quickly realised that Negan not only controlled the people in the factory but many, many more. His territory expanded far beyond the Sanctuary. However, most of the information she learned so far about Negan's activities outside the Sanctuary were all very vague. One thing she was certain of was that it was almost frightening to think that such a man could be so powerful.

As one of the common followers in the Sanctuary, her duty was to make sure that Negan and his wives were provided with a comfortable life. People like her and her girls were expected to do the hard work such as the laundry, the cooking, the cleaning and all the physically demanding chores to make sure those at the upper part of the pyramid lived a nice, comfortable life. While people like her earned points, those at the top of the pyramid didn't have to.

Tully's contentment with their new life was suddenly rocked one afternoon. The girls and her haven't been in the Sanctuary for a week and although she liked to think that she learned a lot about the new people and the new place, she realised that she actually only knew half, if not, just a quarter of what the Sanctuary was about and how it was ran. While busy finishing their chores, Tully and the girls, along with the others were called to a gathering. "Negan wants all us downstairs in five minutes, hurry," informed a lady named Cara who called Tully and the girls.

She gathered her girls and followed Cara along with the others downstairs where the gathering was already underway. It seemed that the presence of every single residents of the Sanctuary was required for this so-called gathering. She and the girls stood amongst the crowd when a smug-looking Negan finally arrived from his office with his bat in hand. The room went eerily quiet as soon as everyone saw him arrive.

"Where the fuck is he?" his voice was loud and cold. One of his henchmen dragged a teenage boy from the crowd, the boy was no older than sixteen. She recognised the boy as the son of one of the women who worked in the kitchen with her nightly.

"P-please Negan, believe me, I didn't do it," the boy spoke shakily as Negan's thugs forced him to sit in the plastic chair.

"Damn fucking right you did, cunt," grumbled Negan, clearly not in his usual vivacious mood.

The next series of events that followed horrified some of the people who acted as witness. However, most were used to it and watched the event occur with a straight face. One moment the young teenager was begging Negan for forgiveness, claiming he didn't steal and that he would never do such a crime and the next, he was screaming in agony as Negan pressed a scorching cloth-iron against his face, burning his skin so badly and deforming his face horribly.

Tully felt one of her girls, Carly, leave her side as the little girl rushed away from the scene, clearly terrified by what she witnessed. Angry and horrified at the same time that the children had to witness such brutal act, she turned to follow Carly with the two other girls in tow only to be stopped by a tall scrawny, familiar looking man.

"You are staying here like everybody else," he told her. She scowled at him, not only was she disgusted by his words but she held a personal grudge against him given the fact that he was the same jerk who shot her with an arrow. Dwight, that was his name.

"Move over asshole, she is clearly scared," she pushed him out of her way with all her might, her action took him by surprise as he stumbled back.

"Don't be stubborn if you don't want to end up like that boy," hissed Dwight as he held her arm back, preventing her from leaving.

"Let go of my arm," she demanded as she aggressively tried to tear her arm free from his grasp, "don't you dare touch me, in fact, don't ever speak to me ever again…" her voice trailed off when she realised that everyone in the quiet room had turned their attention to her and Dwight, including the scowling Negan while the crying teenage boy was dragged away by two of his burly henchmen.

"You heard the fucking lady, Dwight, let her go," Negan spoke, "and as for all of you shitheads, if any of you fuckers steal from me again, you'll end up like that little cunt," he continued, addressing the entire room this time. His dark gaze found her as he spoke about the thief and she felt her body shiver knowing that it could've been her…or worse, she could've suffered a much more terrible fate.

As everyone left the gathering and went back to what they were all doing beforehand, she searched for Carly with the other two girls in tow. They found her in their room, curled up in the corner and crying uncontrollably. The maternal side of her took over as she rushed to the girl's side and apologised to her for making her witness such graphic event.

"No, no, it's not that," Carly responded as she looked up at her with her tear-stained face.

"Then why are you crying? Tell me what's wrong, honey."

Carly wiped away her tears and looked at her guiltily as the other girls asked her too what was wrong. Carly didn't say anything as she got up from the ground and made her way to the other side of the room where Tully kept their things organised neatly. The little girl picked up one of their bags and unzipped it. Nervously, she proceeded to take an object out of the bag.

"Carly, where did you get that?" horrified, Tully approached the girl who just took a small first aid box out of the bag.

"I-I stole it from the storeroom," nervously, Carly replied, clearly afraid to admit the wrongful act she committed. "I'm sorry. I know it's wrong but I saw you getting dressed the other day and your shoulder looked bad. I don't want you to die."

She found herself laughing despite how terrible the situation was. "Oh Carly, a shoulder wound is not going to kill me," she assured the girl. "Why do you think I've been doing more chores? It's because I want to earn more points to barter for some medicine so what you did was unnecessary and wrong."

Carly lowered her head in shame. "Is Mr Negan going to do the same thing he did to Oliver to me?" she asked shakily.

"Well, they're going to realise soon that they're missing one of the first aid kits," she pointed out, "we'll talk to him and you have to apologise but don't be afraid, I'll make sure he doesn't do what he did to Oliver to you, okay?"

* * *

Later that day, while Negan was in his office, he heard a soft knock on his door. By the sound of the knock, he instantly predicted that his guest was a woman. He assumed it was one of his wives as he got up from his seat and opened the door. Much to his surprise, it was the last woman he expected to be visiting him.

"Are you busy?" she looked up at him and asked. She was quite a short woman but he guessed that it contributed to her swiftness and as a result, she was able to escape from him and his men very easily once.

"No, what do you want? Came to give me a gift?" he replied, winking at her. In response, she rolled her eyes.

She turned her gaze away from him and towards someone hidden from his view. "Come on now, don't be afraid," her voice surprisingly turned much softer compared to the tone she would use on him. Negan watched as a little blonde girl emerged from where she had been hiding. He could tell very easily when somebody feared him. It was easy to tell that the trembling girl was very terrified of him but he cannot say the same for her adoptive mother who stood confidently in front of Negan.

"Carly would like to speak to you," she told him, "do you mind if we come in?" Tully was more respectful and polite than he was used to. Negan stepped aside and watched as they stepped inside. He shut the door quietly behind him and folded his arms across his chest.

"What the hell is this about?" he wondered out loud as the little girl quivered from the sound of his voice.

"Mr Negan," the girl started, her voice trembled as she looked up at him with her blue eyes shiny from the tears that were about to burst out.

"It's okay, Carly," comforted Tully as the trembling girl stepped towards Negan and handed him an object he quickly recognised as the missing first aid kit, the first aid kit that Oliver had been accused of stealing. "I'm sorry Mr Negan, I know stealing is wrong but I swear I didn't steal it, I just borrowed it because I don't want my Mom to die from her shoulder wound. I'm sorry."

Negan took the object from her hand and placed it on his desk. He sighed to himself. It seemed like he just branded the wrong person. He sat on the edge of his desk as he watched Tully comfort the frightened child. "Was that all you stole from me?" he asked, addressing the girl.

"Y-Yes, Mr Negan," Carly replied quickly.

"Well, someone needs to be punished about this," he declared as he got up from his seat and took Lucille, the bat with its end wrapped in barbed wire, resting against the desk. The girl trembled in fear as she held onto Tully, crying in fear.

"She's just a child, Negan," Tully spoke.

"What do you propose I do then, Candy?" smugly, Negan asked her, addressing her by the name he came up for her.

"I'll take her place, just don't hurt her, please," without hesitation, she replied. Negan smirked. She would do anything for her girls. She thought that she could take a hot iron better than Carly. It won't kill her, it will probably just hurt really badly. She thought about the ugly scar she'll have. Beauty was pointless in the new world anyway, she thought.

"Carly, that's your name right?" Negan turned his attention to the girl. "Candy is about to be punished because of your own stupidity. Next time you steal from me, I won't be too generous," Negan told the girl. "Why don't you go and leave the room while your Mom gets punished. Go on," he was creepily calm. The girl was hesitant to leave her adoptive mother alone. However, after being assured by Tully that everything will be alright, Carly left the room. As soon as the door closed behind her, Negan placed Lucille back to where she had been resting against the table. "You have a pretty face and it will be a fucking shame to mutilate it with a hot cloth-iron," Negan started as he sat on his desk again with her standing a few steps away from him.

She remained quiet as her eyes avoided his'. "Now how will I fucking punish you," he wondered out loud, "any suggestions?" Again, she said nothing.

Negan got up from his seat and approached her. He stopped in front of her and he reached forward. He held her chin with his thumb and index finger and forced her to look up at him. "I'm not going to fucking lie, I think you're goddamn beautiful and I still think about those motherfucking tits every fucking night so I'll spare you this time and probably for the last fucking time."

He saw a flicker of relief flash in her chocolate brown eyes. "Thank you."

He grinned at her. "You're fucking welcome, Candy."

"It's Tully," she corrected him, informing him of the nickname she was more used to being called.

Negan grinned wider. "I'll call you however the fuck I want to call you," he retorted arrogantly. He was reminding her that he was the boss who controlled everything including her.


	5. Chapter 5

**hey guys, sorry i've been gone for a while but here's another chapter for you all.**

 **i hope you will like it and don't forget to drop a REVIEW to let me know what you think :)**

* * *

Since the incident involving Carly, Tully tried her hardest to stay in Negan's good side by doing all her chores on time and making sure that her girls understood the consequence if they ever disobey. She avoided any encounter with him at all cost. However, despite her efforts, Negan seem to know exactly where to find her. While she tried very hard to avoid him, he made sure that she was within his sight at all times. It became apparent instantly that he got his eyes on her. She was new after all and he liked to make sure that the decision he made when he took her in wasn't going to haunt him in the future.

When the Sanctuary was still a factory during its glory days, one of the rooms from the ground floor served as a cafeteria for the factory workers. Now, it still served a similar purpose and functioned as a large, communal dining area. The people who would eat first other than Negan would be those under him including his henchmen and his wives and whatever was left was for the rest of the population. Every night, Tully would work in the kitchen to earn her points with three other people and her girls helping her prepare the food to serve to the group.

Tully and her girls had been living in the Sanctuary for a week and she saw everyone around her as an acquaintance and nothing more, even the people she worked with when completing her chores. She decided it was best not to get too attached to anyone and form any type of friendship, she had her girls with her and that was all she needed. Besides, she knew that she couldn't trust anyone outside her inner circle.

Meanwhile, her girls who were all friendly and polite had befriended several people, from the few young people living in the compound to some of Negan's wives. While their adoptive mother was still very cautious of their new home, the girls seemed to be settling in quite well, even Carly, despite her traumatising ordeal. One person the girls were still cautious of however was none other than Negan himself.

The dining area was busy as the first group filled the room for supper. Food in the Sanctuary was abundant and their supply came from many different groups from the area who owed them. Tully, after slaving away in the kitchen, now had the responsibility to serve people with their food. Like a school cafeteria, there was already a queue consisting of starving people holding their respective trays. Soon, the queue was moving as she and the other workers began to serve each individual with their ration for supper.

Eventually, the last person from the queue was served and Tully wiped the sweat off her brows in great relief. However, the buzzing dining area suddenly fell eerily silent when a particular, tall, intimidating individual stepped inside. Little Molly was the only one left looking after the counter when Negan arrived. Her task was to give anyone who asked for seconds another portion if they can afford it. Meanwhile, the rest of Molly's companions were back in the kitchen, now busy cleaning.

Tully, who was occupied helping Jamie and Carly clean a large pot, suddenly noticed that it had gone quiet in the cafeteria and decided to check on Molly in fear that the girl had gotten herself in trouble with one of the Saviors. As soon as she stepped out of the kitchen and found Molly talking to a particular person standing on the other side of the counter, the overprotective, maternal side of her took over.

"Molly, honey, why don't you help the others in the kitchen," Tully took over the girl's current chore and interrupted the conversation she was having with Negan.

"Okay," smiled Molly who was surprisingly more cheerful than afraid. "See you later, Mr. Negan," she turned to Negan and waved goodbye before following her adoptive mother's orders and disappearing into the kitchen.

Tully proceeded to continue the task Molly had been doing, filling Negan's tray with food. "What were you two talking about?" curiously, she wondered out loud. She worried that one of her girls were in trouble again despite Molly's unusual cheerfulness towards him.

"I told her that she was doing a damn good job," came Negan's response. She frowned at him, suspicious that he wasn't telling her everything. "Alright," chuckled Negan, "I gave her a pack of jellybeans as a fucking reward for a job well done, it wasn't poisoned, in case you were fucking wondering," he chuckled.

"You don't have to do that," she told him as she handed over his tray now filled with food, "but thank you anyway."

The grateful tone she used on him made him grin. "No, thank you," he said, "it's a fucking relief that there's finally someone around here who knows how to fucking cook. I was beginning to believe that the food they've been making before was going to be the fucking death of me," exclaimed Negan. His little compliment made the apples of her cheeks red and he was pleased to witness it.

Later that evening, Negan avoided the familiar direction he usually took to get to his room and he found himself walking towards a certain corridor. As he walked through the dark corridor quietly, he heard the sound of muffled laughter growing louder. It came from the room at the end of the corridor and the closer he got, the more he realised that the door was ajar.

"Alright, whoever eats the black jellybean will get the best spot on the mat tonight," declared one of the girls.

"Are you kidding me, the black ones are my favourite!" exclaimed another, Negan recognise the voice as Carly, the girl who had been crying in his office just a few days ago.

The other girls exclaimed their disgust as Carly ate the black jellybean. He peered through the small opening and saw the girls sitting on the floor. As their giggles filled his ears, his eyes searched for the matriarch and soon enough, he spotted her in the corner, busy replacing the bandages of her wound.

"Why don't you girls go to sleep," Tully spoke as the girls offered to help her bandage her injury but she refused, claiming that they needed to go to sleep instead. "I hope you said thank you to Negan earlier, Molly," she continued as the girls began to lie down on the mat laid out on the floor.

"I did," replied Molly, "he said it was for us because we're doing a great job," Molly continued, "he also asked me if we have a Dad," she recalled.

This made Tully promptly stop on what she was doing. "What do you mean he asked if you have a Dad?" unsure and intrigued, Tully asked.

"Well, you're our Mom," Molly started, "he wanted to know if you have a boyfriend, so he asked me if we have a Dad," she explained, giggling as she pointed out how Tully had trouble understanding it. "I think Mr. Negan has a crush on you, Mommy" Molly pointed out as the other girls giggled.

"I think Molly's right, Mr. Negan didn't punish me or you when he said he would, I think he likes you, Mom," Carly confirmed.

"He has many wives to occupy himself with so I think you girls are just imagining stuff," irritably, she reminded the girls, unable to believe that they would tease her. "I thought all of you were afraid of him, huh? He just gave you girls some sweets and all of the sudden, you all like him," Tully muttered.

"But you told us before that Mr. Negan has pretty eyes," Molly pointed out as the girls made teasing noises.

"You also said he has perfect teeth," Jamie added with a giggle.

"No, I said I want to punch him in his perfect teeth," Tully corrected her. "Finding him physically attractive doesn't mean I have a crush on him," grumbled Tully, realising that her careless words were now haunting her. "Why don't you girls go to sleep and while you're at it, dismiss this whole thing with Negan, next time, I shouldn't ever let him give you girls any candies."

Negan made his way back to his room with a grin on his face. Feeling as if he had achieved something pretty darn big. When he got to his room, he found one of his wives already there, waiting for him. "Not tonight," he told her as he unzipped his leather jacket. His declaration seem to have surprised her but she said nothing and left the room.

* * *

The following day, Tully and the others had taken advantage of the generous amount of sunlight as they busied themselves doing the laundry. Their own laundry was not their only responsibility and they were also busy washing the pile of dirty laundry owned by those at the top level of the pyramid. Although she woke up with her wounded shoulder painfully throbbing and her entire body burning from what she suspected was a fever, Tully tolerated the pain. She noticed that the wound she earned from Dwight's arrow was not getting any better, in fact, rather than healing, it seemed to be only getting worse. When she peered through the bandages early that morning, she noticed that there was an abundant amount of pus that accompanied the blood that leaked out of her wound.

"Do you want me to squeeze the water out for you, Mom?" Jamie, who had noticed Tully struggling to squeeze the shirt she had been washing offered.

"It's okay sweetheart, I got it," she assured her although the pain on her shoulder was making the task impossible. Jamie wasn't the only one convinced with her response and before Tully could even realise it, Carly and Molly had taken the shirt from her hand and did the task themselves.

"Can't you ask Mr. Negan for a day-off?" Molly asked and her little question made the other workers who overheard laugh, leaving Molly feeling sheepish.

It was noon when Negan heard a knock on his door. He looked up from the maps laid out on his desk as he told the person behind the door to come in. Dwight stepped inside. "There's a problem," Dwight informed him, "one of the new girls, she collapsed and knocked herself pretty hard."

"Candy?" Negan asked as he got up from his seat.

"The feisty bitch? Yeah her," Negan pinched the bridge of his nose and followed Dwight out of his office. Lucille was left behind, positioned against the desk.

Negan and Dwight found an unconscious figure of a woman lying at the bottom of the stairs, surrounded by three familiar girls. She looked a lot paler than she did when Negan encountered her during supper the night before. When he went to pick her up, he felt her burning temperature almost instantly.

Three frightened faces looked at him. Without their matriarch, they were clearly directionless and afraid. "Is she dead, Mr. Negan?" one of them, Carly, asked as they followed Negan. The last time the girls saw someone with a fever was when Emily's corpse was transforming into a walker.

"No, calm down kid, you're mother's going to get the help she needs but it's going to cost you all a fucking arm and a leg," Negan replied.


	6. Chapter 6

The Sanctuary did not have one of the most precious resources after food and clean water...a doctor. However, what they have was a fairly large amount of medical supplies that can be considered as equally important in the new world. Negan trudged into a room that has become the Sanctuary's infirmary with an unconscious Tully in his arms. The closest they have to a doctor was the veterinarian Patrick, a middle-aged man who looked after the infirmary and the group's medical supplies.

"What happened to her?" Negan demanded as he expectantly waited for Patrick's response. The woman now lay on the infirmary bed and one touch informed Patrick that she was burning.

"She has a fever," he told Negan.

"I fucking know that Patrick, I meant how the fuck did she get it?" Negan replied irritably. He watched as Patrick checked the unconscious woman for any other injuries and he quickly noticed the bulky bandages wrapped around her right shoulder hidden by her clothes.

"I'm going to need her shirt off to see what's going on with her right shoulder," Patrick announced as he looked at Negan for permission. Negan nodded his head in response and Patrick began to unbutton her flannel shirt. As soon as he opened up her shirt and her bra-clad torso was revealed, a strong stench welcomed Patrick and Negan. The smell only grew stronger as Patrick began unwrapping the linen bandages that were already stained with her blood to reveal her wound. The fact that she was still bleeding was a give away that her wound wasn't healing and as soon as he unwrapped the bandages, Patrick immediately saw the current condition of her injury.

"It's badly infected," Patrick declared.

"Yeah, I can fucking tell," Negan muttered irritably.

"Well, I believe that the infection caused her fever," Patrick explained, "Her wound is very bad and I will have to stitch it up because it won't heal any time soon-…"

"Get on with it, stop talking and just do your fucking job," Negan interrupted, annoyed and impatient.

Waiting outside the infirmary were the three girls who looked at Negan with a hopeful glint in their eyes when he stepped outside while Patrick treated Tully. He asked them if they wanted to watch Patrick stitched up Tully's wound and he was surprised when the girls claimed they wanted to stay by her side. Therefore, Negan ended up bringing the girls with him inside the room as Patrick was busy with the process of treating Tully's badly infected wound. The room was soon enveloped in silence as Patrick concentrated on the task at hand and everybody else looked on.

Negan glanced across him and saw three quiet girls sitting next to the bed. "So let me get this right, she adopted all of you after the shitstorm happened, right?" he began to wonder out loud. He had been itching to have that theory confirmed. Not only was Tully too young to be a mother of three girls since she looked like someone in her 20s but none of the girls resembled each other, one had blonde hair and blue eyes, the other had fiery red hair and freckled face while the oldest of the girls had straight black hair and olive skin.

"Yes, Mr. Negan," Carly, the blonde replied politely. Realising that the girls would answer any question he would throw at them, Negan continued.

"Did any of you know her before she took you all in?"

The girls exchanged looks, it was clear to them that he wanted to know things about their adoptive mother. While they were intrigued by his motives, Tully often told them that they have to be obedient and polite to their new leader to stay on his good side. "Well, Mrs. Tully, her Mom, was the school principal and we were all together when the monsters arrived," the red-haired Molly recounted.

"Where are your real parents?" he wondered out loud and he saw their faces drop when he brought up the topic.

"They never collected us from the school," Jamie the oldest, was the one who replied. Negan was surprised by this answer. He thought that they simply died. "Tully went to pick up Mrs. Tully and Emily, her sister and Mrs. Tully didn't want to leave us so they took us in."

"Emily, that's the pregnant chick, right?" he checked, they nodded their heads. "So where's Mrs. Tully now?" He was learning more from the girls than Tully would ever tell him. Negan enjoyed learning about his people, he always found it handy to conduct little background checks on them simply because it made him aware of who he's dealing with.

"Ryan killed her," came Molly's response and Negan saw the expression of fear that flashed in their faces at the mention of this man's name.

"And Ryan is?" he prompted them to continue.

"He's a big, scary guy who looked after us and many other people, kind of like you, Mr. Negan but he was mean and he killed people," Molly recounted. Negan tried not to laugh at her impression that he was not a killer like this Ryan she talked about.

"Why did this prick killed her?" Negan felt Patrick give him a quick glance. If he knew better, Patrick was silently asking him to stop. It was clearly distressing for the girls to recount what they had gone through before he found them.

"He was going crazy so killed a lot of people that day, including Mrs. Tully. Mom killed him then she took us all away, me, Molly, Carly and Emily," Jamie replied.

"Your Momma's a tough little bitch, I'll tell you that," chuckled Negan. He looked at Tully's adopted daughters and saw their concern for their adoptive mother's wellbeing. "Don't worry, a sturdy chick like her will survive a simple wound infection," he told the girls, giving them a reassuring smile.

* * *

For a couple of days Tully slept like a baby. It was the first time since the world ended that she actually slept like a rock. For many months Tully had been used to getting at least a couple of hours of sleep while she dedicated the remaining hours making sure that her loved ones were safe. Patrick assured the girls that she was going to be fine and that she will wake up soon enough once her body recovered from the trauma that her severe infection caused. They looked after her and would often spend time during the day changing her bandages.

When Tully finally opened her eyes and gained consciousness, the pain on her wound eased up significantly. She felt very refreshed and she would've thought that everything that happened during the past several months had been a dream if she didn't recognised the room she was in. There were no sign of the girls and judging by the significant amount of light in the room, it was still daylight. She got up from the bed, wondering how long she had been sleeping. She slipped on her boots and peered through the bandages that concealed her wound, surprisingly, it had been stitched up with no more sign of bleeding or the horrible pus.

The noise from downstairs instantly earned Tully's attention as soon as she walked out of the room. She followed it and eventually found herself downstairs where she realised that there was a small group of Saviors gathered around what seemed to be some sort of ping-pong game. "Motherfucker, that's a good one, kid!" exclaimed a very familiar voice.

Tully weaved her way through the crowd until she got towards the front and what she witnessed greatly stunned her. Engaged in what seemed to be a pretty intense ping-pong match was none other than Negan. With him was her Molly, much to Tully's amazement and shock. Carly and Jamie, who were also a part of the audience noticed Tully's sudden presence and they rushed towards her in glee, clearly relieved to see her awake and well. Tully was greeted by their embrace as Molly, who was clearly distracted now, asked Negan for a time out. Before Negan could approve her request to pause the game, Molly abandoned her position and leaped into her adoptive mother's arms.

"Mommy!" Molly exclaimed excitedly as she hugged Tully in all fours. Negan, as well as the other Saviors around, witnessed the reunion occur.

"How long have I been out? Are you girls okay? Did you used my points to get food?" the motherly side of Tully took over as she asked about the girl's well-being.

"Relax Mom, Mr. Negan looked after us while you were gone as well as Sherry and Amber," clarified Jamie. The information stunned Tully. She was grateful and understood why Negan's wives would look after her girls but Negan…she was confused by his intentions.

By now, Tully realised that the area had been vacated and it seemed that Negan had dismissed the audience of the ping-pong battle. She heard his footsteps approach and looked up at the man clad in his familiar black leather jacket. "T-Thank you, for looking after my girls," she told him sincerely.

He nodded his head in acknowledgement. "Molly, get off your mother, she'll fuck up her shoulder again if you let her carry you like a baby," he told the girl with fiery red hair. Molly blushed and looked sheepish as she wriggled out of Tully's grasp and got back on her feet. "Atta girl," grinned Negan, pleased that the girl was obedient.

A few seconds of silence passed and Tully felt his gaze on her, she grew quite uncomfortable. "Um, thanks again," she repeated awkwardly before she gathered the girls and left him.

Tully slaved herself away for the rest of the day working to earn points in order to afford for her and the girls' daily needs. She also made sure that the girls were nowhere near Negan. Somehow, it scared her a little to see them together like that. It was as if she missed something big in the past couple of days while she was unconscious and all of the sudden, her girls were no longer afraid of the intimidating man and actually considered him as their friend. While she did her chores, she thought excessively about how much she owed Negan. She knew she owed him a lot, more than what she could possibly earn through the point system in a month. For people like her at the bottom of the pyramid who don't get to indulge like Negan and the others at the top part of the pyramid, she had to work hard to earn points to afford the things she would need in the Sanctuary from food to medical supplies. Nothing was free in the Sanctuary. The fact that Negan had to provide her with medical help meant that she was in massive debt. Medical help, after all, was very costly. Not to mention, he also kept the girls fed while she was unconscious which contributed to more debts.

That evening, Tully sent her girls to bed early and continued to worry about how she was going to pay for her current debt as she watched them sleep. She knew that it just wouldn't be her who had to work harder to pay for their debt but her girls too. If one can't pay their debt, it would be considered stealing and Tully knew clearly by now what happens to thieves in the Sanctuary and she was very close to facing the hot iron.

A knock on her door halted her thoughts and Tully watched the knob turn and the door open. A skimpily dressed woman stepped inside the room. Tully recognised her immediately as one of Negan's many wives, Amber. "Negan wants to see you," the woman informed her, "now."

She got up from her seat on the floor next to the sleeping girls and followed the woman out of the room and to Negan's office. The woman left her standing in front of the door and quickly disappeared out of sight as Tully nervously brought her hand up and knocked softly.

"Come in," he heard the faint sound of his familiar voice from inside the room. She sighed to herself, unaware of what's to come and opened the door. She found him standing in front of the large window with the curtains slightly parted open, his back was facing her when she stepped inside the room. "Close the door," he said. Quietly, Tully did as she was told.

At the sound of the door being closed, Negan immediately turned around and faced her. He still wore his black, leather jacket and his hands were inside the front pockets of his trousers. She noticed that he looked tired and wondered to herself whether he had dinner already. She didn't recall him coming to the cafeteria earlier. She thought excessively in an attempt to distract her mind from how nervous she was feeling. She noticed the chandelier hanging from the ceiling and began to wonder where he got it from, it clearly did not belong in the factory.

"How are the girls?" he asked her, his tone was surprisingly soft.

"They're asleep," came her quick reply. He nodded his head and slowly walked towards her. She was tempted to turn around and leave the room. He was making her feel weird, as always. His simple presence made her feel strange, in a confusing sort of way. She knew he intimidated her and she tried hard not to show him that but he made her feel something else…something very unfamiliar and odd at the same time.

"How's your shoulder?" he asked again. She looked at him. He was intimidatingly tall with broad shoulders. He was grinning at her, it revealed the dimples on his cheeks. She looked at his teeth in an attempt to distract herself and wondered how one managed to have such perfectly straight teeth.

"Fine," again, her response was short and clipped. He stepped closer towards her. She noticed that he hasn't shaved and his scruff was the colour of salt and pepper. She almost wondered what it would feel like against her palms.

"You know, the treatment you got for your infection is fucking costly," he pointed out. Immediately, she realised why he asked to see her. He was probably going to ask her how she was going to pay for her debt.

"I'll do more chores," she clarified as her brown eyes met his'. Unlike her deep, chocolate brown eyes, his eyes were a much lighter and warmer tone with a tinge of green.

"I don't think that's going to be fucking enough, darling," he smirked as he looked at her expectantly, waiting to see what she had to say about it. She knew he was challenging her.

"I'll do more chores," she repeated herself. Negan's smirk remained on his face.

"What do you think about joining the best fucking club in the Sanctuary, eh?" he offered her. "I'm always open to the idea of having another wife. One more pussy never hurt anyone," he grinned but Tully only felt sick to the stomach.

She looked at him like he was crazy. "I'm not going to become one of your wives," she exclaimed, sounding as if his very suggestion offended her greatly.

"Okay," Negan smiled, he was surprisingly calm and still pretty arrogant despite being rejected, "would you accept the awesome fucking offer if I tell you that your girls won't have to work to earn points and so will you if you become my wife?" he pressed, well aware of her weakness. He knew that once the girls were brought into the equation, he can manipulate her easier. Negan liked to practice his control over his people and she was no exception.

The offer was very tempting and Negan knew damn well that she was beginning to consider it as a minute of silence passed. "No." Her final response surprised him.

His overconfident smile dropped. "Why fucking not?" he demanded.

Her response to his offer was not what he expected and it clearly irritated him. She was glad it did. "I'm going to pay my debts by doing extra work even if it takes me an eternity to do it," Tully told him sternly. "I don't support something as degrading to women as polygamy and I will never be a wife to someone I have no feelings for, especially if he's a misogynistic jerk. You might be used to manipulating plenty of women around here to open their legs for you in exchange for shelter, food and protection but I'm not weak and dependent like them. Besides, I don't think you are a fit fatherly figure for my girls," she told him simply, pleased to wipe away the smirk on his face from earlier. "Good night, Negan." She turned around and left, slamming the door shut loudly behind her, pleased that for once, she controlled the situation that left him with very little power.

* * *

 **hey guys, i hope you enjoyed this chapter!**

 **don't forget to drop a REVIEW and let me know what you think**


	7. Chapter 7

**hey guys, sorry for the super late update**

 **i'm not gonna lie, i've been slacking off a lot lately and i'm really sorry for being lazy but it's only because it's my semester break and i want to spend it chilling/relaxing after a very busy semester so i haven't really edited my drafts lol**

 **anyways, thanks so much for the reviews and i hope you will enjoy this new chapter**

* * *

The kitchen was very busy during the early hours of the morning. A pair of calloused hands kneaded the dough as someone shouted orders, claiming that breakfast was due in just a couple of hours. Tully cut off the dough into little pieces while Molly arranged them on the trays, Carly brushed water on top of them and Jamie brought them to the makeshift oven. It was only five in the morning but the kitchen was already very busy.

"Why don't you girls go back to bed, I'll wake you all up when it's our time to eat. I can do the rest of the work from here," Tully informed her girls. Although she never told them, the girls knew that the reason for Tully taking more work than ever was to pay for her medical-related debt. They started helping her a lot more and as result, it left them very fatigue and despite her usual request for them to rest and leave her to fulfil the chores on her own, the girls refused to follow. They saw what Negan could do to anyone who didn't follow the rules and if Tully failed to pay the debt, their mother would suffer a terrible fate.

"We're not sleepy anymore," Carly clarified. That turned out to be a lie because an hour later, when the kitchen was busier than ever, Molly, the youngest was curled up in the corner, fast asleep.

Soon, the dining area was very busy and while Jamie and Carly helped served breakfast, Tully was busy producing more food in the kitchen. Some time later, one of the other kitchen workers, Jenny, stepped back inside after her cigarette break. "Negan and Amber are fighting again," Jenny shared the daily gossip that she witnessed while she was on her smoke break. One thing Tully always found exciting whenever she worked in the kitchen was the gossip that the workers would share amongst each other. The news, often juicy, provided her with information about what was going on around the compound.

"She's thinking of leaving him again?" guessed Sarah.

"She's thinking of going back to Mark," Jenny confirmed. While Negan took a number of wives to form his harem, every woman had the freedom to leave him and surrender their status as his wife. If one choose to stop being his wife, they would no longer be privileged and they move from the upper part of the pyramid to the bottom. It also meant they have to work and earn points like most of the population.

"If I was young and good looking, I'd be his damn wife in a heartbeat. Those bitches don't do shit, stupid spoiled bitches," grumbled the bitter Sarah. "So did she decided to leave?"

"No, I heard her tell him she loved him as I was passing by so I guess she's staying," Jenny replied.

Sarah snorted, "and we know how much of a bullshit that is," she chuckled.

"He knows that, he knows they never mean it when they tell him that," laughed Jenny, "I guess he just likes to hear them say it, it makes him feel even more dominant, I suppose."

Tully glanced at the gossiping women before resuming on the task at hand. It had been a few days since she rejected Negan's offer to be his wife and she was very lucky that she hasn't seen him since then. It made her a little nervous because she knew he was not happy about being rejected. He was so confident that she would accept his offer after all and by declining it, she had bruised his ego. Her instincts told her that although he was quiet for now, he may be plotting something to make her pay for rejecting him...or worse, he was just taking his time, waiting for the right time to strike like a typical predator. Either way, she was still very glad that she refused such ludicrous offer. It was tempting to accept it simply because it meant that her girls will have a more comfortable life. She loved her girls but she would not degrade herself to give them a nice, comfortable life. She'd provide them a proper life by putting all the effort she could instead.

After breakfast, Tully helped clean up the kitchen to earn more points. The more points she earn, the quicker she could pay her debt and that was Tully's goal. She was exhausted by the end of it and the day was only getting started. Molly was still fast asleep in the corner and Tully picked up the sleeping girl, struggling a little with her healing shoulder.

"You girls go with Sarah, I'll meet you all in the courtyard. I'll just take Molly to our room," she instructed Jamie and Carly. They parted ways and Tully carried the sleeping child in her arms. While her shoulder was healing fine, she was only beginning to regain the strength of her entire left shoulder and arm back. Tully struggled a little as she climbed up the stairs while carrying a sleeping eight-year-old in her arms.

When someone met her halfway up the stairs and took Molly from her arms, Tully was taken by surprise. As she looked up to see who her helper was, the grateful expression on her face was replaced by an unimpressed scowl. "Great, is this going to cost me too?" she muttered under her breath as she watched Negan carry Molly with ease as he proceeded to climb up the stairs.

"If you just swallow your damn pride, this kid wouldn't have to be so fucking overworked," Negan claimed as she followed him to the room she shared with the girls.

Tully scoffed. "So you're saying that I'm being selfish when I decided not to be your wife and because of it my children now have to work so we can afford to eat in this place and pay my debt?" she asked him. "Tell me again who's the jerk who came up with such a stupid point system?"

"I don't fucking recall saying that much fucking words," he claimed smugly. He placed Molly down gently on the sleeping mat before turning to look at her with a scowl on his face. "I'm simply saying that you're a fucking party pooper," he stated. Negan hated losing and being rejected meant losing. He wasn't going to stop this battle. He was just getting started.

She shook her head at his childishness and his inability to get the message. "I'm not going to be your wife, Negan. I love the girls and I want them to live comfortably but I'm not going to degrade myself to provide them with a good life when there are other ways available for me. I didn't spend a whole year in college doing women's studies only to be a harlot to an arrogant man like you," she told him. She was irritated and cross and the strange emotions that took over her whenever he was near didn't help either.

"Harlot," he chuckled as Tully caught sight of his dimples re-appear, "people still use that fucking word?" His little comment only made her frown.

She folded her arms across her chest and glared at him. "And did I forget to mention that you're not a fit father to my girls?" she decided to add, hoping that it will pour more salt on the wound she hoped she created when she rejected him.

Negan looked at her with an eyebrow raised, as if he could not believe what she just said. "I don't like to fucking brag, Candy, so you should ask little Molly over here when she wakes up as well as Jamie and Carly how much of a great fatherly figure I was while you were fucking busy being Sleepy Beauty," Negan claimed. "I often wonder if your fucking mouth's good at doing other things other than yap on and on, if you know what I fucking mean," he paused only to send a wink her way. Tully only glared at him angrily. "When I do find out, I hope you have an excellent fucking gag reflex because trust me, you're going to forget what you fucking learned from that goddamn women's studies class you took when I'm done with you," again, he looked very smug, well aware that he had won that particular round. Before she could say anything else, Negan began to walk out of the room, leaving a very red-faced Tully.

He stopped just in front of the door only to look over his shoulder. He saw a very red-faced Tully standing where he had left her, his smug, dimpled smile only grew wider. "Oh, and by the way, Trevor's pretty ill at the moment so you'll be cleaning the toilets. Have fun," he grinned before trudging out of the room.

* * *

Tully heard her back crack as she tiredly removed her dirty shirt. She was exhausted after a busy day and she cursed Negan to hell for making her do one of the worse chores in the Sanctuary. She knew that he was starting to make her feel his wrath by being a jerk and assigning her to clean the toilets but she would rather clean the dirty toilets than be a sex slave to a smug jerk like him.

The room was illuminated by the moonlight that entered through the large window. Lying on the sleeping mat were three girls who kept themselves awake by exchanging stories they invented using their active imaginations. A few minutes later and Tully crawled on the floor and positioned herself next to the sleeping mat. There was no room for her on the mat and she was used to sleeping on the floor with just a bundle of her clothes acting as her pillow.

"Just because you girls can sleep in tomorrow doesn't mean you have to sleep late tonight," she murmured tiredly, interrupting the girls' conversation. For the next day, Tully had taken an early duty patrolling the gate and that particular job restricted the girls from coming with her. A group of Saviors, as well as Negan himself, would be leaving early tomorrow to collect supplies which meant that the compound will be lacking the usual manpower once they were gone. Tully didn't hesitate to take the job as a gate guard while most men were gone simply because such perilous duty provided more points than the chores she would normally do with the girls.

"Is Mr. Negan leaving tomorrow?" Molly wondered out loud.

"Yes, thank goodness because I'm getting sick of seeing his face all the time," quickly, Tully replied bitterly as she lay on her back and stared at the ceiling with a frown on her face.

"I like having him around," admitted Jamie, "he's actually really funny."

Tully wondered if she heard Jamie right. "What makes you say that?" she asked the girl, feeling a little betrayed that Jamie felt that way.

"He told us really funny stories when he was looking after us while you were sick. We also played Monopoly and I beat him a couple of times, it was very funny," Jamie recounted.

"I also taught Mr Negan how to braid Jamie's hair!" exclaimed Carly excitedly.

"Oh that was pretty funny too, he was so confused," giggled Jamie at the recollection of the event.

"Well I beat Mr. Negan in a ping pong game and he told me I was more talented than anyone else around here," arrogantly, Molly claimed.

"You only won because he was going easy on you, he was letting you win, obviously," Carly pointed out before both girls argued back and forth until Tully had to tell them to stop for the fifth time.

As Tully lay on the floor, she began to wonder whether she had been wrong about him. Perhaps there was something more to him than a leader who liked to be in control over every single member of his group. Based on how the girls seem to adore him all of the sudden, Tully was well aware that he had won their affection and she began to wonder…maybe, just maybe, she was wrong when she told him he wasn't a fit father.

"Remember when we first got here," Tully spoke a few minutes later, disrupting the girls' whispered conversation, "Almost two weeks ago, I told you girls that we're going to wait two weeks before we decide if we're going to stay here or leave. We've been here for almost two weeks, do any of you still want to leave and go somewhere else?" Tully asked, recalling the girl's dislike towards the Sanctuary during their first night in the place.

"Nuh-uh, I like it here now," Molly was the first one to respond.

"Yeah, I like living here. I've got friends here now," Carly agreed.

"I like it better here than Ryan's place and Mr. Negan is a better leader than Ryan," Jamie pointed out, "don't you like it here, Mom? Mr. Negan doesn't hurt, unlike Ryan and we always have food here."

Tully glanced at the girls briefly. Terrible memories came flooding back to her at the mention of that single name. Ryan was the fiend who led their group when the world ended and the authorities disappeared and everyone had to fend for themselves. Ryan was full of promise at first, he took care of everybody until the power got to him. He was the same man who molested Emily and threatened her so she would keep quiet about it until she got pregnant by accident. Tully's mother confronted the man and the confrontation turned very bloody. Ryan was the first man Tully ever killed. He was the reason why a part of her humanity disappeared. Since Ryan, Tully vowed she would protect her girls which included her sister, Jamie, Carly and Molly. When Emily passed away, she blamed Ryan for it but at the same time, she also blamed herself, for not being able to see the problem and protect Emily from Ryan before it was too late.

"Mom, you didn't answer my question," Jamie pointed out as Tully realised she had been quiet for some time as she recalled the bitter memories associated with Ryan.

"Y-Yeah, this place is okay," she murmured, a part of her believed her words while another doubted the truthfulness of it. The girls may have found the reason to like the Sanctuary but for Tully, it's going to take a miracle for her to fall in love with their new home.


	8. Chapter 8

From her post, Tully could hear the moans and hungry growls of the walkers that were chained and staked around the compound, acting as part of the Sanctuary's protective gates. It was only daybreak and the first sign of the morning light were beginning to creep in. She looked through the scope of her rifle and used it as her personal binocular to stalk the men busy preparing to leave the compound. Among them was a familiar leather-wearing, baseball-bat-wielding man.

She didn't know exactly where Negan and a number of his men were headed. She was only aware of the fact that they were leaving the Sanctuary to collect more supplies from groups that owed them. Since her first few days in the Sanctuary, Tully learned that the Saviours led by Negan often offered protection to many groups in the area. She never found out where exactly these groups were situated or what the Saviors were protecting them from. She guessed they used the Saviors' services to protect them from the walkers and in turn, they have to pay Negan valuable supplies such as food and medicine. For now, Tully only had to rely on her imagination and assume all this. No one in the compound seem to want to talk about the Savior's activities outside the Sanctuary and it seemed to be something exclusive to Negan and his henchmen. She didn't feel comfortable asking around and appearing nosey. Gossip traveled fast in the Sanctuary and she didn't want Negan to see her as someone nosey, she wanted to stay in his good sides even if lately, he had been getting on her nerves with his offer for her to join his harem.

The sound of the revving motorcycle engines soon filled Tully's ears. The group was set up like how it had been when she first stalked the Saviors on the road and attempted to steal from them. There were two armed men riding motorcycles ahead of the group, a large truck for the supplies they will collect and three motorcycles behind the truck. Close after this first group were vehicles that acted as backup, Negan was among them, he was sitting in the passenger seat of a pickup truck behind the last three motorcycles and driven by Dwight.

A cue was given and the gates were opened. Tully remained in her post and watched as the convoy left through the narrow opening of the gate. The walkers growled louder, clearly attracted by the vehicle lights and noisy motorcycles. As soon as the last car had gotten out of the compound, the gates were shut and Tully watched the line of vehicle disappear out of sight.

* * *

Later that morning after her shift guarding the compound, Tully found herself entering the room that resembled a brothel. Tully had never been to the room before and she instantly realized that the room she had been assigned to clean was none other than Negan's wives' room.

The room was one of the biggest rooms in the building and it served as the exclusive quarters for Negan's wives. Negan's harem was made up of a number of good-looking women and they often spent many hours of the day in the room. They would keep themselves busy by socialising with each other, doing leisurely activities, sometimes by gossiping and more often by playing cards. They had an easy life in the Sanctuary, they didn't had to work to earn points to afford life in the Sanctuary. They only had one role as Negan's wives. They were his sexual partners. He had one simple rule for them too that they should follow to maintain their status and position in the upper part of the social pyramid. They had to be faithful to Negan, they cannot cheat on him or someone will be punished.

When Tully first learned about Negan's wives, she was immediately disgusted. However, she also felt very intimidated by Negan more than ever when she learned about his harem. The fact that he had multiple women he referred to as his wives who were all willing to let him do whatever he wanted to do with them simply meant that the man was very cunning. He was clearly a master of manipulation. He controlled the women in the harem and had somehow convinced them that being a part of his harem was their only way of surviving. Of course, it could also be possible that the women in his harem no longer cared about their dignity and were too lazy to work to earn their keep unlike Tully and many others in the bottom half of the pyramid.

"There's not much to clean up around here, honey," noticing her presence, one of the skimpily dressed women addressed Tully. Somehow, Tully was glad that her girls were still asleep in their room which meant they didn't have to witness such horrid environment. It also made her damn proud that she didn't let Negan trick or manipulate her into becoming one of his wives.

Tully nodded at the large, California king bed. It was the only bed in the room. "Do you want me to change the sheets?" she asked the woman who had addressed her earlier. She recalled her name as Natalie.

"Oh don't worry about that," Natalie smiled. She turned to the other women in the room, they were just as skimpily dressed as her. It seemed like Negan liked to dress his wives provocatively like prostitutes. "The cleaner's here, do you want her to do anything?" she asked the others. Tully tried not to scowl at the name she had been called. She would much rather be called 'Candy' than 'Cleaner'.

There was a series of 'no' in response to Natalie's question. "The room's pretty clean, Negan hasn't visited any of us in over a week," admitted Natalie. This surprised Tully. She had simply assumed that Negan was some sort of sex maniac who wanted sexual intercourse every day of the week given the fact that he had five wives.

"Okay, I'll just pick the laundry up then," Tully replied. Natalie and the others went to get their dirty clothes as Tully busied herself cleaning a little by picking up some litter which included a few food packagings.

"Be gentle with this bra when you wash it please," Amber told her as Tully received the laundry she asked for from the women. Tully tried her hardest not to roll her eyes. Although she owed Amber as well as Sherry for looking after her girls while she was sick, she can't help but feel a little irritated by her superficiality as well as the other wives. They lived in a new world where the dead were coming back to life and Tully truly believed that some skimpy lingerie should be the least of anyone's worry.

She faked a smile. "Okay," she said anyway.

* * *

It was just in time for supper when Negan and his men finally arrived after a long day. Most instantly made their way to the dining area as soon as the supplies were delivered to the storeroom. Negan was among them. He was starving and he was glad that he won't be eating something that tasted like cardboard cooked by Sarah. Since Tully's arrival in the kitchen, the food in the Sanctuary had improved significantly. It was not because they had better food to serve but because she can make anything taste darn nice. She can turn bland canned beans into flavoursome dishes but if it was Sarah, the woman would just serve the beans straight from the can and when confronted, she'd explain that opening the cans was classified as cooking in her book.

When Negan stepped into the bustling dining area, his eyes instantly searched for a particular person behind the counter. He made his way to the counter in fast, long strides, stopping only to pick up a tray for himself. "Good evening," he greeted her with a playful dimpled grin on his face. Instantly, she scowled at the sight of him.

"There's nothing good about my evening now," she muttered under her breath, loud enough for him to hear.

"Fuck," laughed Negan heartily, "that's not a fucking nice thing to say. You broke my fucking heart, Candy, well fucking done," he clapped his hands with a smug grin on his face. Tully simply rolled her eyes and snatched the tray he held in his hands to get her job over and done with. "Christ, Candy, I swear to you, you're going to have less fucking attitude when you get laid," he stated.

"You are so…-" Tully was almost immediately cut off.

"Charming?" Negan finished with a playful smirk on his face.

"No, I was thinking more of-…"

"Fucking handsome?" Negan interrupted her.

Tully frowned. "Annoying is the word I was looking for," she told him. Negan continued to smile, unaffected by her attempt to insult him. She handed him his tray back. "If you'll excuse me, I have plenty of work to do and being your personal harlot will never be one of them."


	9. Chapter 9

**hello everyone!**

 **this author's note might be a little long (skip it if you like) because i have a handful of things to let you guys know. firstly, if you haven't done it yet, go and check out the Season 7 Comic-con trailer of TWD, it's super duper epic! secondly, i wanna say sorry for updating so late because TBH i've been focusing on my other Negan fanfic (if you haven't checked it out yet, you totally should it's called 'The Girl with Kaleidoscope Eyes') and finally, i think i mentioned the fact that i finished writing this story already before but recently, I realised that I didn't like the later chapters I have written for this story because I thought Tully's character was becoming too predictable and mary-sueish and i thought the ending was too tragic and you guys might hate me for it so I tweaked and made plenty of changes.**

 **anyway, I'll be updating as much as i can now that I'm sure about the ending of this story ^^**

 **oh and please don't forget to drop a REVIEW because I would like to hear from you guys :) oh and also thank you so much for the FOLLOWS! I was plagued with emails the other day and it made me so happy hehe it totally made my day so thank you to all you lovely readers following this story**

 **oh and one last point (i'm really sorry for this long message ) one of the reviewers asked whether Daryl will appear in the story and start a love triangle, sadly no, there won't be a love triangle so to that lovely reader, I apologise if that answer disappointed you, it's just that this story occurred before Negan crossed paths with the Alexandrians. I'm sorry again but who knows...I'm not saying Daryl will make an appearance but he might...OR he might not (you just gotta keep reading) but if he does pop up, there still won't be a love triangle sorry**

 **anyways, enjoy this super long chapter everyone! i hope this long chapter will make up for my late update**

* * *

Tully's heart was soaring with pride three weeks later since she moved to the Sanctuary. She just paid her big debt to Negan after earning enough points. She owed Negan because he had provided her with the medicine she needed to get her shoulder injury treated despite Tully lacking enough points to afford it. As soon as she earned enough points to pay for her debt, she proudly informed him about it. She was very proud of her achievement. She certainly knew that it made him realise that she wasn't like his wives. She wasn't feeble and she was certainly independent enough to fend for her and her girls without relying on him.

"Well, I'm fucking impressed, Candy," Negan admitted. "I'll give you some fucking credit. I've seen you work your ass off harder than some of my fucking men."

Tully blushed at his compliment. "Thank you," she smiled. She was very proud of herself and she felt even better knowing she was rubbing her achievement on his face.

"I found some stuff the girls might like," he told her as he pointed at a pile of comic books on his desk. Tully can't help but look at him with a surprised expression on her face.

"You don't have to-…"

"Calm down, Candy, it's fucking free," he assured her. He had his dimpled smile on his face again and Tully once again wondered how he could have such perfectly straight teeth. In fact, someone like him didn't deserve the cute dimples he had, she thought to herself. "It's not for you, it's for the girls," clarified Negan, "they have been working their little asses off too and to be fucking honest with you, I like your girls, Candy, I never had kids of my own and those girls are fucking awesome." She blushed.

"Thank you, Negan." He nodded his head, letting her know he was dismissing her. Quietly, Tully gathered the comic books that Negan donated to the girls and left the room. While she was delighted that she paid off her debt and Negan seemed impressed about it, a part of Tully was still a little intrigued and suspicious towards Negan's interest in the girls.

Three weeks of living in the Sanctuary and her girls were content with their new life. Tully could sense that leaving was nowhere near their priorities at the moment and perhaps it never will be. Although the girls had to do chores to afford their basic necessities, they enjoy the Sanctuary overall. Tully noticed lately that the girls were fairly popular in the compound and anyone they encountered would know at least one of the girls. They were friendly and also hardworking. Sometimes, Tully felt bad that they had to follow her around and help her do some arduous chores. It would often leave them exhausted, particularly the youngest, Molly but they never complained, not even once. They know the drill to be able to earn their keep. Tully often fantasised the day when her girls no longer have to do laborious chores to afford their life but she knew that it will just be a fantasy unless she accept one particular offer that can make all their lives a lot easier in the Sanctuary.

While Negan stopped bringing up the offer she rejected, Tully had been hearing a ton of gossips from Jenny and Sarah whenever she was working in the kitchen. Gossip circulated fast in the compound and Tully was grateful that Jenny and Sarah were her bearers of juicy news. The word was that Negan hasn't slept with any of his wives for almost two weeks. It was clearly unusual because if it wasn't, Sarah and Jenny wouldn't be talking about it non-stop. They found it very intriguing that Negan stopped sleeping with his wives all of the sudden when most people in the compound were aware that beforehand, Negan would often select different women in his harem every night to sleep with. Tully found it little odd too and hoped to hear the reason why from Sarah's and Jenny's mouths soon enough.

* * *

The following day, the kitchen was busy as always. There were about seventy people to feed and in a couple of hours, the dining area would have a queue of people waiting to be fed. Tully wiped the sweat off her brows as she busied herself chopping the vegetables with Jamie's help. The two youngest girls, Molly and Carly, monitored the large pot that contained boiling hot water and a bunch of potatoes for the mash. Jenny had just walked out of the room in a coughing fit, the cigarettes were slowly killing her.

"Mark offered to teach me how to use a gun, can I?" Jamie asked Tully all of the sudden while they were busy with the chore. At just ten years old, the harsh new world forced the child to mature very fast. In their little family, Jamie acted as the big sister to the two younger girls despite Tully treating them all the same as her babies.

"I don't think-…"

"Please Mom," pleaded the girl, "I know how to use a knife and kill walkers with it, you and Emily taught me that but I think it'll be pretty cool to use a gun," she momentarily paused when she saw Tully's stern look at the mention of the word 'cool' as she described guns, "I mean, it's _helpful_ to learn how to use a gun. I can protect you, Carly and Molly if I need to."

"I see your point but I don't think it's very necessary right now to learn how to use a gun," Tully admitted. She saw the girl pout at her and sighed to herself. "Fine but I'll speak to him about it first."

Jamie grinned as she wrapped her arms excitedly around Tully's waist. "Thank you, Mommy," beaming with delight, she exclaimed.

Jamie's celebration was short-lived when they both heard a very sharp hissing noise that was almost immediately followed by an explosion. The commotion came from the makeshift, wood burning stove. Accompanying the noise were the screams that came from the two girls standing in front of the stove. Much to Tully's horror, as soon as she turned around, she found Molly and Carly on the floor. The scalding hot water exploded out of the pot for some unknown reason. As a result of the incident, the two girls who were closest to it were sprayed with hot water.

Tully rushed to the two girls on the ground and her heart instantly dropped at the sight of their red and severely burnt skin. "Are you girls okay?" she asked both of them as Jamie and Tully helped the girls up from the ground. Their arms and faces were red and badly burnt by the hot water.

"It hurts," the teary-eyed Molly exclaimed, while Carly was speechless from the throbbing pain all over her burnt skin.

"Jesus Christ, Tully, take the girls to the infirmary! NOW!" Sarah exclaimed, she was clearly just as horrified as Tully at the sight of the girls and their injury.

"We'll take care of everything here, don't worry. Just get the girls treated, those burns look painful," Jenny, who rushed back inside the kitchen upon hearing the commotion, assured her.

Tully didn't even know how to absorb the situation. One thing she knew was that she needed to get help. She picked both girls up and carried both of them out of the kitchen with Jamie behind her. Their cries and sobs filled Tully's ears. She didn't even struggle as she carried the two girls all the way to the infirmary despite her recently healed injury. Adrenaline was the only thing that gave her strength as her heart sunk to the very pit of her stomach.

The infirmary was an old office that contained all the medical supplies of the Sanctuary. A man named Patrick looked after the infirmary. He used to be a veterinarian and his role included treating patients, looking after the medical supplies in the infirmary and checking whether anyone who would ask for medical supplies can afford it using the point system practised in the Sanctuary. When Tully stepped inside the infirmary, carrying two crying girls in her arms, Patrick's first initial question was if she had enough points to afford medicine for the girls' burns. Tully's heart sunk even more.

"No," she answered straightforwardly, "Can't I pay for it later, when I earn more extra points?" she asked.

"Can't do that," scowled Patrick. "Look, you and I both need to follow the rules, sorry kid, you have to pay upfront like the rules state unless you have special permission from Negan."

Frustrated, Tully placed the girls on the infirmary bed. "Fine, I'll talk to Negan."

She left her girls and assured them that she would be back in five minutes. With one destination in mind, she walked briskly to the direction of Negan's office. She hoped that he was there because she was not in the mood to go around the compound searching for him. In less than two minutes, Tully found herself standing in front of Negan's office door. Nervous but hopeful at the same time, she brought her hand up and knocked loudly.

"Come in," he heard the faint sound of his familiar voice from inside the room. She sighed to herself in relief, she was glad that she found him easily. When she opened the door, she found him sitting behind his desk. On his desk were several maps and his baseball bat wrapped in barbed wire, Lucille. Negan looked up from his maps and watched her step inside. "Close the door," he ordered her. Quietly, Tully did as she was told. "What do you want?"

She was clearly distressed, he could tell clearly by the expression on her face. Negan instantly guessed it was something that involved the girls even before she opened her mouth. "There has been an accident in the kitchen, Molly and Carly-…"

"Slow fucking down, I can't understand a single word," he interrupted her.

Tully inhaled sharply, attempting to calm herself down. Her heart was racing and she was desperate to get Molly's and Carly's burns treated. "There has been an accident in the kitchen," slowly, she explained, "Molly and Carly, they-…" her voice trailed off and Negan watched as she wiped the tears off her eyes as she held back a sob. She was starting to cry and it instantly peaked his interest. The last time he'd seen her cry was when he had been watching her in the woods as she held a dead woman in her arms. "…I don't have enough points," she managed to explain, "I need medicine but Patrick won't give me any."

Negan wiped an invisible dust off Lucille. Noisily, he got up from his seat. "And what the fuck do you want me to do?" he wondered. She looked at him. He was intimidatingly tall with broad shoulders and posture that clearly showed his confidence and dominance.

"I want you to let me pay for the medicine later when I earn more points, like last time with my injury," she replied to his question bluntly. Negan laughed.

"Fuck no," he replied simply. "The rules are fucking there and I'm sorry darling but you're no fucking exception. You can't have anything from that infirmary if you can't fucking afford it."

She scowled at him. It wasn't the response she was hoping for. "Negan the girls are in pain! What do you want me to do about it!?"

He shrugged. "I don't give a shit," he said simply. "Do I look like their fucking parent?" He was grinning at her, it revealed the dimples on his cheeks. Tully wanted nothing but to punch him in the face at that very moment. "If I fucking recall things correctly, you said that I'm not a fucking fit father so here I fucking am, in all my fucking glory." She knew very well that he was mocking her.

Negan was unable to hide the sudden look of surprise on his face when she began to undo her shirt. The stunned expression on his face was replaced by a cocky little smirk when she proceeded to undo her pants. He chuckled as his eyes hungrily ravished the sight before him as she stood dressed merely in her cotton black bra and panties. While her choice of lingerie was certainly very basic in comparison to the lace, expensive, lingerie his wives would wear, her body was a whole different story. She had the perfect hourglass shape. Her skin looked soft and silky that he was tempted to find out what it felt like.

"What the fuck is this?" chuckled Negan. "Are you paying me with your pussy?" he asked with a chuckle. She looked at him blankly, she didn't have a single emotion on her face.

"I'm not going to be your wife and I know this is what you want," she told him. She tried to keep her voice steady. She was doing this for her girls, she reminded herself.

"I'll be fucking honest. I am so fucking tempted to bend you over, fuck your brains off and feel those gorgeous motherfucking tits of yours but I don't force a woman to do something she'll be fucking uncomfortable doing," he told her. She said nothing but he could tell that she didn't believe him. "Besides," he continued, "the only women I fuck are my wives, Candy. I'm a faithful lover," he grinned. She tried very hard not to roll her eyes or laugh at his little statement.

Tully gritted her teeth in irritation. She knew that he got her trapped right in the exact position he wanted her to be. She was now faced with a dilemma. She could either leave the room and tell the girls that she cannot provide them medicine after practically offering Negan her body like a common prostitute or she could finally accept his offer to be his wife and with that, she will be granted access to whatever she wanted because of the privileged status she would earn as his wife and therefore, she will get medicine for her girls and they don't have to work anymore.

"Fine, I'll be your wife," she caved in. It was the answer Negan expected. Pleased with himself, he grinned in delight.

"Funfuckingtastic," smiled Negan. "Go put your fucking clothes on and tell that dipshit Patrick that you're now my wife and he'll give you whatever you fucking need."

"Okay."

She hurriedly got dressed but before she could make her way out of the room, Negan called her. "Aren't you going to kiss your kind husband goodbye, Candy?" he asked.

Tully gulped and her stomach churned. Stiffly, she approached him. He had a smug smile on his face that she badly wanted to wipe off. She hated that he managed to get her to eat her words. She was humiliated by it and she hated herself. The only thing comforting about her decision was that Molly and Carly would get medicine for their burns soon.

Tully stopped right in front of him. He was a lot taller than her. She looked up at him and her deep brown eyes found his warm brown eyes, they had specks of green on them. Awkwardly, Tully stood on her tippy toes and touched his lips with hers. Instantly, she felt him snake his arms around her waist tightly and rather possessively. She was now his possession to hold and as he kissed her harshly, he was claiming her as his own. Tully felt the warmth and softness of his lips against hers as his scruff tickled her face. She tried her hardest not to get carried away. He was a good kisser but she had only been kissed on a few occasions.

It was him who ended the kiss a couple of minutes later. Tully was out of breath and was feeling hazy. Negan looked down at her with his eyes twinkling and there was a proud smirk on his face. "I want you in my room tonight, alright?" he held her chin with his thumb and index finger, disabling her from looking away from him.

"Okay," she replied to his request, no matter how much she was tempted to tell him to go to hell. She smiled like an obedient new wife and turned around to leave once he released her. As she walked out of the room, she was no longer the anonymous Tully who worked a handful of different chores daily, she had become one of Negan's many wives.


	10. Chapter 10

**hey everyone!**

 **i wanna say a MASSIVE thank you to everyone who left some reviews for chapter 9, thanks so so much guys, keep the goodness coming and here's a quick update & pretty long chapter as a thank you. also, a reader asked about the girls' reaction to tully's decision to be negan's wife and you will find the answer to that question in later chapters and to answer the other question, they will also be staying in their old room because tbh i don't think Tully would like her girls to live with the other wives, i hope that clear things up**

 ** _***IMPORTANT AUTHOR'S NOTE_ *** **

**Warning : There will be mild EXPLICIT CONTENT/ADULT THEMES** **in this chapter! (e.g. smut and the c-word)**

 **There will be a smutty scene below, it's not very descriptive and it's brief but i just wanna warn you guys about it just in case you don't read that kind of thing. Also, ****If you haven't noticed yet, i _changed the rating_ from T to M because when I first published this story, I didn't realise that I would have a smutty scene. I know I'm probably making a big deal out of a little thing but I ****just to be on the safe side in case i get reported...oh and also potty-mouth Negan drops the c-word for the first time (i think)...but if you actually like to have more smutty scenes pop up here and there in later chapters, do let me know and i'll see what i can do OR if you think it's absolutely unnecessary and stupid, let me know too and i'll never do it again lol...**

 **enjoy reading!**

 **p.s. ( if you wanna skip the smutty scene, just watch out for the warning written in bold and caps below)*****

* * *

Tully told herself over and over again not to be afraid. Her mind was a mess during the rest of the day as the hours ticked by leading to the evening she was expected to spend with Negan. All she had to do was open her legs and hope for the best, she thought to herself. Having sex with Negan wouldn't be so bad, she assured herself. It wasn't like Negan was physically repulsive…in fact, she would be lying if she told herself that he was physically unattractive because despite Negan being a few years her senior, he was handsome and fit for a man his age. In fact, apart from his charming, dimpled smile, there was a lot of things that were physically attractive about Negan. Personality-wise, however, Tully can't say the same. He may not be repulsive physical but his cocky personality tends to be.

After lunch, the nervous Tully saw the opportunity to approach one of Negan's wives, Sherry. Sherry was a tall and slender brunette who was only a few years older than Tully. Although Tully had only spoken to her a handful of times before, she was aware of the fact that before Sherry became Negan's wife, she was Dwight's wife. As well as that, Sherry was highly respected by the other wives and seen as the caring figure in Negan's harem. It's the reason why Tully decided she was the most approachable out of all of Negan's wives. "Can I help you?" Sherry asked when Tully cornered her on her way out of the dining area.

"I'd like to speak to you, privately," awkwardly, Tully replied, unsure what else to say. Sherry seemed stunned but accepted her request anyway. They waited until the dining area was empty before both women occupied an empty table in the corner of the room. "I'm, uh, I'm wondering if you can help me," nervously, Tully said. So far, only Patrick from the infirmary was aware of her new status as Negan's new wife and Tully was very aware that soon, the news will spread all over the compound like wildfire. "Y-You see, I agreed to be Negan's wife," Tully told Sherry, "he wants me to see him tonight. Obviously he wants to have sex and I'm not really sure what to do." she felt like she was a teenager again, sheepishly seeking for any form of advice from someone older and more experienced to aid her own inexperience. "Please don't tell anyone, I don't really want anyone to know about me and him," quickly, she added.

Sherry, who had been quiet the entire time as Tully shakily spoke, reached for Tully's hand resting on the table. "It's okay," she said softly. Sensing Tully's worry, Sherry decided to comfort and assure her. "Don't worry, I won't tell anybody. I heard about your girls and the kitchen accident this morning so I figure that must be your reason. I'm sorry, I hope they're doing well. It's in his nature to take advantage of a bad situation that will benefit him, that's the way Negan is," said Sherry.

"Don't feel bad, I never wanted to be Negan's wife too. I did it to make both Dwight and my life easier in this place," sensing that Tully was far from comfortable about her decision, Sherry explained hers, revealing information about herself to her new sister-wife. Tully could tell that the woman was still in love with her former husband. "Anyway, he won't expect too much from you as a wife so you don't have to worry too much about that," Sherry continued, shifting the topic of the conversation away from her personal life and back to Tully's earlier inquiry. "He's satisfied as long as you open your legs for him whenever he wants you to, remember not to cheat on him because that's his number one rule and always present yourself nicely." By present herself nicely, Tully knew it meant dressing in provocative clothing for Negan. She wasn't going to do that for him. She'd rather keep wearing her jeans than the tight mini-skirts that her sister-wives would wear. "Oh and Negan's not very pushy, he won't force himself on you. He hates taking advantage of women. I guess that's one of the good things about him, he's a bit of a gentleman," said Sherry, "you can leave him whenever you want too but as you might already know, you will lose your privileges as his wife if you do that."

"You mean I don't have to be his wife forever?" Tully was relieved to hear a way to escape the trap she was in.

"Yes, of course! You don't have to be his wife forever," laughed Sherry, "you can leave him anytime when you don't want to be a wife anymore. Negan can be pretty vicious but he can also be a decent human being when he wants to be, usually to women more than men," she explained.

After her talk with Sherry, Tully was less fearful of what was waiting for her during the evening. She can leave him…she was very much convinced that she would go to his room during the night when he's expecting her and she would tell him that their short 'marriage' was over.

* * *

Tully hummed a lullaby softly as three girls lay sleepily on the sleeping mat. Molly lay closest to her and she held her adoptive mother's hand firmly for comfort. It was an arduous day and Tully spent the rest of her day looking after the girls and making sure that her two youngest were feeling better. She gave them medicine to ease the pain they were feeling and treated their burns with ointments she acquired from the infirmary. She dreaded the day her girls hear about how she managed to get them medicine. Although she did what she did for them, she feared the day they learn that she accept Negan's offer to be his wife. Negan found the perfect opportunity to entrap her and she had fallen for the trap. Tully regretted it greatly but she would do anything for her girls even if it involved degrading herself in the process. Besides, after her talk with Sherry, Tully was less nervous because she knew there was a way out to the predicament she had gotten herself stuck in.

Hours passed before Tully felt Molly's tight grip on her hand finally loosen, informing her that the girl had fallen asleep. She kissed her sleeping girls goodnight in hopes that it would help comfort her a little. She left the room afterwards, afraid of what was waiting for her in the hands of Negan. She made her way to Negan's bedroom. His bedroom was located on the other side of the compound, away from his wives' quarters. Nervously, Tully stopped in front of his door and knocked quietly, hoping he would not hear or answer.

"Come in," her heart instantly dropped after hearing his voice from inside. She thought about her girls as she opened the door. "Close the door," he said. Tully closed it behind her. "Lock it," he ordered, she obeyed.

Negan was sitting on the windowsill and was watching her as she stood awkwardly a great distance away from him. She noticed that he looked tired and wondered to herself whether he had dinner already. She didn't recall seeing him in the dining area. He held a glass tumbler in his right hand, it contained some sort of liquid which she assumed must be alcohol. She thought excessively in an attempt to distract her mind from how nervous she was feeling.

Tully had been practising what to say to Negan for hours. She created a speech on what she would say to him in regards to her leaving him and giving up her status as his wife. However, as soon as she stepped inside his bedroom, she cannot get herself to utter a single word from her rehearsed speech.

"How are the girls?" he asked her, completely unaware that she planned to leave him that evening.

"They're asleep," she replied quickly. He nodded his head and got up from his seat. She wanted to tell him that she no longer wanted to be his wife. However, when she can't get herself to utter a single more word, she thought that she was better off turning around and leaving the room. There was something distinct about Negan that was making her feel weird. The man, brimming with confidence, left his seat and slowly trudged towards her with one of his hands inside the front pocket of his trousers while his other hand held his glass tumbler. Tully knew it was now or never, she had to turn around, unlock the door and flee if she cannot get the words she wanted to say out of her mouth…the problem was, she was completely frozen. It was as if Negan's intense gaze left her like that.

"And how are you?" he asked her, completely oblivious that her mind was racing and she was having an inner battle inside her head. Why can't she do the things her mind was desperately asking her to do?! Why can't she tell him she wanted to leave him? Why can't she run for her life?

"Fine," she replied curtly. She didn't say that she was far from fine, that she was nervous and somehow afraid, that she wanted so badly to leave him and stop being his stupid wife. His eyes seem to twinkle with delight. He was in the most cheerful mood she had ever seen him. She didn't know whether he asked her the question to taunt her or whether he was really concerned about her wellbeing, he just sounded so sincere but she knew that there was nothing trustworthy about him, even the tone of his voice.

Negan stopped in front of her. He was intimidatingly tall. She could almost feel the heat that radiated from his body. That was how close he was to her. "Don't be fucking nervous, Candy," he told her smoothly. "You look very tensed, here, have a drink," he said with a dimpled smile on his face as he handed her the glass tumbler he held.

Tully knew right there and then that there was no way she could escape the situation. Not only was her brain malfunctioning due to the fact that she cannot get herself to do the one thing she told herself she was going to do before she stepped inside his room, she also knew that it was a bad idea to make an intimidating man like Negan angry while locked inside his room with him. She made the conscious decision to be his wife so now she had to put her big-girl-pants on and face her fate. She inhaled sharply as she took the liquor he was offering her. She might as well have some of it if it will help her feel better about the situation.

Negan was smiling as he watched her drink the contents of the glass tumbler greedily, leaving none for him. She was very nervous, he could tell. He took the empty glass from her cold, shaky hand and left it on the bedside table before he returned to the spot where he stood earlier in front of her. Without warning, he reached forward and began to unbutton her shirt. Tully stood frozen in front of him, her heart was racing.

"I have AIDS," she blurted out, unsure how she even managed to speak when her lips were trembling so much. Negan stopped what he was doing and looked at her with furrowed brows and then, much to her mortification, he burst out laughing. In the midst of her nervousness and fear, Tully blurted out a lie. Of course, she didn't have AIDS but Negan didn't know that. "I'm serious," she continued with the lie. Perhaps lying could get her out of her current situation.

"No you don't," he grinned, obviously Negan wasn't easily fooled, "but if you do, I don't fucking care, we're all going to die in this new fucking world anyway so I might as well have a good time with a bombshell like you, Candy," he cackled. He gave the top of her head a pat as if she was a dog. "Nice try though, Candy, you deserve a fucking award for it and maybe you will," he said, winking at her. Her stomach churned at the idea that the so-called 'award' involved something sexual. It wasn't that Tully was a prude, it was just that she feared her inexperience would make her a laughing stock. Negan had lots of wives in his harem and he was clearly sexually active and experienced, the same cannot be said for her. Perhaps that was the main reason why she dreaded spending the night with Negan the most. The furthest sexual activity she was involved with was getting fingered at a sorority party during college. Negan would probably laugh or worse, humiliate her if he discovers her inexperience. He continued unbuttoning her shirt and Tully's heart continued to race to the point where she found it hard to breath.

"You made the fucking choice, Candy, I didn't fucking force you to be my wife. You made that choice because a part of you wanted to me with me. Am I right?" he looked at her, expectantly waiting for an answer.

Tully's dark brown eyes found his eyes. "Yes," she forced the single word out of her mouth. He was making it clear that she brought this all to herself, that he had nothing to do with her current situation. He was making it clear that she consented all of what's about to happen to her and that he wasn't the bad guy.

 *****Warning : MILD EXPLICIT CONTENT BELOW*****

"Good," Negan smiled as he slipped her shirt off her body. "I knew you fucking like me," arrogantly, he claimed. "I'm not going to fucking lie, Candy. I'm very attracted to you," he said. A soft gasp escape her lips as her bra followed her shirt on the floor, leaving her completely half naked in front of him. Almost automatically, Tully covered her breasts with her hands, earning a laugh from Negan. He reached forward and pulled her hands away from her breasts. "Don't be shy, Candy, let your husband appreciate you in all your fucking glory," he grinned. Tully's stomach churned as Negan whistled at the sight of her naked breasts.

She felt his warm, calloused hands on her skin. Tully tried her hardest not to shiver. He closed the little gap between them and Tully felt him hook his left arm around her waist. Their bodies were suddenly pressed together as he lowered his head to press a kiss on the curve of her neck. More kisses were planted on the side of her neck as Tully felt his right hand grab one of her breasts. He squeezed it and fondled it, leaving Tully trembling and trying her hardest not to moan. She didn't want him to know that she was enjoying it even if the signs were there. While she still felt very nervous, there was a part of Tully that was starting to feel eager and excited as result of her heightening arousal.

"You're fucking turned on, Candy," he stated proudly as he fondled her erect nipple with his fingers. Tully blushed madly. She was already embarrassed that her body was betraying her but as soon as Negan pointed it out, she felt worse. "Let's see how turned on you really are," he murmured against her skin as his right hand abandoned her breast. It travelled down south and crept inside her pants. Negan felt her quiver as he snuck his hand inside her panties and smirked. "Fuckity fuck, Candy," he laughed as he felt the moist spot between her legs with his fingers, "you're cunt's fucking wet. It's fucking dripping!" Grinning, he pulled his hand out of her pants and Tully watched with a burning face as he brought it up to his mouth for a taste. His brown eyes found hers. "You taste just as sweet as candy," he grinned.

He proceeded to undo the rest of her clothes, leaving Tully completely naked. Negan looked at the marvellous sight before him with an appreciative smile on his face. It was as if he was some teenage boy who had never seen a naked woman before. He nodded towards the bed behind him and Tully knew that the moment has come for them to consummate their so-called "marriage".

Later that evening, Negan was woken up by the sound of someone sniffling. He opened his eyes and found Tully sitting at the end of the bed away from him and still stark naked. Her long, dark hair covered her face but he could tell she was crying, not only by the sound of her quiet sniffles but also by the way her body trembled. His gaze shifted away from her weeping form and towards the red stains on the sheets. "Are you in pain, Candy?" he asked, alerting her that he had woken up.

Instantly, her sniffling stopped. "No," her husky voice replied simply.

"If you told me you were a virgin, I would've been gentler when I first rammed my fucking giant cock inside you. It's not my fucking fault if I tore your fucking pussy in half," he exclaimed, refusing to take responsibility for her tears. She crawled back to bed and proceeded to lay on the spot next to him with her back facing him. "Or were you saving your virginity for _the_ one?" he mused, almost mockingly.

"You talk too much," she murmured quietly, "and I'm not saving it for anyone so don't flatter yourself, I just never had the time to get rid of it," she added, assuring herself about it more than him. "Good night, Negan."

 *****end of explicit content*****

* * *

The next day Negan woke up alone in the bed. The side of the bed where Tully was some hours ago was now empty. He got up and left the bed, feeling refreshed after a pleasant night and saw that her clothes were missing on the floor. He figured she managed to escape from his arms some time during the morning. Sleepily, he got himself dressed and left the room afterwards to search for his brand new wife.

When he entered the room Tully shared with the girls, Negan found Jamie, Carly and Molly fast asleep on their makeshift bed. Carly's and Molly's arms and most of their faces were covered in bandages and it was the first time Negan saw the girls after the accident in the kitchen. With no sign of Tully in the room, Negan left the sleeping girls. His wandering feet led him to the bustling kitchen where instantly, he spotted a familiar petite woman slaving away in the kitchen. She stood out quite distinctly in the room and she was the first thing Negan saw as soon as he stepped inside. Negan was stumped to see her spending her early morning in the kitchen. She was now his wife and as part of his harem, she now had privileges, which include being exempted from the point system of the Sanctuary. It was intriguing to see her working in the kitchen as if she was till trying to earn points to afford her daily needs in the Sanctuary. It certainly wasn't surprising since she was the type of woman to do such a thing and Negan was only even more impressed.

His presence earned the attention of some of the other kitchen workers and it only took a few seconds before the busy Tully finally sensed Negan's presence in the kitchen. "What the hell are you doing in here?" he finally asked her.

Tully looked a little sheepish. She wiped her hands clean using her apron and grabbed a hold of his arm. She dragged him out of the kitchen and away from everyone's earshot. "Look Negan, I thought about things hard and I decided that the whole thing about being your wife is not for me." This time, she had more courage than she did last night and Tully was more than relieved to get the words out of her mouth without stuttering.

"Fuck, Candy, you haven't even been my wife for 24 fucking hours yet and you're already divorcing me?"

She bit her lower lip nervously, her earlier confidence was now fading. "Well, yes, if that's the simple way to put it then yes, I am divorcing you," she confirmed. All Negan could do at that very moment was laugh at her.

"Was my dick too fucking small for your liking, Candy?" he leaned over to her and asked with a playful little smirk on his face. "Or was it too fucking big for you to handle?"

Tully was speechless. She didn't quite know how to respond to his words. "Negan, I don't want to be your wife anymore," she said instead. He expected her say those words from a mile away. As soon as she made the decision yesterday, he knew that she was going to change her mind as quickly as she made it. However, Negan prepared himself for such situation. "I know that you don't force women to be your wife. I'm prepared to lose my privileges and go back to working for points," she explained.

"Ah, Candy," he smiled, "that's not how things fucking work around here. You can't be my fucking wife for a day and change your fucking mind the next day. You have to wait for the thirty-day trial to fucking pass," Negan informed her smugly. Tully looked at him in complete shock and horror. Sherry never mentioned anything about a thirty-day trial! "Don't be sad, Candy, I know you had fun last night," he winked, "you were moaning my fucking name if I recall it correctly. How many times did I make you cum again with just my fucking tongue? Three, four? I'm more than fucking sure that you'll stay with me after that thirty-day trial is over," he claimed arrogantly, winking at her and cackling to himself as Tully glared at him in disgust.

"I hate you," she muttered under her breath.

"Careful, Candy, hate is a very strong word and if I recall correctly, I made you eat your words once, I'm sure I can do it again," claimed Negan. "I've been told that I grow on people and I know I'm starting to grow on you. You know what they say about getting attached to the person you lose your virginity to. Besides, I know you also find me panty-drenchingly-rugged-as-fuck handsome," he grinned like a Cheshire cat, looking arrogant and brimming with confidence.

"Oh please," scoffed the red-faced Tully, "don't flatter yourself!"

Negan cackled at the blushing woman's attempt to deny his accusation about her feelings for him. "You can deny it all you like but your eyes say 'fuck me until your dick breaks off inside me'," he mused, leaving Tully not only blushing but also speechless. She never met a man with so much ego…ever.

* * *

 **Can i just say that a couple of negan's cocky dialogue above are from the comics when he was trying to flirt with this chick called alpha. i gotta admit, comic book negan is growing on me. anyways, i hope you guys enjoyed this chapter, it's one of my favourites only because of flirty negan. I really hope Jeffrey Dean Morgan will be just as flirty on screen, thousands of ovaries will probably explode ;-D**

 **anyways, i'd like to hear/read what you guys think so don't forget to drop a REVIEW :)**


	11. Chapter 11

The window rattled as a strong gust of wind blew outside. Wide-awake in the very late hours of the evening, Tully lay on her side and stared blankly at the door. Her back faced Negan who was lying on his back next to her. He was looking at the ceiling with a bright, jovial smile on his face. Wordlessly, he rolled on his side and held her possessively in his arms. They were so close that they could feel each other's heat and smell each other's distinct scents. Her back was touching Negan's chest and somehow, they fit perfectly like spoons in a drawer.

"Candy," she heard him murmur against her skin, "get yourself dressed," he ordered her as he released her from his grasp. He was the one who left the bed first and she wordlessly followed his order as he was getting dressed.

"I want you to come with me," he offered her his hand. Awkwardly, Tully reached forward after getting herself dressed and immediately, her much smaller hand was engulfed in his big, warm, calloused hand. He led her out of the room. She didn't say anything and just let him lead the way to wherever it was he wanted to bring her to.

They climbed several stairs. The building was quiet. It was late and most of the residents of the Sanctuary were asleep with the exception of the people taking the nightshift to guard the compound. Soon, Tully realised that Negan had taken her to the building's rooftop. There were two guards in the roof top doing the night shift and Negan motioned for them to leave. With no questions asked, both men left.

"What are we doing here?" she asked as the cold evening temperature welcomed her. Goosebumps instantly covered her arms as the thin fabric of her shirt did nothing to protect her from the chilliness. Negan immediately took notice of the fact that she was shivering from the cold and proceeded to remove his black, leather jacket. He placed it over her shoulder and his act surprised Tully who chose to remain quiet and say nothing about it. His jacket was warm from his own body heat and it bore his scent, the smell of leather and musk. He offered her his hand again and now a little less reluctant, Tully reached forward and allowed him to lead her to the chair that one of the guards had been using. He left her momentarily to fetch the other chair from the other side of the rooftop before he settled down next to her.

"This place is the most peaceful place in the Sanctuary," he told her, "I come here to think sometimes."

She looked ahead of her. He didn't exactly give an answer to her question and she chose not to pursue it anymore. She was exhausted, physically, mentally and recently emotionally as well. She had only been Negan's wife for a couple of days and she was already exhausted. Her only comfort was that in 28 days, she would be free to leave him. Above them, the dark, navy sky was adorned with sparkling stars. Some were just dots but a few were a little bigger and they shone brightly with the crescent moon accompanying them. Tully somehow understood why Negan considered the place as the most peaceful place in the Sanctuary because it was. It almost felt like they were in a completely different place.

"I got you something," Negan disturbed the silence as he reached for something from the back pocket of his trousers. Tully watched him take out a small velvet box. He handed it over to her and rather awkwardly, she took it from his hand. "I owe my hot wife a wedding present so here it is." He grinned at her as he watched her open the box.

She looked at the content of the box before she looked back at him. She was stunned. Material items such as jewellery no longer held the same value it did before in the new world they live in. Wherever Negan found the ring inside the box, Tully couldn't care less. What struck her was the ring itself. The box contained a white pearl ring.

"Thank you," she looked back at his smiling face. Somehow, he didn't look smug or cocky. Instead, he seemed genuinely pleased, not with himself but to hear the sincerity in her voice.

"Do you like it?" Negan asked. He tucked a strand of stray hair behind her ear and noticed the white pearl earrings she currently wore. She had those pearl earrings since the very first time they met.

Tully smiled softly. "How did you know I like pearls?" she wondered then she automatically cupped the earrings she was wearing, realising it must be how he figured it out. "It's my birthstone," she explained. "My Dad bought these earrings for me as a present when I graduated college," she told him, smiling at the memory. "He passed away a month after my graduation, he'd been suffering from cancer and Mom always told me that he was only holding on to see me graduate." For a moment, she didn't see the man next to her as Negan, the conniving man she should be wary of but instead, she saw him as an ear willing to listen to her. She hasn't talked about her father's death to anybody outside the family. None of her friends ever found out about the death from her directly. She didn't exactly know why she was telling him things about herself that even her girls were unaware of.

"Cancer stinks, doesn't it," he mumbled, letting out a humourless chuckle. "My wife passed away from cancer too," he revealed. Tully knew in that very moment that he wasn't talking about any of his wives in the Sanctuary…he was talking about his _real_ wife, the woman he had been married to most likely before the dead started to rise.

"I'm sorry to hear that," she found herself telling him, she was genuinely sincere. She knew what it felt like first hand to lose someone due to terminal illness. Negan simply shrugged, acting as if the very thought of his wife didn't affect him too much. "What was her name?" she found herself asking.

He glanced at her direction and looked at her hard. Tully could feel the intensity of his gaze on her and it made her feel like he was peering into her soul with his gaze. "Lucille." The hairs on the back of Tully's neck rose after hearing him utter the name he would affectionately refer to his baseball bat wrapped in barbed wire. She should've known that the name he had given his bat had some sort of story behind it. "She was a beautiful woman," stated Negan, "not as beautiful as you, Candy, if you want me to be honest but she had a heart of gold. I fucking loved her."

It was almost strange to hear Negan reveal such information about his past. Tully may not know a lot of things about Negan but her gut feeling told her that she was one of the few people, if not the only one, who knew about Lucille. She also sensed that Negan would not let anybody else see him in his vulnerable state as he reminisced his old life and his deceased wife. She looked at him quietly and saw a helpless, sad man.

"You miss her," she stated as she continued to look at him. He said nothing and by the expression on his face, he didn't want to talk about it. "It's okay to miss people, Negan," she told him, she didn't exactly know why she was assuring him about it. Why should she even care about him or his feelings? "I miss my family more and more each day. I'd wake up everyday and wonder why they all died and why I'm still here. It's a normal thing, I suppose, to miss the dead and to miss the old lives we took for granted before the world ended." Clearing her throat, Tully decided to divert the topic of their conversation after sensing that the conversation about his deceased wife was an uncomfortable topic for Negan who hasn't spoken at all for the past few minutes. Tully considered his silence as a bad sign given how talkative Negan typically was. "Thank you, by the way. The ring is very pretty although you don't have to get me anything."

"I fucking didn't," he denied as he turned his gaze away from her. "I only found them lying around." He watched her from the corner of his eyes as she placed the pearl ring back in the box. Somehow, he began to anticipate what she was going to say to him about the ring even before she could open her mouth to speak.

"I can't really wear this," she told him. Negan was expecting her to lecture him about how they were not technically married in a legal sort of way or bring up whatever bullshit thing she learned from her women's studies class in college or some other bullshit like that.

"Why fucking not?" he turned to look at her with his eyebrow raised. He was expecting her to challenge him and he was prepared to respond back to whatever witty words she was about to say. She was his wife after all and he was also her leader which meant he had authority over her.

"Well," she smiled, "it doesn't really fit me, it's too small." His frown momentarily faltered. Of course, she ended up saying something that he wasn't expecting her to say.

For a split second, Negan felt sheepish. He cleared his throat and got up from his seat. Tully looked up at him and her eyes followed him as he trudged to the exit, leaving her behind in the rooftop. She thought he left her behind and she was about to decide that she should leave as well when he came back. He took the ring from her and when he handed it back to her, the ring was on a string.

"Problem solved," he looked at her with a grin. Their gazes clashed and Tully found herself smiling back at him. She allowed him to place the make-shift necklace he got for her around her neck with the pearl ring dangling as a pendant. It was obvious that as long as she wore her supposed wedding ring, she was marked as Negan's.

* * *

 **hey guys, i hope you all liked this chapter. i'm sorry if it's a bit short, don't worry next chapter will be longer**

 **anyways, please leave a REVIEW**

 **and one last thing, a reader asked whether the girls are exempted from the point system, the answer is yes (that's one of the reasons why tully agreed because it was a part of negan's initial offer)...but tully still works/do some chores because she wanted to and you'll see that next chapter (i think)...hope that clear things up & thanks for the feedback :)**


	12. Chapter 12

*** **Warning : MILD ADULT THEMES/ MATURE CONTENT below**

* * *

By now, most of the Sanctuary's residents were aware that Negan had taken another wife. For a change, his new wife was not a wife or a girlfriend of any of his men. His new wife was certainly different from his other wives. Not only did she refuse to dress herself in the skimpy attire that Negan wanted the women in his harem to wear, she also refused to sit around in the wives' quarters and do nothing all day. Although she didn't have to earn points anymore, Tully still did chores. The chore she was particularly involved in was meal preparation. Negan's simple reason for allowing her to work in the kitchen in particular was that the food was horrible whenever she didn't make it. Jenny, Sarah and the other kitchen workers seemed to have such basic imagination when cooking and often served the most bland food that Negan and many of the Saviors learned to hate. Therefore, by popular demand, Tully was back in the kitchen. She didn't mind. In fact, she loved doing work. She discovered immediately that not doing anything at all left her bored and Tully hated being bored.

She dedicated most of her new free time with her girls too. Molly and Carly were healing slowly from their burns and Jamie was always around to help Tully. Tully used her privileges to acquire things easily for the girls, including items of entertainment value such as books to keep them entertained during long days. The word about her involvement with Negan still hasn't reached her girls and Tully wished that it never will because she was quite unsure how to explain it to any of them.

"My arms are itchy," Molly claimed one morning as Tully applied some ointment on her healing burns.

"That means it's healing, honey," Tully reassured the girl. "Is that the same for yours, Carly?" she asked the other girl who lay on their makeshift bed with a comic book in her hand.

"I saw her peeling off her skin earlier," Jamie claimed, revealing Carly's activities that Tully was unaware of.

"Carly don't do that please, you're going to irritate it and it might cause some infection," she reminded the child.

The girls were unaware of the presence of the person standing outside their room and peering through the slightly opened door. However, when Negan stepped inside the room without knocking, the girls saw him immediately and happily greeted him while their mother, who was now busy folding their clothes, realized he had entered the room.

"Damn, you girls look shitty, those are some ugly burns," Negan claimed as Tully looked at him with a scowl. He saw it and appeared guilty all of the sudden. "I didn't mean that in an insulting sort of way, I was just stating the fucking obvious," he added immediately, addressing Tully to explain himself.

"What are you doing here?" she asked him, a little annoyed that he invaded the one room in the whole entire building where she could be away from him.

"I came to say goodbye," Negan explained. The girls asked immediately where he was going and Negan proceeded to explain animatedly that he needed to kick some walker ass. This seemed to satisfy the girls but it left Tully intrigued. She was certain that Negan and his men weren't going out to collect more supplies since it hasn't been long since they collected some. She wondered quickly where he was actually going and what he would be doing. She hated that she knew very little about the Savior's activities apart from the fact that they collect their supplies from other groups who owed them. She didn't even know why they owed them.

"Okay," Tully murmured as she returned back to the task at hand. At least she would be away from him for a while, she saw that as a very good thing. She needed a break from him.

"Aren't you going to give me a fucking goodbye kiss?" he asked Tully, instantly causing her to pause and stop what she was doing. She turned to look at him, she was completely horrified that he was going to tell the girls about 'them'. "I'm fucking kidding," he laughed. She had never felt so relieved. She was not really ready to tell her girls about her new status as a wife. "Why don't you look after your sisters for a few minutes Jamie, I need to speak with your mother," he told Jamie before nodding at Tully and obediently, she followed without a word.

Tully followed Negan to his office and as soon as they both entered the room, he shut it noisily behind him and clicked the lock. Negan reached forward and cupped her chin with his hand before he forced his tongue inside her mouth. She allowed him to kiss her because it was now her duty as his wife to let him do such a thing. While Negan was the type of man who made it clear that he would stop if she was uncomfortable, something about his rough kiss only enticed Tully rather than turn her off. He removed his lips off of hers to allow himself to catch his breath and for her to do the same. However, before Tully could recover from it, Negan reached for one of her hands resting on her side and relocated it on his crotch. Her stunned brown eyes immediately looked up at his own brown eyes questioningly.

With a smile on his face, he leaned forward and pressed his lips against her ear while he continued to rub her hand against his crotch. She could feel his hard erection against her palm and it made her very nervous. "I'm going to fucking miss you, Candy," he whispered in her ear huskily, "so why don't you give me a nice goodbye blowjob, huh?" although she could not see his face, she knew he was smiling from ear to ear while he spoke against her ear.

Wordlessly, Tully fulfilled his request and got down on her knees until his crotch was right in front of her face. She could see the tent between his legs that his erection was causing and it only made Tully's heart flutter harder against her chest. The room was completely silent as Tully's shaky hands traced down the line of his zipper. She paused momentarily to look up at his face and it was during that moment that she caught him watching her, rapt, as she shakily pulled his zipper down while looking up at his face. His pants were soon on the floor along with his underwear.

"You know what to do, Candy," his voice was thick and husky with lust as he taunted her. There was a smile of utter satisfaction on Negan's face as he felt her warm, shaky hands gently reach for his hard length. The evidently nervous woman leaned forward until Negan could feel her ragged, fast breaths against his throbbing cock. He was waiting impatiently and the fact that she was taking her time to do the deed was beginning to irk him but he said nothing about it.

She heard the air shot out of his mouth the moment her tongue came in contact with the warm, velvety flesh she held in her hands. She could smell his strong, musky scent as her tongue ran up and down his length. She could taste him and her head was spinning while her heart throbbed faster. Then, Tully guided his dick inside her mouth. At one point, she had to open her mouth wider to accommodate for his size. As soon as he was inside her mouth, Tully felt like she was in control. She was the one giving him pleasure this time and for that reason, she had the power over him. It was up to her whether to suck his dick hard enough that it will give him an explosive orgasm or whether to refuse sucking his cock and prevent his hopes for a mind-boggling orgasm. Tully ended up doing the former. She wasn't exactly sure why but he sucked his cock like what he asked her to do. Perhaps she was only fulfilling her duty as a wife…that's what Tully made herself believe at least.

All Negan did throughout the entire time she was giving him the blowjob he requested was watch her commit the act. At one point, he grabbed a handful of her hair and pushed her head against him until he could feel the back of her throat with his prick. Her mouth was hot and her tongue was tantalizing. Not once did she gagged let alone gave up. When he was done and he exploded his seed inside her mouth, he watched in satisfaction as she swallowed his load without a single pip. She was good and Negan was impressed. He never even imagined that a woman like her, who was a virgin before him, would be a terrific cocksucker. The very idea that she had done it to someone else before him suddenly irritated Negan a little. How many dicks had she sucked before he came in her life? The very idea that _his_ Candy was someone else's before was annoying to Negan. However, as he zipped up his trousers while watching her fix her hair, Negan's gaze dropped to the necklace she wore around her neck. He stared at the pearl ring pendant and felt better about himself. She may have been someone else's before him but she was his' now.

* * *

Negan was gone for a number of days. Tully's life went on. She had gotten used to spending each night in Negan's room that it felt odd sleeping in her own room again. She was so used to being pulled by Negan on random occasions throughout the day and dragged to whatever empty room they could find that it felt a little odd not to be stalked by him anymore. She thought that she would be the happiest person in the compound while he was gone but Tully never expected herself to actually miss him. She almost hated herself for it. She told herself several times that she missed the sex since that was all she and Negan often did whenever they were together. While the admission made her feel like a slut, it was better than acknowledging the fact that it was Negan's presence she missed and not his dick. She was too proud to admit that. In fact, she didn't even understand why she missed him at all.

To occupy herself and distract herself from thoughts of Negan, Tully dedicated plenty of her time with her girls. She also took a number of chores to avoid ever getting bored. One time, Tully paid the quarters that housed Negan's other wives a visit while she was collecting the laundry. They seemed welcoming and much friendlier.

Tully stayed in the room longer than anticipated when she found herself asking Eve, one of Negan's wives, to give her a haircut after Amber who was getting her hair trimmed by Eve. Eve was a hairdresser back when the world was a much better place. Eve gave her a haircut and rather hesitantly followed Tully's request when she asked to have most of her long waist-length hair chopped off.

"You have such nice long hair, why do you want it cut shorter?" Eve asked out loud, clearly she envied Tully's long, healthy dark hair.

"I'm tired of it," she replied simply, "besides, it takes too much effort to wash." Eve laughed and agreed.

"Yes, you're right." Some of the other women in the room were busy playing cards and smoking. Tully often wondered how they can never get bored of their lifestyle.

"So how are you and Negan doing? Is he treating you well?" Amber asked.

"Fine, we're doing fine," came Tully's very vague reply.

"Has he slept with you yet?" Amber continued to ask, "he hasn't slept with any of us for weeks. I find it weird." This new information stunned Tully. Negan and her had been having sex whenever possible since they consummated their "marriage" so it was quite surprising to hear the revelation from Amber.

"Once, the day I became a wife," Tully lied. She was afraid to be judged by these women if she revealed to them that Negan and her had been having sex like rabbits since she became his wife.

The women believed her. "Where did he slept with you? Negan usually sleeps with whoever he chooses to sleep with in this room and he sends the rest of us away."

"I-In his room," Tully's response earned several stunned glances from the other wives. They were amazed and intrigued at the same time. "Why? Is that bad?" she asked.

"Honey," laughed Amber, "no one has ever been to Negan's bedroom before. You're clearly his current favorite." This statement made Tully blush. She hated the fact that the revelation also made her a little pleased with herself. "Hey, Sherry, looks like you're not Negan's number one girl anymore," exclaimed the woman, turning to Sherry who was busy playing cards.

Tully's eyes met Sherry's. "Good," she said, smiling at Tully. There was no jealousy or hatred in her eyes and it left Tully stumped. Instead, Sherry seemed relieved that she was no longer the apple of Negan's eyes. It only proved her suspicion more that the woman was still in love with her actual husband, Dwight.

"Negan likes to take Sherry to bed before you came along because he knows it hurts Dwight's ego," claimed Eve. Sherry's smile faltered and the woman looked away from Tully. She knew that Sherry didn't like the way the other wives talked about Dwight. It left her stunned that despite how much Sherry was still in love with her real husband, she hasn't done anything to return to him and leave Negan. It only proved the fact that Negan was a master of control and manipulation…even Sherry's love for Dwight cannot break the trap that Negan had entrapped Sherry in. Tully knew that like Sherry and the other wives, she too was stuck in the same trap…well, until her thirty days with him finishes.


	13. Chapter 13

"Where's Candy?" that was Negan's first question as soon as he set foot inside the Sanctuary after being absent for three long days.

"I-I'm not sure," admitted the man that guarded the front door of the building.

Negan turned to one of his men with him. He held Lucille in his right hand and Lucille was mostly covered in blood. "Find Candy and tell her that I need to fucking speak to her," he ordered one of them before making his way to his bedroom.

A few minutes later and Tully was knocking on Negan's door. There was no response for the next couple of minute that passed so she let herself in. By the sound of the running water, she assumed he was in the built in bathroom connected to his room. He was the only one in the compound with his very own private bathroom. Tully closed the door behind her as she noticed his boots left behind on the floor, it was as if he had kicked out of it on his way to the bathroom. She picked them up and placed them next to the bed. She noticed Lucille resting against the wall and instantly took note of the blood that stained the bat. She assumed it was walker blood…she hoped it was walker blood.

Before she could investigate, Tully noticed that the water stopped running and the bathroom door soon opened. Negan, who had a white towel wrapped around the lower half of his body, stepped out. Negan was several years her senior and for a man his age, he was still very fit physically. He smiled when he noticed her presence in the room but there was something about her that instantly made his smile falter.

"What the fuck have you done to your hair?" he asked her instantly. He had been used to seeing her with her long, dark hair usually tied back in a messy braid. However, now it seemed that she had butchered her long hair. She had cut it so much shorter, her straight frizzy hair was much frizzier than it was before with her new haircut. It reached just below her chin and she kept it clear from her face with a makeshift headband made out of a strip of cloth. Her heart-shaped face was more prominent now with her new hairdo and it accentuated her slender neck.

"What about my hair?" came her monotonous response as she looked at him with an unimpressed expression on her face.

"You look like a fucking teenage boy," Negan commented. She crinkled her nose.

"Good," she muttered sarcastically as she folded her arm across her chest, letting Negan know that he was about to get some of her sass, "I'm glad you feel that way Negan. In fact, it's very comforting. Now that I look less like a woman, I hope that you won't have sex with me anymore."

She looked smug. She clearly thought she had won that round with her wit. "You're still fucking hot with or without long hair, Candy. Hell, I'd still fuck you with no hair," he clarified, "and stop pretending you don't fucking like it when I fuck you," laughed Negan as he approached her. He stopped in front of her and Tully could smell the soap he used. "I know I'm the best fucking lover you've ever had in your entire life. I bet I was the only one who ever made you cum," arrogantly, he claimed as he winked at her flirtingly.

Tully frowned. She took his little comment as an insult. "Of course I orgasmed many times before," she told him haughtily. "Don't flatter yourself, before you came along, I was pretty satisfied with my fingers and I still am…" her voice trailed off as she realized what just came out of her mouth in the midst of her frustration. She shut her mouth tight almost instantly and looked at him with her face a very bright shade of red.

Negan was laughing. She was sure he was laughing at her or maybe at the stupid words she recklessly spat out or maybe at both. "Well, I'm fucking offended," he feigned an expression of disappointment. "If your fingers are doing a better job than my dick then I must be doing something wrong," he shook his head but the twinkle in his eyes remained. "Thank you for your precious feedback, Candy. Any-fucking-way, if I remember correctly, you forgot to give me a welcome home kiss or an I'm glad you're back blowjob," he continued.

Tully looked up at him with her cheeks still burning. Something about his little demand struck her. During the days that he had been gone, she learned plenty from her sister wives. Not only was she the only girl Negan had been sleeping with lately or the only one who had ever been to his room but she was also the only one amongst his wives that he had kissed. He never kissed any of the other women before, not even during sex. Tully found it intriguing too that he would often ask her to initiate the kiss.

"Do you really want to kiss someone who looks like a teenage boy?" she asked him, using his early words to mock him. How she even managed to recover from her earlier blunder, she had no idea but she saw an opportunity to attack and she seized it.

Negan grinned, his dimples appeared automatically. He was clearly unaffected by her attempts to mock him. "I was fucking kidding. Your hair looks hot," he chuckled, "you don't have to be fucking offended all the time." Before she could come up with a retort, he pressed his lips against hers. He kissed her hungrily, enjoying what he had been missing during the days that he was gone.

"Now that my dick has considered your feedback, it's going to fuck you in a way that your fingers will never be able to," he told her dirtily. He clearly wanted to heal his bruised ego despite how certain he was that she had been lying earlier to offend him. She didn't really meant what she said about his sexual performance, he was almost sure of that but he wanted to prove himself anyway. In a matter of seconds, his towel was on the floor and was soon accompanied by Tully's clothes.

* * *

After spending the evening working in the kitchen voluntarily, Tully arrived back to her bedroom to send the girls to bed. She was stunned to see Negan in the room. He lay on the sleeping mat with the girls and he seemed busy animatedly telling them stories about his latest adventure on the road. He told them about the walkers he encountered and killed using Lucille. He recounted how gross they looked and smelled. He never mentioned a single thing that would reveal what he really did during the three days that he was gone with several of the Saviors and the girls seemed too satisfied listening to his overdramatic, animated stories about his encounter with the walkers to wonder out loud where exactly he had gone off to.

Tully watched the interaction for some time. Perhaps to an outsider, it was just a father spending quality time with his daughters. Negan seemed like a very great fatherly figure at that very moment. Even Tully suddenly found herself believing that maybe he wasn't that bad. Although he made it clear that the girls were not his responsibility but hers the day she caved in and accepted his offer to be his wife after rejecting her pleas to get medicine and pay for it later, Negan seem to care about the girls and just try not to show it so easily to anyone else, even to Tully. He didn't have kids of his own and Tully guessed that at one point in his life, he wanted to have some. Who knows, perhaps he still does.

"Okay, I think if you talk more about walker eyeballs and brains, Molly won't be able to sleep," she interrupted the storytelling.

"I'm not scared anymore, Mommy!" Molly exclaimed.

"Damn right you shouldn't be, you're mother's one hell of a badass lady so you should be too," Negan told the little girl as his eyes followed Tully as she trudged into the room. She removed her boots and proceeded to lie down on the other side of the mat, far away from Negan. She lay closest to Carly whom she began to cuddle with while Negan watched her quietly.

"Mom, Mr. Negan told us that he's our Dad now, is that true?" Jamie asked as she rolled over so that she could face Tully. This revelation made Tully glance at Negan with a scowl on her face. She should have expected him to tell the girls sooner than later and worse, behind her back.

"Yes, Negan and I are sort of married now which makes him a Dad to all you girls now whether he like it or not," Tully explained as she turned her gaze away from Negan's smug face and towards her girls.

"What a weird wedding," Jamie murmured, "I thought people get married in churches with big white gowns and tall cakes, like in the movies," she recounted.

"We live in the new world now, sweetheart, that shit doesn't happen anymore," clarified Negan. "Anyway, you're mother's Mrs. Negan now and you're all my kids now which means none of you have to work a single day in your lives here…unless of course, your Mom chooses to leave me," he explained. Tully frowned even more. Now he was bribing the girls. He clearly wanted them in his side by bribing them with the privileged life in the Sanctuary, which they can only have as long as she was a part of his harem.

"Don't divorce Mr. Negan, Mommy, I like having a Daddy. I never had a Daddy before," Molly turned to Tully with her little request. Negan further smirked once he heard the little girl's wish.

"As long as he's a good Dad to you, Carly and Jamie, I won't," Tully assured the little girl.

"But why does Mr. Negan have so many wives?" Carly wondered out loud. "Shouldn't you just love our Mom, Mr. Negan?" she asked the older man.

"He has a big heart, honey," explained Tully, coming to Negan's aid when he can't seem to come up with a good response to the child's question. "He has lots of wife because his heart is big enough to love all these different people," Tully explained while she sent glares towards Negan's way. He didn't seem to appreciate her lying to the girls for him. What was she meant to say? Was he expecting her to tell the girls the truth that he only have wives for one reason and one reason only and it's a three letter word that spelt S-E-X? "It's time for all you girls to go to sleep, it's pretty late," Tully ended up calling it a no longer wanted to talk to the girls about the whole marriage thing with Negan and her sister wives.

A few hours later and the room had gone completely quiet. Tully and Negan accompanied the girls until they have fallen asleep. Molly, who was closest to Negan had fallen asleep holding his hand and ever so gently, he removed his hand from her grasp with so much care so he would not wake her up or bump into her bandaged arms. Tully felt almost weird seeing Negan with her girls. He was the same man who pressed a scalding hot iron on the wrongly accused thief with very little mercy but at the same time, he was the man who made her girls giggle at funny yet gruesome jokes about walkers. It was like the two personas were completely different persons but just like an onion Negan had many layers.

"I'll meet you upstairs in a couple of minutes," he told her as he got up from the floor. Tully watched him leave before she proceeded to kiss her sleeping girls goodnight. She got up from the mat and slipped on her boots before making her way to the rooftop.

She saw Negan sitting in one of the chairs and watching the night sky above when she entered the rooftop. Quietly, Tully joined him and occupied the empty seat next to his' that she knew he left there for her. The guards were gone and she could only assume that he sent them away.

"Did you mean it?" he asked softly.

"Mean what?"

"When you said you won't leave me," he replied quickly.

"No, I said that I won't leave if you remain a good fatherly figure to the girls," Tully explained.

"So you won't leave me," he clarified confidently as he turned to look at her with a smile. She wasn't sure whether he looked relieved or delighted or maybe both.

"What makes you so confident that I won't?" Tully questioned him.

"Because I know I'll be the best father to those girls," arrogantly, he replied, "and I know for a fucking fact that you're captivated by me, Candy," he added with pride as he winked at her. Tully laughed at his arrogance.

"You wish," she chuckled.

A sudden moment of silence took over and Tully busied herself removing some dirt under her nails. There was nothing awkward about the silence they shared. In fact, it was rather serene and Tully knew that for Negan to be so quiet only meant he was currently thinking. While everything was quiet, she could not help but think about Negan's arrogant claim. She believed that she was not captivated by him but at the same time, she also believed that there was something attractive about the older man. Physically, there was nothing unappealing about Negan. She could tell that when he was her age, he was not only very attractive but that particular trait also made him a ladies man. Now that he was more mature, he aged like fine wine. He was still attractive and she would be lying if she denied that. He was fit, he had a beautiful, captivating smile, spellbinding eyes and although half the things that would come out of his mouth were swear words, he had a very attractive voice. His possible trait as a ladies' man during his younger years seem to stuck and it's proven by his fairly large harem which she was now a part of. He was an expert at charming women from the things that would come out of his mouth to how he would smile at them and there was certainly something about his animated personality that made him very charismatic.

However, Tully also knew that this very same man could be dangerous. He had henchmen who were willing to bend down to his will and follow his every command. He was a force not to be reckoned with. His often energetic personality would fool anyone into thinking that he wasn't very smart but in truth, Negan was far from dumb, he was a genius…a genius who liked to be in control.

"So why do you like to be called Tully?" he wondered out loud, suddenly breaking the silence. Whenever they were up in the rooftop, he would often ask her personal questions and Tully would often feel hesitant to reveal too much but Negan, as the manipulative genius that he was, would often leave the rooftop with plentiful of information that he would learn from her and she wouldn't even realize that she had revealed too much until the next day.

"It's my last name," came her simple response.

Negan laughed. "I fucking know that, I saw it on your driver's license," he told her. "You have a pretty name, Candice" he recounted, "why not use that?"

"The same reason you call me Candy, it's a mouthful," she told him. "I was a sprinter back when I was in high school and my track and field coach would call me Tully the Thunderbolt and I was stuck with the nickname from then on," she smiled at the recollection of memories. She hasn't looked back at the fun memories of her past for quite while now. Somehow, whenever they had their little talk in the rooftop, she would reminisce the life she had taken for granted before the world was something about Negan's companionship and the conversations they would share, with him asking mostly about her life, that would prompt her to reminisce her past.

"So that's why you were too fucking fast for my men," Negan commented.

Tully looked at him and could not help but return the smile he had on his face. He looked so boyish with his dimpled smile. She thought that he wasn't so bad. In fact, the more time she spent with him, the more she get to know Negan's friendly persona. This Mister-Nice-Guy side of Negan was the reason why lately, she had been letting her guard down towards him. She was beginning to see him as someone she could recognize as a friend and perhaps even more than that. "Will you ever let me come with you and your men one day?" she asked him. She figured it was safe to bring up the question now that they have gotten to know each other very well. Her sudden question however, made his smile vanish. "I'm fast and I can use a gun pretty well, even a knife with walkers," Tully explained.

"Why the fuck would you want that?" he asked, cocking his eyebrow at her.

She didn't want to tell him that she wanted to tag along to see what really went on outside the Sanctuary and what exactly the Saviors' activities consisted off other than collecting supplies. Her curiosity about it was killing her slowly. She was starting to trust Negan but before she fully commit herself to him, she wanted to know who Negan really was and who she was dealing with for the safety of her girls. "It can get pretty darn boring being your wife here if you want me to be honest with you," she told him. She wasn't lying about it and he knew she was right. "I love spending a lot of time with my girls and helping out in the kitchen but I've been used to being out there for so long I guess that I sort of miss it."

Her reply stunned Negan. He was growing more and more impressed. It was certainly not what a typical woman would say. Anyone in his harem would never wish to get out of the Sanctuary but Tully was nothing like those women and that's why she was his favourite. "I'll think about it," Negan finally replied, leaving Tully very hopeful.


	14. Chapter 14

**hey everyone! sorry for the super late update**

 **anyways, i just wanna say a MASSIVE thank you to all of you lovely readers because this story has reached 10, 000 views wow, to some authors that's probably not much but i think that's a lot, i always get pretty happy when i reach the 5-digit number lol so thank you thank you thank you ( i always thought that this story won't be as successful and will be overshadowed by lots of daryl fanfics..who knew people like negan fanfics too! woo) ohhh and thanks for the lovely reviews too, keep em coming :)**

 **also, i know i've been a little slack when it comes to updating and i apologise, things have been a little hectic with my uni studies and i hope you all understand, i'll try to remember to update weekly tho just for you all...anyway, enough of my yapping, i hope you will all enjoy this chapter and let me know what ya'll think after**

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It was in the early hours of the morning when Negan woke up. The sky outside was still fairly dark and the sun hasn't risen up yet. He had woke up from the sound of Tully's voice. She had been saying one particular name in her sleep over and over again, Emily, she kept saying. She had her arms around him and her head resting at the little spot under his arm and next to his chest. Her tight embrace and her continual murmurs were the two reasons why Negan had woken up. It didn't annoy him however and since he couldn't go back to sleep anymore, Negan occupied himself watching Tully sleep. He didn't wake her up and was fairly glad he didn't when she finally relaxed in his arms a few minutes after he had woken up. She inched closer towards him until her face was buried on the side of his chest and Negan guessed that the nightmare she was having ended and perhaps turned into a pleasant dream. He watched her sleep for some time until the sun rose and the dark sky made way for the morning sky.

When Tully opened her hazy eyes later she instantly realized that she had been cuddling with Negan in her sleep. Immediately, she sat up with no recollection of the nightmare she had. She glanced over her shoulder and saw Negan, wide awake and watching her. For a change, she woke up fully clothed and so did he. They spent the night on the rooftop, talking. She talked more about herself as always. He carried her to his room eventually where they simply lied on the bed next to each other until sleep had taken over them.

"Good morning," she told him. However, before she could leave the bed, he hooked his arm around her waist and pulled her back down.

"Apparently, morning sex is the best. Should we find out?" he asked as he pressed his lips against her ear so she would not miss a single thing he said.

An hour later and Tully, slightly limping, made her way to the kitchen where she was running late for her chore. She was immediately busy with several tasks that had to be done in the kitchen in preparation for breakfast. After a morning spent with Negan, she was more tired than refreshed. For the remainder of the hour, she slaved away completing the chore she volunteered to do. Eventually, the dining area was bustling as the first group of people arrived for breakfast.

It was only a matter of time before Negan stepped in with three familiar girls with him. They approached Tully who was behind the counter. A little part of her was somehow glad that Negan was taking care of her girls. She was beginning to believe that he was serious about being a father to them. Of course it wasn't just Tully who was beginning to take note of Negan's soft spot towards the three youngest citizens of the Sanctuary, a lot of people simply assumed that he was simply doing it so that his new wife would stay with him, a type of strategy to control her while others assumed that the man, like many, still wanted to be a parent in the new world they lived in.

"At least one of us look freshly showered and clean," Tully commented at the sight of Negan. His slicked back hair looked damp and he looked more presentable than he did earlier in bed.

"Is that a new way to say what a fucking handsome mother fucker I am?" he grinned at her. Tully rolled her eyes and snatched the tray off his hands. She turned her attention to her girls and asked them if they slept well last night.

"Mr. Negan and I are playing ping-pong after breakfast!" Molly exclaimed excitedly after the girls assured Tully that they slept fine.

Tully handed Negan his tray that was now filled with food. "Good, make a loser out of him, baby," Tully told the girl.

"With you as my fucking wife, I'll never be a fucking loser," chuckled Negan, flirting with her. His comment instantly made the apples of Tully's cheek turn into a bright shade of red. The girls giggled at his little compliment and it further made Tully blush. It seemed like Negan finally learned how to turn her little negative comments into something positive.

* * *

A few hours later, Tully carried the newly washed and folded laundry in her arms. It was early in the afternoon and she figured that she and the girls could do some reading. Although education now had less importance in the new world, Tully liked to keep her girls intellectually stimulated. She would use her privileges as Negan's wife to borrow books and collect writing materials from the supply room and use it with her girls. However, as she neared the room she shared with the girls, Tully immediately slowed down on her tracks upon hearing the girls familiar giggles from the room.

"You can't use rude words, !" she could hear Carly saying.

"And he even spelled 'fuck' with an a," laughed Jamie.

"I know how to fucking spell fuck," she could hear Negan's retort, "I don't have a 'u' here, see?"

When Tully stepped inside the room, she found Negan with the girls, they were playing Scrabble on the floor. It seemed like they were having such an intense game that no one even noticed Tully as the girls made it clear to Negan that he cannot use the word 'fack' because it was not a real word. Negan seemed defeated and he muttered a few colorful words as he accepted defeat, claiming how none of the letters he had could form any word.

Tully approached him and looked over his shoulder to see the letters he had. He had F, A, C, K and Y. "Don't be such a sore loser, Negan," she chuckled as she rearranged the letters. "You can do 'Fay' which means fairy if you don't know," she told him like he was a child, "or you can do 'Yak' which is a type of ox and you can even do 'Yack'."

Negan was looking at her the whole time as she rearranged his letters. She was clearly distracted that she did not saw it coming when he leaned over and pressed a kiss on her cheek. Instantly, Tully withdrew and glared at him. The girls were giggling and were making kissy noises.

"Great, now that my motherfucking secret weapon is here I'm going to finally win this fucking round," Negan exclaimed excitedly. "I'm back in the fucking game!" he seemed delighted that he hasn't lost yet. Tully, who was still blushing from his sneaky kiss, could only shake her head at his competitiveness.

Over the next weeks that followed, Negan's bond with the girls grew stronger. Tully would often see him spending time with the girls away from the prying eyes of the Sanctuary's citizens whenever he found some free time. At first, she thought that he was only doing it as a ruse, an act to fool her into believing that he cared for the girls so that she won't leave him when the thirty days finishes. However, the more she observed him with the girls, the more Tully began to realize that his friendship with the girls was genuine. He cared for the girls. He wouldn't be dedicating some time out of his day to spend with the girls if he didn't care about them.

As his bonding time with the girls increased, Tully and Negan also began to get to know each other even more. They would spend late evenings together on the rooftop, often talking about her life before the apocalypse. He seemed to enjoy hearing stories about her life. She told him about her childhood in Alaska where her parents were originally from, her college experience and even about her family. She didn't know exactly why and how Negan could get her to tell him things about herself so easily. However, he would listen to her stories intently and he seemed genuinely interested.

"Tell me about yourself," for once, Tully demanded, "it's always me doing the story-telling, why don't you do it for once," she claimed, earning a chuckle from Negan who didn't expect such demands from her.

"What do you want me to talk about?" he asked.

"You mentioned once that your wife died from cancer," Tully started, "tell me more about her, about Lucille." Negan was quiet for a minute of two and Tully began to worry. Did she accidentally open a wound that was still healing? Did her demands trigger some bad memories? "We don't have to talk about it if you're not comfortable," she decided to clarify when he hasn't responded to her demand.

Negan simply looked at her, he looked at her intently and Tully was the one who grew uncomfortable. His gaze made her feel like he can see inside her head. "I was a dick to Lucille before she died," Negan admitted, "I cheated on her constantly and I promised I'll change when she was diagnosed with cancer," he revealed, proving Tully's suspicion right that he was a womanizer. "You know what they say, you don't know what you fucking have until it's gone. It's motherfucking true," he chuckled humourlessly. "She was the only woman I ever loved, I just didn't know how to prove it to her and it was too late by the time I figured a way how to."

She reached for one of his hands and held it tightly, it was warm and calloused against her own hand. He said nothing anymore and she didn't ask him to continue recounting his past. Instead, they sat in silence together with her hand holding his' firmly. Their frequent late night conversations on the rooftop changed their 'marriage' completely. Before their frequent late night conversations started, their relationship revolved around sex. It made Tully assume that it was all he wanted from her. However, as the weeks passed and as they spend more and more time together on the rooftop, she started to feel like she misjudged him. She was beginning to doubt her earlier suspicion that all Negan wanted from her was sex. Lately, they would spent nights just talking and falling asleep next to each other without having sex and Tully took that as a sign that he was seeing her as more than just a woman who could give him pleasure. She was beginning to feel that he had genuine feelings for her. Her suspicion was further strengthened when she learned that he hasn't slept with any of his other wives since their 'marriage' and now, the fact that he opened up to her about Lucille made her feel like he trusted her more than the others.

There was no denying that Tully herself was developing feelings for Negan. It was very easy to be captivated by such a charming man. She hasn't been with many men before. She never found the time for a boyfriend and always found them to be high maintenance. However, Negan wasn't like any of the men of her past. He listened to her. He was mentally mature and smart. He was greedy for her affection, he was strong and he was confident. With him, she was never jaded. She surprisingly felt safer and well looked after. However, while she was getting charmed by Negan, the safety of her girls was still her priority. She might be slowly forgetting how controlling and misleading Negan could be and how much he preferred to be in control of everything as a leader but Tully has not forgotten her mission to make sure that the Sanctuary was indeed the best place for her girls. That mission includes finding out the Saviors activity outside the Sanctuary which until now, she was still unaware of.

A few nights later, Tully decided to check her luck with Negan once again. She was itching to learn about the Savior's activity after Negan and the Saviors returned from a trip with an abundant amount of supplies which she knew they couldn't possibly gather during the hours that they were gone. "So, have you thought about it?" she asked him that evening.

"About what?"

"Remember when I told you I want to come with you when you go out with your men?" she reminded him, "you said you will think about it. Have you?"

Negan rolled over so that his broad back was facing her. "Yeah, I've thought about it," he replied lazily, "I'm thinking of an answer somewhere along the lines of no motherfucking way." Tully frowned at him. Irritated at his response, she kicked him out of bed,literally. He fell off the bed like a log with a heavy thud and instantly, a series of profanities came out of his dirty mouth. "What the fuckity fuck was that fucking about?!"

"For being a dick," muttered Tully. She got out of bed and gathered her clothes on the floor, letting him know that she would not be sleeping with him on his bed for the evening.

"So I'm the motherfucking dick for acting as a caring husband and leader?" he exclaimed as he approached her and forced her to face him. "Who am I going to bone if you get killed out there, hmm?" he asked her teasingly. However, something about his playful words angered Tully and it took Negan by surprise when she brought her hand up and slapped him across the face with brutal force.

"You deserved that," she told him as she hurriedly put her panties back on. "The reason why I let you touch me or as you like to say, screw me is because a part of me wanted to be screwed by you and it's not just because you're good in bed but because I like you. I'm infatuated with you, Negan, so if you see me as just a vagina you could stick your prick in whenever you please, then I don't want to be your wife anymore," she confronted him. She was never usually this emotional or snappy. Perhaps her time of the month was coming but she was glad she blurted the words out to him while she was fuelled with adrenaline because she can never say it to him in any other situation. "In case you forgot too, that 30-day trial ended days ago and I can leave you whenever I want to now," she added.

Unlike Negan's other wives, Tully had never told him she 'loves him' to remind him of her loyalty to him. Telling him that she was infatuated with him was the closest thing to 'I love you' that he could get out of her right now. He approached her and snaked his arms around her waist from behind. She was certainly the most difficult woman he ever had to deal with in his life but that was one of the reasons why he liked her the most. She was a challenge and he always enjoyed challenges because he knew that he will always prevail in the end.

"I was only fucking kidding, of course you're more than just a pussy, you're my Candy," he told her as he held her firmly. He rested his chin on top of her head and felt her hands hold his'. "You can't fucking come along, Candy, it's not a fucking fieldtrip at school. I fucking care about you and I'm only thinking about your safety out there. Stay here with our girls."

She relaxed against him. "I know the risks Negan, I'm not an idiot. If you don't want me to come along then fine," her final response made him very pleased. He was pleased that he had put an end to her demand.

He pressed a kiss on top of her head. "Atta girl," he murmured against her hair. "Now are you still going to leave?" Tully knew he wasn't talking about leaving the room when he threw her that last question. "Are you willing to go back to earning points? Are you going to let the girls do chores that could injure them again? Or are you going to stay?" he asked her.

She turned around and faced him. Her deep brown eyes met his own warm brown eyes. "I'm staying," huskily, she replied. Negan smiled, he was very pleased but relieved at the same time. She wasn't like the other wives, she was more unpredictable. "I'm only staying for my girls," she clarified. "And I'm also staying because of you, Negan…because I want to be with you," she added, the words she had no intention of saying out loud had slipped out of her mouth. He smiled wider and brighter upon hearing her admission.

"I'm very glad to hear you say that, Candy," he told her, smiling. It was his smile that she found most captivating whenever she would look at him. It was carefree and genuine all the time. Was he glad that she was staying? Was he happy that she admitted her feelings for him? She reached forward and touched his left cheek. It was bright red from the slap she had given him.

"Please don't make me regret staying, Negan," she told him quietly as she looked hard into his warm brown eyes. He continued to smile as he lowered his face until she could feel his hot breath against her own face.

"You won't regret anything, Candy, as long as you stay the way that you are, a good wife," he assured her. He pressed his lips against hers and they kissed in the privacy of his room and Negan felt like a man who has conquered the world.


	15. Chapter 15

Patrick, the man from the infirmary who kept records of all the medical supplies at the Sanctuary watched Tully disappear out of the room. She carried an item she acquired from him secretly. She asked him repeatedly to keep the information he discovered about her to himself as he helped her search the medical supply room for one particular item. She left afterwards after making sure that Patrick would not tell anybody her current secret. She bribed him with a box of cigarettes she acquired using her privileges and that was enough payment to shut the older man.

Tully turned up to the kitchen late that morning. Not a single kitchen worker complained about their tardiness despite how much her tardiness affected the group. They were running late since she typically did the important jobs. However, they all knew better than complain about Negan's wife, especially when she was volunteering and dedicating her free time to help them. She had breakfast with the girls afterwards. She wasn't around when it was time to clean up the kitchen. The kitchen workers thought it was strange, she usually stuck around to help but they ignored it and said nothing about it.

Meanwhile, Negan left his bedroom, freshly showered and clean with Lucille in hand. He went to the girls' room, hoping to see Tully there. He had overslept and woke up late. He was a little irked that she didn't wake him up. He had a big day ahead. However, when he entered the room, he found the girls but there was no sign of Tully. "Where's your mother?" he asked them.

"She went to go to the toilet, she hasn't come back yet," Jamie replied. "She's sick, I think."

Negan nodded his head and said his goodbye to the girls, assuring them that he would be back by the end of the day with plenty of stories about his adventures outside. He trudged to the toilet closest to the girls' bedroom and discovered it locked.

"Candy, are you there?" he knocked. There was no response and Negan recalled Jamie mentioning that she was sick. Perhaps she was too sick to reply. "I'm running late because you didn't fucking wake me up so I can't wait until you finish taking a shit or whatever you're doing in there to say goodbye. I'll see you and the girls tonight." Again, there was no response and Negan concluded that she was too busy being sick to reply.

Negan met with the rest of his crew outside the building afterwards. None of them complained about the fact that he had kept them waiting for over an hour. Time revolved around Negan and time had to make the adjustment and not Negan. He was taking a number of his men out for the day, not for to pick up supplies but for something much more important.

* * *

Two men riding their motorcycles lead the rest of the group. Just behind the motorcycles was a truck that was large and designed for cargo. One of its passengers was none other than the leader of the group, Negan, who sat in the front seat of the vehicle with his precious baseball bat with its end wrapped in barbed wire resting on his lap. Behind this truck were three more motorcycles. Everyone was heavily armed as if ready for the worse to come. Trailing behind the group was a dirty old pickup truck that rumbled noisily as it encountered a few bumps on the road. Two armed men were sitting on the tailgate of the truck. They were engaged in a deep conversation. A man named Mark drove the truck. He was once the boyfriend of Amber who was now a part of Negan's harem. Next to him was Dwight, the very same man who had shot Tully with an arrow from his crossbow during her very first encounter with the Saviors. Both men were heavily armed as well.

At the back of the truck driven by Mark was a dirty old tarp that had been dumped there weeks ago. It had been forgotten by the men who were meant to discard it weeks ago. Tully peered through the smelly old tarp that covered her body completely from being noticed. She saw the two men sitting on the tailgate of the truck. They were not far away from her and if she ever caused any noise, she was certain that it can be easily heard and detected despite the truck's noisy engine. She had snuck into the back of the truck when Negan and his men were still inside the building. She hastily ate breakfast with her girls and lied to them that she was going to the toilet before she left. She knew Negan looked for her before he left and she hoped he believed the lie she fed the girls. Conveniently, she found a large tarp at the back of the truck and chose to hide under it. Now, all she had to do was make sure she doesn't get caught because she knew for sure that she would face terrible consequences.

Negan might be convinced that she will never see what he gets up to outside the Sanctuary but if he thought he was cunning, she was too. She knew he'd be very angry once he finds out what she had done but Tully was itching to know the truth. She was done relying on her imagination. The fact that Negan seemed determined not to let her find out what went on outside the Sanctuary was a motivation for her. She had to find out what he would get up to outside the Sanctuary with his men. She had to know why people owed him supplies. She had to find out the answer to the mystery. She had to know absolutely everything about Negan, including his activities, if she and the girls were going to stay in the Sanctuary forever. She had to make sure that her girls were safe and she also had to make sure that she knew exactly who Negan was.

Tully had no idea how long she had been hiding under the tarp. The truck kept moving and moving and Tulley could tell that they've been travelling on a straight road since they left the Sanctuary. She was getting antsy but she also knew that she had to keep still or someone might notice her. Long, incredibly boring minutes passed and soon turned into an hour or maybe two. Tully had no idea how long she had been lying still and she just waited and waited while she fingered an object she kept inside the back pocket of her jeans.

Some time later, the truck suddenly stopped. Tully eventually realised that it was parked. She felt the men sitting on the tailgate leave their seat. She heard several doors open and close and footsteps soon followed. She knew that they must've arrived at their destination. She heard a voice coming out of the radio, informing the men with her that 'they're coming towards them' and Tully wondered who was 'they'.

"Those motherfucking shitheads actually thought that they can fucking escape me," she heard a very familiar voice say cockily. Tully's heart raced. She felt a thrill that she last felt when she was running away from Negan and his men during their very first confrontation. With curiosity eating her up, she moved the tarp off her face a little bit to see what was going on. Much to her irritation, she realised that the two men had put the tailgate up which meant that she had to get up to see something.

Meanwhile, a van covered in dust slowed down as a group of heavily men blocked the road. "Get out shithead, you're surrounded," someone amongst the Saviors spoke. Behind the van were the group of vehicles driven by more Saviors that has been tailing them. On the side of the road were armed men with their guns pointed at the passengers of the van.

A minute later and the hesitant passengers of the van stepped out. They were forced to get on their knees and line up before the smug looking group of Saviors. One of them stepped forward, a man holding a mean-looking baseball bat meticulously covered in barbed wire. "Come on, I thought you pricks were fucking smarter than that!" Negan exclaimed, he shook his head as he if he disappointed by the effort of the small group before him. "How fucking hard is it to understand the new fucking world order? The rules are fucking simple. I'll fucking repeat it if you dickheads need to be reminded again," he started. His voice was dangerously cold as the group of people kneeling before him looked at him in horror. "You give me your shit or I will kill you. I'm not even asking for all your shit, just fucking half of it. Why is that too fucking hard to follow? Do you think you can make it all go away if you fucking run away from me?"

"N-Ne-Negan, please," one of the kneeling people before him pleaded for mercy.

Negan grinned. He grabbed the man by the collar and dragged him in the center. "Now you shitheads have to face the fucking consequence," he announced. "Since this prick like to talk when he's not spoken to, I'm going to fucking kill him using Lucille."

The last noise that came out of the man's mouth was a whimper as Negan proceeded to bash his head using Lucille with brutal force. In a matter of minutes, Lucille was covered in blood and bits and pieces of flesh. Her latest victim lay on a pool of his own blood, his face was maimed and unrecognisable. Negan turned his attention to the rest of the terrified group before him. However, before he can continue, one of his own men called his name. Irritated to be interrupted, Negan turned to look over his shoulder with a scowl. Instantly, his scowl vanished at the sight of the person that Dwight and Mark were holding.

She looked at him wide-eyed with a horrified expression on her face. He had seen her look at him with a fear in her eyes before but it was never this severe. She was looking at him as if he was a monster. She broke their eye contact and her eyes landed on the maimed corpse that lay on the ground. A split second later, she was on the ground, throwing up. Dwight and Mark dragged her away from the scene as Negan continued to handle the situation at hand. She was a mess. Another wave of nausea took over her and she found herself vomiting once more. They simply assumed that the scene was too much for her to stomach. A few minutes later, when she thought she recovered, Tully realised that it was no longer Dwight and Mark accompanying her but Negan himself with a bloody Lucille in his hand.

"What did you fucking see?" he demanded.

Tully ignored his question. "You're a sick person, Negan."

"What did you fucking see!?" he raised his voice and demanded.

"What are you going to do? Are you going to kill me too? Are you going to bash my head in with that thing?" she continued to ignore his question and mocked him instead.

"I'm fucking considering it-…"

"Oh go on then Negan, I dare you. I dare you to kill a pregnant woman, go ahead and kill the woman carrying your baby, you sicko-…" she cut him off but the rest of her words trailed off when she blacked out before him and Negan caught her before she could land face first on the concrete ground covered in her own vomit.


	16. Chapter 16

**hey everyone! i just wanna say a big thank you for the overwhelming amount of reviews after last chapter. lol, i'm glad that the story has gotten exciting again for most of you :)**

 **however, my bad news is that my updates might be a little delayed for the next few weeks because i have a mountain of uni work waiting to be done. i'm sorry in advance and i hope you guys will understand**

 **anyways, i hope you guys will enjoy this chapter!**

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Tully opened her eyes tiredly and stared at the white ceiling with yellow ageing spots. Instead of feeling refreshed after her sleep, she jumped out of the bed and rushed to the door. She recognised the room as Negan's room instantly. She had been to Negan's room more times than she could count with her fingers and toes that she knew every little detail of the room. As she reached forward and held the doorknob, Tully was horrified to discover that the door had been locked from the outside. He had locked her in his room, she realised and the very thought of it horrified her.

"Get me out of here!" she shouted as she began to bang her fists on the door. "Get me out of here or I'll break this goddamn door!" she threatened loudly, hoping that someone would hear. She yelled for several times and banged on the door until her fists were red and sore.

She only stopped when she heard a quiet click and instantly knew that someone had unlocked the door. Someone pushed the door open and Tully had to move away as the person let himself inside. She scowled at the sight of Negan, clad in his leather jacket with his dark hair slicked back. "Where are my girls!" she demanded as she tried to get to the door but he simply kicked it shut and picked her up and carried her over his shoulder like a sack of potato before dropping her on the bed.

"I hate to be the bearer of bad news but you can't see the girls," he told her simply. Tully looked at him like he was crazy. "They're fine, if that's going to fucking comfort you."

"I want to be with my girls now!" she demanded. If looks could kill, she would've killed him several times in several different ways.

"Fuck fuckity fuck!" Negan, growing impatient, shouted out as he ran his fingers through his hair, clearly frustrated. "You're being punished, therefore, you can't fucking see them."

"Who are you to tell me that? They're my girls, I have every right to see them," angrily, she pointed out. Negan pinched the bridge of his nose. He was trying to hold onto his patience in hopes it wouldn't snap.

"Do I need to fucking repeat myself? I said you can't see the girls because you're being punished for being a stubborn little shit," he told her. "Do I need to fucking remind you why you're being punished?" he asked her. Tully ignored him and crawled towards the side of the bed furthest away from him. "You should've been fucking dead, Candy. That shit you did was not cool and I should've killed you for it."

"Why didn't you?" she asked him irritably. He was silent all of the sudden. It was as if he can't bring himself to tell her why. "I'm going to die soon anyway," she muttered as she pulled something out from the back pocket of her jeans. She threw it at him, hitting Negan's chest before it fell on the floor. Negan picked the object up from the floor and looked at it. It was the pregnancy test containing the two lines that informed him she was pregnant. "This baby inside me is going to kill me. Pregnancy killed my sister and it'll probably do the same to me. My girls will have nobody and it's all my fault," she began to cry quietly, hiding her face by burying it in her hands.

Negan could hear her quiet sniffs and sobs as he approached her quietly. He occupied the spot next to her before he wrapped his arms around her and held her tight for a very long time until she stopped crying because there were no more tears left in her eyes. "I've always wanted to have kids of my own," he told her quietly, "and I know you do too. The girls are a fucking blessing but I know you want your own kids too." She wrapped her arms around him as he felt her body begin to relax in his arms. "You won't die, I won't allow that to fucking happen," he assured her. "You came into my life really fast and I fucking like it, Candy. You're my heaven, Candy."

He kissed the top of her head and slowly released her from his grasp. "I have to punish you because all actions have consequences. You can't see the girls until I say so and until then, you'll be staying here."

Her heart sank. She knew that it was the perfect way to torture her and Negan knew that. She wouldn't learn if he pressed a scalding hot iron on her face or if he beat her up which he will never do. So he had to use her greatest weakness to his advantage. She pushed him away, causing him to stumble back. Irritably, Tully hid herself under the covers and made it clear to Negan that she was done talking to him.

* * *

A few days later, a frowning Negan watched Tully place her bowl of soup down on the bedside table. She had been uncooperative and difficult for the past couple of days since he implemented her punishment. In fact, he can't even sleep in his own room because she wouldn't let him sleep in his own bed. She was clearly pissed at him and she had no issue letting him know about it loud and clear. Negan had no idea where he found the strength to tolerate her and it was very surprising, even for him, how patient he was with her.

"I know it taste shitty because those shitheads don't know how to fucking cook but you have to fucking eat, Candy," Negan told her as he picked up the bowl of soup and spoon she'd put aside. If he had to force feed her then so be it.

"I don't want to eat, I want to see my girls," stubbornly, she told him. Negan had lost count how many times she brought up the girls.

"The girls are fine, Candy. You fucking act like I fucking butchered them."

"I won't be surprised if you did," she told him sharply. Scowling, Negan shoved a spoonful of soup in her mouth, silencing her.

"You have to fucking eat or the baby will die of fucking starvation inside you," he reminded her. "Do you want to kill your own baby, Candy? Is that what you want to fucking do?" he taunted her. She snatched the bowl off his hands and finished its content in a span of two minutes. She hated that he was able to easily manipulate her to finish her food with just his words. She also hated that he had a point.

"What did you tell them? I know they're looking for me," she continued to interrogate him about the girls as she handed him the empty bowl back.

"The fucking truth," Negan replied simply. "I fucking told them you left the Sanctuary without permission and you have to be punished for it."

She frowned at him. "Did you also told them that you're a sick murderer?" she asked him. "You should have since you like telling the truth now. I don't remember you ever being truthful to me and telling me what the Saviors really do outside the Sanctuary before."

"It's not your fucking business!" irritated, Negan exclaimed. "You're just my fucking wife, you're just some woman who works in the kitchen. Who the fuck do you think you are?" he shot back. His words stung. Just a couple of days ago, he told her that she was his heaven and a part of her truly believed that she was special to him. Now, she was beginning to question if he had been truthful. He talked about her now like she was some insignificant member of the group, like he did not care about her. It crushed her a little to hear him talk about her the way he just did. She hated what he was. She hated that she discovered the real Negan, the man who murdered people with his baseball bat to assert his dominance. However, despite learning how much of a vile creature he was, she knew that a part of him was still the Negan she got to know…and she like that Negan. It was almost offensive to hear him talk about her as if he didn't value her.

"I'm trying to restore the fucking order around here, Candy. My goal is to fucking rebuild civilisation," he explained to her. "I put rules for people to fucking follow and the only way we're going to restore order here is if people follow the rules. The groups who owe me half their shit, that's their fee in exchange for the protection I provide them. Therefore, they're able to rebuild their miserable fucking lives because of the protection I offer them. That's how fucking simple the cycle is and if they fail to follow it, then they face the consequences like what you witnessed." He watched her as she pulled the covers and buried her entire body under it. She may appear as if she was done listening but Negan knew she wasn't. "I kill people, that's fucking true and I know you too have killed people so if I'm a murderer, so are you. I'm no fucking saint but don't act like you are because you're not one either." His statement made her turn around and face him with a scowl.

She wanted to correct him but he was right. As soon as she killed Ryan and the dangerous people she had come across in the past with the intention of protecting her loved ones, she was automatically classified as a murderer. His words made her feel horrible and guilty. She killed people. What kind of a role model was she for the girls? For her baby?

Negan watched as Tully pulled the blanket over her head, hiding herself completely from him. The cause of her emotional state could be several different things. She could be crying because she wanted to see her girls. She could be crying because of her pregnancy hormones. Or she could be crying because of Negan's wisely chosen words that attacked her.

She felt the bed shift from Negan's weight and his embrace immediately comforted her. It was not the sick murderer Negan she was with in that very moment but the Negan she had gotten to know and liked. He told her that she should stop crying and that he was sorry if he made her cry.

"I'm sorry, I was probably too harsh on you, baby," Negan murmured. He snuck his hand inside the blanket and touched her belly. "I heard before that pregnant women turn into cry babies because of their hormones. That's probably you right now, huh?" jokingly, he told her.

She didn't laugh at his little joke. "You should go, I don't want you near me right now," she murmured under the covers. She sniffed as she removed his hand from her belly. "Please."

"You're my fucking wife, Candy, you can't push me away forever," Negan told her as he followed her request.


	17. Chapter 17

Tully hated being alone. The loneliness that came with being alone was almost suffocating. It was as if loneliness had its invisible fingers wrapped around her neck. It was choking the life out of her, slowly yet painfully. Negan hasn't returned for days now. His thugs would occasionally come to bring her food but that was all they did. No one talked to her and she didn't talked to them. She was completely alone, removed from the rest of the community in Negan's isolated room.

She felt like she was going crazy. One thing Tully was never good at was keeping still. That was why before her punishment, Tully liked to do chores despite her privileged status as Negan's wife. The chores kept her busy and it kept her mind occupied. It made her forget that the world actually ended and the dead were very much alive. The chores distracted her and it kept her from thinking about how terrible the world has become. Then, of course, her girls made everything extra better. They were her world. They gave her a purpose. Their love and innocence made the new world more tolerable for her. Then there was Negan. His simple presence made her feel alive. His charismatic personality and his jokes made the world brighter. Although she hated him for locking her up, she missed him badly. She needed someone to share the gloomy room with her. Anybody will do…she just hated being alone.

Tully lost count of the days she'd been locked up in Negan's room as punishment. She decided to stop counting simply because she felt lonelier knowing how many days have passed since she was isolated from everybody else. Now she sat in front of the window, lonely and alone. Negan's room was located at the back of the building and there was nothing to see in the window but trees. Tully watched the trees sway as a strong gust of wind blew. She heard and felt the window in front of her rattle. She was bored but above all, lonely.

Her gaze landed on a small trail of ants on the windowsill, they scurried towards a crack in the wall. She guessed that between the crack was their home. She wished she was busy doing something like the ants. Tully's gaze landed on one particular ant trailing after the rest. Unlike the others, this particular ant wasn't carrying anything. Tully left her seat and she approached her empty plate that she left behind near the door where it was usually collected by one of Negan's thugs. She picked up a little crumb and went back to her seat by the window. She placed the little crumb near the ant and Tully watched as it picked it up a moment later. She smiled. It was the highlight of her day.

Her days had become so terribly boring and gloomy that helping out an ant actually made her happy. If Negan had accomplished something by locking her in his room, it was that he had taken her happiness and freedom away and as a result, it was slowly breaking her spirit.

* * *

Tully walked out of the toilet one morning with her hand resting on her belly. Her throat was dry and her head had been pounding since the early hours of the morning. She was stunned to see a familiar intimidatingly tall person who had been waiting for her to come out of the toilet, standing before her.

"Shit, Candy, you look like you're fucking dying," he commented as he removed the leather glove he wore and touched her forehead to feel her temperature. "Are you okay?" he asked when he felt that her temperature was fairly normal.

"It's just the morning sickness, I'm fine," she murmured tiredly, assuring him. Negan pressed a kiss on her lips, surprising her and immediately, Tully pushed him away. "I was just vomiting two minutes ago, I'm kinda gross right now," she told him tiredly. She was blushing, embarrassed with herself and Negan merely chuckled as he looked down at her.

"I'll fucking kiss you even if you have shit all over your face, Candy," he informed her before he kissed her again and this time, she didn't stop him. The kiss they shared only lasted for several seconds. Tully wondered whether she was still the only woman he kisses. She hasn't seen him for days...or has it been a week? Has he slept with his other wives while she was locked away, she wondered to herself almost bitterly. "Is my punishment over?" she asked him, feeling a little hopeful. Why else would he visit her?

Negan patted the top of her head. "No," he replied, breaking her heart. Irritated at him, she pushed him out of her way as she made her way back to bed. "What's the problem?" he asked rather innocently.

"You're my problem," irritably, she replied. He chuckled at the sharpness of her voice.

"Well, if you're going to fucking treat me with that attitude, I won't give you your fucking present," Negan announced. Although she was intrigued to know what it could possibly be, she ignored him.

"I made up my mind, I'm leaving you when this punishment is over," she announced, much to Negan's surprise. He certainly did not see that coming.

"Really?" although he was shocked, he managed to maintain the tone of his voice. "Are you really going to do that when you're fucking knocked up with my fucking kid inside you?" he challenged her. "That child inside you is fucking mine and you can't fucking take it away from me. You best pray I'm fucking dead if you do."

"Jerk," she muttered under her breath. She was too exhausted to further argue. She hasn't done anything productive for days and yet she felt very tired. She was no longer sure if it was the pregnancy or the depression.

Negan approached her quietly and handed her something. It was a piece of paper adorned with drawings. "The girls made that for you," he informed her, softening up again. His earlier angry demeanour suddenly diminished as he looked down at the miserable looking woman sitting on the bed.

She took the paper from him eagerly and looked at the drawings on the page. There were five people drawn on the page, three girls, one woman with a round belly and a man holding a baseball bat. At the top of the page the words 'our family' was written messily in what looked like Molly's writing. Tully wiped the tears off her eyes as she looked up at Negan.

"When will you let me out of this room?" she asked him. Negan's gaze found hers.

"When you learn your damn lesson," he replied simply, his voice was monotonous and there was not a single sign of emotion on his face.

"What lesson?" hopelessly, she asked him.

"Tell me what you fucking saw out there on the road?" he asked her with an expectant look on his face. Tully was reminded of the events that day and the reason why she was being punished.

"T-The maimed-…" shakily, she replied only to be cut off.

"Wrong fucking answer," Negan interrupted her. "You can't fucking leave this room until you give me the right fucking answer, Candy," he informed her, "and until you take back what you said about leaving me."

She sighed to herself as he left the room and slammed the door shut behind him. A couple of seconds later and Tully heard him lock the door from outside, trapping her in the room that has become her prison.


	18. Chapter 18

Tully turned her gaze away from the window and towards the door after hearing it creak open. She caught sight of Negan who held Lucille in one hand and a book in the other hand. He smiled at her as he kicked the door behind him. Weakly, Tully smiled back at him, unsure why he had paid her another visit. He was with her just a couple of hours ago when he brought her food for dinner and kept her company as she ate.

"I brought you a book, Jamie said you might enjoy it," he said as he left Lucille near the door and approached her with the said book in hand. He handed it to her and awkwardly, Tully took the object from his hand. It was a book containing numerous fairy tales.

"Thanks," she said and Negan watched as she trudged towards the bed with the book he had given her. He hasn't left the room or moved like she was expecting when she began to occupy herself by reading the first page of the book he had given her. She wondered whether he was watching her and when she looked up from her book, she caught his gaze. "I-Is there a problem?" she wondered out loud.

Negan approached her quietly, he looked troubled although one would not notice it if they don't look hard enough. He sat down at the end of the bed and kept his gaze on Tully. "I missed you, Candy. I just want you to know that," he claimed.

She didn't know what to say in response to his statement. She closed her book and placed it on the bedside table. "Do you want to feel the baby?" she found herself asking him instead. He was stunned by her offer but quickly agreed. He inched closer towards her when she motioned for him to occupy the empty spot next to her on the bed. Without a word spoken to one another, Tully took his hand and placed it on her swollen belly. There was no movement from the baby simply because it was still too small for its movement to be felt but as Negan rested his hand on her belly, he realized that it was the most intimate moment he and Tully had shared since she had been locked in his room. He had kissed her a week ago but this moment they current share was different, he felt like he was much more closer to her than he was a week ago. He pressed his ear against her belly in an attempt to hear the baby's movement and while he did so, he felt Tully's fingers comb his hair.

"I think the baby's asleep," he declared a few minutes later. He sat up and looked at her. She looked tired and her brown eyes looked dull as if there was less life in it. "You should sleep, Candy. It's late," he suggested.

Tully allowed him to pull her into his arms. She didn't protest when he embraced her tightly and she was surrounded by his strong musky and leathery scent, instead, she relaxed in his arms and closed her eyes. "You can sleep here tonight," she told him quietly. "I hate sleeping alone, it scares me a little."

Negan's arms tightened around her and he pressed a kiss on top of her head. "You will never understand how much I fucking missed you, Candy," he chuckled, "I'm glad to be back on my own fucking bed with my woman."

As result of her punishment, Tully became very dependent on Negan. She relied heavily on him like never before. Lately, he would come and visit her daily with the excuse that she looked very shitty and he wanted to be around more often to make sure she was still alive and well. He brought her food. He brought her things that would entertain her such as books. He brought her news about how the girls were doing. He was her only company in the gloomy room. He was the only one she spoke to, the only one she socialised with and the only one who made her feel that she wasn't fully alone. She was completely isolated from everyone else and as a result, he was all she had. She was lonely when he's gone because she was alone. She hated being alone. Therefore, whenever he's around, she felt less lonely. He provided her the companionship she needed to keep her sanity in the gloomy room.

They would talk when he's around and she'd ask him plenty of questions about the girls and even about what was happening in the compound. When they were not talking, they would be on the bed, she would either be in arms or she would be having sex with him. He'd tell her she was his' during the climatic moments of their lovemaking and she'd agree, giving him the answer that left him feeling pleased and dominant over her.

Tully was quickly forgetting what freedom felt like. She could no longer recall how independent of a woman she was before as she relied heavily on Negan. As a result of her isolation, she started to lose confidence in herself. It was only when Negan would spend time with her that she felt loved and special because those moments made her feel less lonely and no longer alone. Sometimes, she wondered to herself whether Negan would sleep with his other wives while she was locked in his room. The thought scared her. She feared that he'd replace her because he lost interest in her. Who would come and make her feel loved if he loses his interest in her? Who would offer her companionship while she was locked away from the rest of the world?

As each long days passed, Tully began to realise more and more that she was truly powerless. She was in Negan's territory where everything had to go in Negan's way. Negan's sick and twisted 'it's my way or the highway' philosophy prevailed. If you don't follow his way, well, there will be consequences. She had to stop challenging him. She had to be the obedient, inferior 'wife' she was meant to be…for her sake, for her girls' sake.

* * *

Negan found Tully sitting quietly on the windowsill and staring out of the window some time later when he arrived with her breakfast. She was pasty, almost grey and her eyes were red and puffy. He was no longer sure whether it was because she had been crying or because she'd been throwing up. She took the tray of food that he handed to her with a silent thank you before she proceeded to eat quietly.

He could smell his soap on her and her short hair was damp. Negan sat next to her and watched her eat. "How are the girls?" she asked him. It would always be the first question she would ask him.

Negan reached for something inside his pocket and handed it over to her. It was a small folded piece of paper. Tully opened it shakily and saw 'get well soon' messages from the girls written in their familiar writing. "I told them the baby's giving you a rough time."

She stared at the card and watched as her teardrops dampen the piece of paper. She had been away from her girls for so long that she was beginning to forget what their voices sounded like. She was beginning to forget what her children's love felt like. She abandoned her seat as she made her way back to bed. Negan watched her as she opened the drawer of the bedside table. She took out several pieces of paper containing drawings and letters sent to her by the girls. She added her new letter to her collection. She was a woman with a broken spirit. Being isolated made way for the loneliness to creep in and it was eating her up. Soon, it will damage her badly enough that she would be beyond repair. Therefore, she has to take some action.

"When will I see my daughters?" she finally asked him. Tully looked at Negan as he stood calmly in front of the window, his broad back clad in leather was facing her.

"Have you learned your lesson?"

"Y-Yes, yes I have," hopelessly, she told him.

"Tell me what the fuck you saw out there on the road?" he asked her. He turned around and faced her with an expectant look on his face as memories from that faithful day flashed through her mind

He was punishing her for seeing what she shouldn't have seen. He was isolating her, not because he was afraid that she'd tell everybody what she saw since everybody but her and the girls already know about the Savior's activities, he had been isolating her to teach her a lesson…a lesson about loyalty. He knew that what she witnessed that day made her doubt him and the safety he can offer her, the girls and the baby inside her. Before she was locked in his room and before her imprisonment made her very dependent on him, she was an unpredictable and dangerous woman. She would've left with the girls and his baby right away if he didn't locked her away and called it a punishment. So, he had to break her and he did that each day she stayed in her prison alone and isolated while depending solely on him for food and companionship.

She looked up at him fearfully. "No-Nothing, Negan, I saw nothing." Her final response made him smile. She had no choice, she had to give him what he wanted even if it meant lying to herself. If the only way to get out of the prison she's trapped in was to lie to herself, Tully was now willing to do it. Negan will never let her win if she continued to believe in the truth she had witnessed…losing to Negan meant not seeing the girls and potentially, having her baby taken by Negan too.

"Good," he nodded his head. She sighed in relief.

"When will I see my girls?" now hopeful, she asked again.

Negan looked at her smugly. "You'll see them when you fucking believe what you just told me, Candy," he replied. He wanted her to believe that lie for a simple reason…loyalty. She cannot leave him and she won't be leaving him if she was loyal to him. If she was loyal to him, she would turn a blind eye on what she witnessed and accept the fact that she and the girls belonged in the Sanctuary with him.

"I saw nothing," she told him, more confidently now. "Please Negan, I swear I'll keep everything to myself just let me see my girls. I can't do this anymore, I can't stay in this room for another day," she informed him. "I'll do anything, Negan, anything you ask for, just let me see my girls."

Negan smirked as he approached her slowly. She had cracked. Her desperation had gotten the best of her. "Any fucking thing?" he asked. "Well, fuck me, I'll let you out of this room if you promise that you and the kids will stay with me forever."

She nodded her head quickly. "Yes, yes I promise. I'll never leave, we'll never leave," the broken woman assured him. Blinded by her desperation, she was committing herself to him forever. She knew that nothing good will ever come her way if she defied him so she was better off surrendering and telling him what he wanted to hear.

"Good," grinned Negan. "You, the girls and my baby inside you are all fucking mine. I own all of you but I have to remind you Candy that if you break your promise and you leave with my children, I will fucking hunt you down," he informed her. "Believe me, I will fucking find you and I will personally kill you myself because that's the ultimate fucking punishment you'll get from me if you dare to fucking betray me and I'll make sure all our children will be watching to see what happens when someone breaks their motherfucking promise to me," he continued. "It'll be a fucking shame for the children to grow up without a mother so don't fucking do it."

Anyone would be stupid to assume that Negan's threats were just empty words. In that very moment, Tully finally came to realise that she was far to deeply involved with Negan to just walk away from him. In that very moment, Tully truly believed that she was helpless and too hopeless to escape and she just had to accept the fact that she had been burnt from playing with fire.


	19. Chapter 19

**hello everyone! just writing this note to say a MASSIVE thank you for the overwhelming amount of reviews last week and almost 20, 000 views**

 **you guys rock :)**

 **i hope you'll all enjoy this chapter and just a heads up, things are about to go crazy soon hehe...**

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One of the things that Tully instantly noticed after she was granted her freedom back was that most of the Sanctuary's residents seemed very cautious of her. She was beginning to hate walking around the Sanctuary with her growing belly especially when she could feel several pairs of eyes on her wherever she goes. Although it was never announced, anyone in the Sanctuary would know after just one glance her way that she was pregnant with Negan's baby. That simple reason made her an outcast. They treated her as if she was made of glass, therefore, they avoided her at all cost in hopes that by avoiding her, the glass won't break.

The day Negan allowed her to walk out of his room after she promised her forever commitment to him, Tully submitted herself to him, mind, body and soul. She was his Candy and Candy was the inferior, powerless woman who was very dependent on Negan. She had become what she never wanted to become…a woman like the rest of Negan's wives. He owned her and controlled her like a puppet. It was as if she was married to a mob boss, she was not supposed to ask questions or poke her nose to his activities outside the Sanctuary. Being his wife gave her privileges and in return, she was expected to be loyal to him and she was to be obedient.

The only thing that made her different from the other wives was that he would treat her a little more special than the rest. Some of those who observed his treatment to her assumed that she was his favourite simply because she was carrying his child, no one would ever consider the idea that maybe he treated her a little more differently from the rest because he felt something more than lust towards her.

Tully slaved away in the kitchen that morning. Cooking and preparing meals was Tully's favourite chore. She found it therapeutic and refreshing. It certainly kept her busy and distracted. However, since people found out about her pregnancy, Tully noticed that the amount of work that was expected from her in the kitchen had been significantly reduced. The people she had been working with in the kitchen since her early days in the Sanctuary treated her as if she was incapable of doing the heavy and excessive tasks that they would assign her to do before the pregnancy. It annoyed Tully because she felt like she was treated like an over-privileged spoiled brat but at the same time, she knew that Negan wouldn't be too happy if he finds out that the woman carrying his baby was being overworked.

"Jenny, will you smoke that damn thing outside," coughing, Sarah complained some time later during the morning while Jenny was busy indulging herself by smoking her third cigarette.

"Oh stop whining, let an old woman live her life," grumbled Jenny. In response, Sarah nudged Jenny and pointed at Tully.

"It's bad for Tully and the baby, do you know how unhealthy second hand smoking is for them," Sarah responded back. Without anymore complaints, Jenny started making her way out of the kitchen.

"Jenny," Tully called the older woman, "it's okay, you can smoke here, I don't mind," she assured the elder woman. She hated that she was the reason why people had to make changes to their lifestyle. They treated her like a precious baby. Jenny had been smoking inside the kitchen since the day Tully had met the older woman and Jenny wouldn't even leave when the girls were in the kitchen so why would she now.

"It's okay sweetheart, Sarah's right," Jenny assured her as she disappeared out of the room, Tully could only sigh to herself, feeling defeated.

After breakfast, Tully left the dining area with the girls. Since Negan released her, Tully and the girls would spend hours together. Often, the girls would tell her stories about things she had missed while she was gone or as Tully liked to think, locked away. They were headed to the girls' room when Tully and the girls stopped in their tracks after a Savior announced that everyone were expected at a gathering. Intrigued, Tully gathered her girls and followed the group of people from the dining area that were headed to the gathering. The last time Tully and the girls were involved in such gathering was when Negan branded Oliver who was accused of stealing a first aid kit which as it turned out, Carly actually stole.

Negan was already there with Lucille in hand as the residents of the Sanctuary gathered before him in silence. There was an empty plastic chair next to him and Tully wondered to herself who it was for. "Bring him in!" shouted Negan and amongst the crowd, Tully caught sight of two of Negan's goons dragging none other than Dwight, Sherry's former husband. They forced him to sit on the empty chair next to Negan.

"What you are all about to witness is going to be unpleasant!" Negan announced as his eyes scanned the crowd before him. It took him a minute before his brown eyes found a familiar pair of eyes looking back at him. There was Tully, standing in the crowd with the girls, chewing her bottom lip nervously. "As you all know, the process is completely voluntary when I choose a new wife. I never forced any of my wives to be with me, they all made the decision for themselves," said Negan as the crowd before him listened in silence. "It is an honour to be my wife," he stated arrogantly, "because as a wife, you no longer have to earn points to trade for goods and services but of course, it comes with a price and that is total devotion." He looked around again and his gaze landed on Tully again. She found herself gulping as she looked back at him. "That can sometimes be a hard pill for others to swallow but swallow it they must," he claimed.

He turned his gaze back to Dwight, pointing Lucille at him. "Unfortunately, this little shit can't swallow the pill fast enough," Negan muttered. He handed Lucille over to one of his men in exchange for the hot iron, the same iron he used to burn half of the wrongly accused Oliver's face. "You know the rules, Dwight. I'd say I'm fucking sorry but I'm not," Negan said. Two Saviors held Dwight down in his seat to keep him from escaping or moving as Negan pressed the burning, hot iron against the left side of Dwight's face. Dwight yelled out in pain, the sound that came out of his mouth made the hairs at the back of Tully's neck rise. She hated Dwight for shooting her with an arrow before but in that very moment, she pitied him for the pain he was currently going through. She felt Molly turn to her, the little girl sobbed as she held onto Tully while Dwight continued to scream in agony.

As Tully held Molly comfortingly, her gaze scanned the area until she found Sherry, standing towards the front where she guessed Negan had ordered her to stand. She guessed Sherry was unable to contain her strong feelings for her former husband and one thing must've led to another behind Negan's back. Tully felt sorry for the woman who stood straight and kept her chin up, despite the tears that streamed down her face. The other wives surrounded her, comforting her. Tully turned her gaze away from her sister wives and towards Negan, their husband and the very same man who locked her away and kept her isolated from the world for several weeks. She no longer know what to feel. Was she meant to be afraid? To be angry? To be disappointed?

Negan believed strongly in his rules and leadership. He thinks it would help him rebuild civilisation. No one could change his rules and the vicious punishments that come with it because he was a leader who liked to assert his dominance over his people. As Tully looked at him, she knew that the Negan standing next to the injured Dwight and the Negan who had locked her away for witnessing his brutality was not the Negan she had developed some feelings for. She watched Negan order Patrick and a couple of Saviors to take Dwight away. Tully watched him speak to his wives as the crowd began to clear, she remained where she was with the girls, watching him. As she watched him speak to Sherry, she knew he was comforting her. It was the Negan she knew and had fallen for speaking to Sherry in that very moment. She could almost see the kindness in his brown eyes as she spoke to her softly. She was relieved to see the other side of him appear, the much more pleasant side.

"Candy," she heard his familiar voice call her using the nickname he had given her since the first day they met. "Sherry and the others will look after the girls, I need you to come with me," he said.

"Will you girls be alright if I leave you three for a little while?" Tully asked her girls. Molly released her from her tight grasp, allowing Tully to be able to wipe her runny nose clean. "I'll be back soon, okay?"

"But you promised to play Monopoly with us," Carly tried to protest. From the corner of her eyes, Tully could see a familiar tall figure approaching.

"We'll play later," she assured Carly, "now go on, Sherry and the others will take care of you girls." Tully watched the three girls approach the women waiting for them. "Do you have to make Sherry watch while you maim Dwight?" she asked him as they both watched the wives walk away with the three girls.

"That's how they'll both learn," simply, Negan replied. "Come on, I'm fucking desperate to have a shower," he grabbed her arm and dragged her to his room.

* * *

The water was running and under the shower stood two people. Tully wiped away the shampoo residue off her forehead and watched as Negan meticulously scrubbed her clean. His hands eventually stopped on her swollen belly. Gently, he ran his hands on her belly. She was over a couple of months pregnant and her belly was growing. "Negan Junior," he said as he looked up at Tully.

"What?" she asked as she ruffled his damp hair with her fingers.

"We're naming him Negan Junior," he retorted.

Tully looked down at him as he kneeled before her with his hands on her belly. "We don't even know if we're having a boy," she claimed.

"I know that we are," confidently, he informed her. Tully simply smiled as he pressed a kiss on her belly.

"Okay, if you say so," she murmured quietly with a small smile on her face.

Reality is, their so-called 'marriage' had deteriorated ever since Negan locked Tully up as punishment. Days after her punishment, she was able to see her girls and restore her life to the way if was before but things between them were never the same. She knew she had single-handedly entrapped herself in her current predicament. She always wondered what her life could've been if she never met Negan or agreed to join his group. A part of her wanted to leave, to take her children away from him and the more she witnessed the vicious and controlling side of Negan's leadership just like the event involving Dwight, the more she wanted to leave. However, there was another side, the side that was a little more dominant than the other. It was the side of her that kept telling her to give Negan a chance. It was the side of her that was still very much under the spell of the charismatic man. It was the side of her who had fallen for Negan's good side and was convinced that she could help change him to be a better person and a leader. Perhaps the reason why she hasn't attempted to flee yet was because of that side of her that was still very attached to Negan, despite all he'd done to her during her imprisonment. Although the incident with Dwight earlier was frightening for Tully to witness and it made her mad that Negan would do such as thing to another human being, she still believed in Negan's good side so much that she was willing to forget about the Dwight incident and her imprisonment to keep giving Negan a chance to be better.

Some time before the punishment occurred, they were close. She would openly tell him things about herself and her old life but after the punishment, they haven't been to the rooftop at all. The rooftop was the place where they would usually talk and get to know one another during the early stages of their so called marriage. It was where she had gotten to know him as more than just the leader of the Saviors and the man making sure everyone in the Sanctuary had food and a safe shelter but their rooftop sessions no longer exists. Although their so called 'marriage' revolved mainly around sex like how things were with his other wives, one thing that kept the little spark burning was their children. He assumed the role as her girls' father and just like his treatment of her, he treated the girls a little differently from the rest of the Sanctuary's residents. In return, the girls adored him greatly. They were unaware of the dark things he was capable of doing outside the Sanctuary and they saw him as not only a fatherly figure but as their hero. If there was something Tully and Negan could still bond over, it's the anticipation of the baby's arrival. She was still very far from her due date as it has only been three months since she discovered her pregnancy but like every parents who are expecting their firstborn, their excitement was mutual. He was clearly excited to be a father of his first biological child just as much as she was excited to be a mother of her firstborn and she always liked to see the fatherly side of Negan.

"Do you think he'll have dimples like you?" Tully found herself asking as she looked at his smiling face.

His smile grew wider, enhanced by the dimples on his cheeks. "Of course, he'll be one good looking little ass kicker like his father," he assured her cockily. Tully smiled as he continued to talk animatedly about the baby. There was a loving glint in his brown eyes as he talked. It made him appear more human and less of a monster.

"I can't wait to meet him," Tully murmured as she ran her hand on her growing belly with Negan watching her. She truly cannot wait. She hoped that Negan Junior will change everything. If she cannot change Negan, she hoped Negan Junior will. She hoped that after the birth of their baby, Negan would improve as a leader and an overall human being and he'll stop participating in the horrific activities he's a part of with his thugs and his baseball bat, Lucille.


	20. Chapter 20

Jamie looked at her adoptive mother worriedly as Tully held onto the sink with one hand while the other clutched her back. "Are you okay, Mom?" she asked, instantly taking note of the pained expression on Tully's face. It took a couple of minutes before the pain Tully felt subsided and she was able to assure the younger girl that she was okay.

"I'm fine Jamie, it's just a little stomach cramp." Tully turned her attention to the two younger girls in the shower. "Come on, it's time to come out now, water is precious."

They all left the bathroom together with Tully trailing after the girls. She walked slowly simply because she was cautious of the reoccurring stomach cramps she was feeling. She watched the girls disappear out of sight, leaving her with the task of catching up as she held onto the wall to help balance herself. The pain was normal, she assumed. It was nothing to be worried about.

Her slow, struggling form came across Dwight a minute later. He seemed to be on his way to his room when he came across her. A day after Negan burned the side of his face with a hot iron, his newly acquired injury was hidden behind a thick white bandage. Detecting that she was struggling, he stopped in front of her and extended one of his hands. "Do you need help?" he asked. Tully would never expect Dwight of all people to offer her some help. After all, this was the same man who had shot her with an arrow the first time they encountered each other and as a result of that, he was one of the people in the Sanctuary she avoided.

"I think I can manage," she assured him but he seemed unconvinced. He held her arm firmly and helped her walk like how young people would help the elderly. Gently and slowly, he guided her in every step. Tully felt embarrassed. "I just need to lie down, I think, my stomach cramps are a little painful," she reasoned out. Not wanting to appear weak and incapable, she decided to explain why she was so weak all of the sudden.

Dwight didn't say anything and Tully felt a little awkward. Ever since the event yesterday that left him badly injured, Dwight had been staying in his room, resting his injury. Somehow, she feared that she was wasting his time. He took her to the bedroom she shared with the girls and much to their surprise she discovered Negan inside the room with the girls. He was in the middle of telling the girls one of his graphic, horror stories when he caught sight of Tully with none other than Dwight. He got up from the makeshift bed where he was sitting with the girls, his dark gaze was fixed on Dwight.

"He was helping me," quickly, Tully explained. She didn't want to cause more injuries to Dwight. By the way Negan was glaring at Dwight, Tully felt like he was not convinced. "I was having trouble walking and he was nice enough to offer some help," she elaborated. She turned her attention to Dwight who had let go of her arm. "Thanks again."

"Yes, Dwight, thank you," Negan said. He was suspiciously calm despite the scowl on his face. He yanked Tully's arm and pulled her towards him, separating her from Dwight. "You can fuck off now, go on," he said, nodding towards the door.

Without a word, Dwight left the room, not once glancing back. Now left with Negan, Tully asked him to let go of her arm. "You're hurting me," she claimed, pointing at his tight grip on her wrist. He let go of her wrist quickly but his narrowed eyes remained focused on her. Tully ignored him and walked towards the girls where she proceeded to lie down on her usual spot.

"Why were you having trouble walking?" he questioned, clearly both concerned and curious at the same time. Tully closed her eyes, she was too tired to explain herself but she knew Negan wouldn't leave her unless she answered his interrogation.

"Just some stomach cramps," she explained. "Don't worry too much, it' nothing," she assured him. She turned her attention to her girls and gathered them close to her, letting Negan know with just her actions that she was not going to be sleeping with him in his bedroom for the evening. He said nothing, rather, he stayed with the girls until they had all fallen asleep, including Tully.

* * *

When Tully woke up, it was still late in the evening. Her urgency to pee forced her to get up and leave the room. Judging by the deserted hallway, Tully guessed that it was pretty late and most of the Sanctuary's residents have retired for the evening. She walked quietly to the toilet, still sleepy and eager to get back to bed. A few minutes later and a yawning, sleepy Tully stepped out of the toilet with the intention of walking back to the room she shared with the girls. However, rather than heading to the direction she had come from, a certain noise coming from the other side made Tully very curious. It was just a faint noise, the sound of someone's muffled cries. Intrigued, Tully walked towards the direction she heard it come from, her footsteps were quiet and careful against the floor.

Her footsteps came to a sudden halt when Tully stopped in front of the room where she suspected she heard the noise come from. The door was slightly parted open and the curious Tully took a peek inside. Almost quickly, she covered her mouth with her shaky hand as she looked at the scene unfold before her. There was Sherry, stark naked and on her knees while standing in front of her was none other than Negan, just clad in his white t-shirt, the rest of his clothes were discarded on the floor. She almost jumped when she heard the door next door open quietly and Tully, embarrassed to be caught snooping, turned to look at the person who walked out of the other room. She was even more stumped to discover it was none other Dwight who was glaring at her. He extended his hand at her, wordlessly offering to take her away. Shakily, Tully reached forward and held his hand before he guided her to the direction she had initially come from.

Tully didn't even know how she managed to move. She was in shock. Dwight has not spoken a single word at all as he walked with her to her room. Somehow, Tully was glad that he was quiet because she thought that her shock made it impossible for her to speak. She glanced at his direction, hoping to see an expression on his face but she found none, his face was completely stoic. However, his eyes told her a different story. She didn't have to ask him whether he knew who was in the room next door to his' because clearly, he already knew. A part of Tully wondered whether it was intentional. Was Negan screwing Sherry in the room next to Dwight's on purpose as a way of showing off the fact that he has Sherry and Dwight doesn't?

"Thank you," Tully found herself saying quietly as they stopped in front of the room she shared with the girls. Dwight didn't say anything, instead, he turned around and proceeded to leave. "I'm sorry that Negan's a dick, I really am," Tully told him sincerely.

Her words made him stop in his tracks. He looked over his shoulder and glanced her way. "Yeah, I'm sorry too," he said quietly before he disappeared out of her sight. As soon as Dwight was nowhere in Tully's line of sight, the tears started coming and the sobs began erupting out of her. She wasn't even sure why she was crying. Was she crying because of what she had witnessed? Was she crying all of the sudden because of jealousy? Betrayal? She shouldn't feel those things…she was just one of his many wives after all. She wiped away her tears and told herself to get over it. At the moment she got to the room she shared with the girls, Tully occupied her vacated spot on the makeshift bed and cuddled close to Jamie who was closest to her. She tried very hard to stop crying. She hated the fact that what she had witnessed was tearing her apart. It was hurting her. She had always known that she was not the only woman in Negan's life but to see it for herself was a whole different story. It hurts to see more than it hurts to know.

"Mom?" Jamie's sleepy voice prompted Tully to close her mouth and stop her sobbing. The girl rolled over to be able to face her and Jamie was instantly greeted with the sight of a teary-eyed Tully. "Why are you crying?" Jamie demanded.

Quickly, Tully wiped away her tears and forced a smile on her face. "I'm not," she chuckled as she wrapped her arms tighter around Jamie. "I just had something in my eye," she reasoned out but by the look on Jamie's face, she was unconvinced. "Go back to sleep," whispered Tully as she felt Jamie's return the embrace. Tully closed her eyes, comforted by the embrace she shared with the girl. As Tully lay with her girls, she reminded herself that she shouldn't be affected by Negan's actions. She had the girls and the baby and as long as she has them, she will never be alone. She may not be the only woman in Negan's life but at least, she's her children's only mother.


	21. Chapter 21

**hey guys, i'm sorry for the slow update, things have been hectic with work and uni lately but i'm back :)**

 **also, i wanna say a big, big, BIG, thank you to all my lovely readers, i'm glad you guys are enjoying this story and don't hesitate to let me know what you think by REVIEWING**

 **speaking of REVIEWS, thank you so so so so much for the lovely reviews guys! a reader suggested a song titled 'Million Reasons' by Lady GaGa which they thought fits this story and i actually liked that suggestion, i listened to some TWD songs when i wrote this story and i still do to get in the mood whenever i re-read this story and i found lots of TWD songs are really good. "Chapel" by Nicole Dollanganger is really good as well as "The Last Pale Light in the West" by Ben Nichols aka Governor's song. Tbh, although the story doesn't relate to it 100%, Paolo Nutini's "Candy" is what i have been listening to on repeat when i wrote the first two chapters (that's why she's called Candy) lol... anyways,** **i'd be happy to hear any song suggestions from you guys :)**

 **also, sorry for the short chapter but don't worry, something big is building up so prepare yourselves!**

 **p.s. if you haven't watch it yet, watch the new season's sneak peek!**

* * *

Tully was walking with the girls, carrying their freshly washed and cleaned laundry when she caught sight of a familiar tall man walking on the other side of the corridor. Quickly, she turned around and walked straight to the opposite direction, avoiding the figure that quickly jogged towards her. "Candy!" he called, waving Lucille around as he ran towards her. Rather than turning around to face him, Tully continued to walk away from him briskly. "Candy!" he yelled out again.

Finally, her brisk footsteps came to a complete halt and irritably, she turned around and faced him. "What?!" she demanded. She was clearly vexed. In fact, it wasn't the first time in over two weeks that she had been pissed off at him. Whenever Negan was around, she would always be angry and impatient with him. It all started that terrible evening when she caught him with Sherry and of course, Negan didn't know that. He assumed that her crabbiness was just the product of her pregnancy.

"I got you some popcorn," he mused, ignoring her grouchiness. He waved around a small packet of microwaveable popcorn at her. From where he found it or how he discovered that she'd been craving for some, Tully had no idea. What she did know was that she had been visiting the food inventory often in search for some popcorn and had been unsuccessful at finding any.

She snatched the packet of microwaveable popcorn off his hand and placed it on top of the pile of clothes she carried before turning around to leave without further acknowledging him. "Come on girls," she said over her shoulders and quickly, the girls followed her.

She took the girls to the kitchen after dropping off their clothes with the intention of cooking the popcorn that Negan had given her. Tully wasn't sure why she had been craving for popcorn. It could be just the beginning of her pregnancy cravings or it could be because she wanted to be reminded of her childhood, of the times she'd have a bowl of popcorn on her lap while she sat with her sister on the sofa, watching TV. She cooked the microwaveable popcorn using a tin pot and soon enough, the empty kitchen was filled with the strong scent of buttered popcorn.

Tully shared her popcorn with the girls. Although she had been wanting the popcorn for a while, Tully only took a handful before allowing the girls to have the rest. Sacrificing was one of the things she learned since taking the role as the girl's mother. She watched them eat with a smile on her face. "Have some more, Mommy, the baby might want more," Molly said, offering her some more of the popcorn but Tully declined, assuring them that the baby had more than enough.

Soon, the girls were interrupted when the very man who had provided them with the popcorn stepped inside and approached the girls. "Do you want some, Mr. Negan?" Carly asked, offering Negan some popcorn in her hand. The man simply chuckled and took one before plopping it inside his mouth. His gaze was fixed on Tully who avoided his eyes and busied herself picking on her jeans.

"I was wondering if we can talk," Negan said, addressing Tully. She didn't say anything, instead, Tully got up from her seat and left the room and Negan interpreted her answer based on her actions. He followed her out of the room, away from the children's earshot. "If you think I didn't noticed, I did. You've been avoiding me like the fucking plague lately." Tully looked back at him blankly. Whenever she looked at him, she remembered seeing him with Sherry and it hurts, although, she never understood why. "What did I do wrong? Talk to me, baby," he said, approaching her until he had her sandwiched between him and the wall.

"It's nothing," she shrugged, "just the pregnancy." She didn't want to tell him anything that would make her appear jealous or affected by his actions because what he does with other woman shouldn't impact her. When she signed up to be his wife, she was well aware that she wasn't the only woman in his life so she had no right to feel hurt or betrayed. She didn't understand why she felt the way she did and blamed it entirely on the pregnancy hormones

Negan's brown eyes softened as his arms found their way around her waist. He pulled her close to him and held her tightly, their first embrace in over two weeks. "I missed you," he said. "If I did something wrong and you're just not telling me, you know I'm fucking sorry." She said nothing more and just hugged him back. Negan wasn't the type of person to easily apologise and she appreciated that he did, even if he didn't know what he was apologising for. As she embraced him back, she realised that she too had missed him. She thought that she had a weak spot for him and Tully hated it…this man cannot be her weakness because her only weakness are the people she love and surely, she doesn't love Negan…right?

* * *

The very idea that she was in love with Negan frightened Tully. Sure, she knew she had feelings for him but that's different. Her feelings for him are not strong enough to turn into love…well, that's what Tully made herself believe as far as she was concerned. She admired the gentle side of Negan and the fatherly side of him towards her girls but she can't see herself wanting to spend the rest of her life with him. Sure, she promised him that she will stay with him with the kids but perhaps it's time for Tully to take actions and avoid that from turning into a reality. Would she really want her children to be stuck in the Sanctuary, to rely heavily on Negan and to dedicate themselves to him? Tully also reminded herself of the night she witnessed Negan with Sherry. Would she really dedicate herself to a man who had a bunch of other woman? A man who can't full commit to only her?

In denial of her genuine feelings for Negan, Tully found herself snooping around the Sanctuary later that day. She wasn't sure what she was doing exactly. Her mission to find some secret passage that would take her out of the Sanctuary seemed impossible. Unbeknownst to Tully, a pair of eyes had been watching her as she walked all over the Sanctuary for the next hour that followed. She searched empty rooms and investigated the building in hopes of finding a way she can leave with her girls without being detected.

"Hey!" called a voice as Tully was snooping around the armoury which she discovered locked. Frightened to be caught where she shouldn't be, Tully quickly turned around and discovered the person who called her out was Dwight. "Come with me," he said, grabbing her arm and dragging her away from the armoury.

Tully ended up being taken to the first empty room they came across. She was not sure what Dwight wanted from her or what his intentions were and it made her very nervous. "What do you want from me?" she found herself asking him.

"I've been watching you," stated Dwight, "I know what you're trying to do." She grew even more nervous in fear that he would tell Negan as a way of redeeming himself. What would Negan do to her?

Tully hid back her fear and let her sass take over. She folded her arms across her chest and glared at him. "And what was I trying to do?" she questioned him.

"You were trying to find a way to escape," said Dwight simply, "and minutes ago, you were trying to get in the armory to get some weapons for yourself. Negan's wives aren't allowed access to any weapons, in case you forgot." He seemed smug as he told her exactly what she was trying to do.

"No I wasn't," denied Tully although they both knew she was lying, no matter how sassily she responded back.

"I've done it before," continued Dwight, "I searched this entire place for a way I can escape without the guards knowing." This revelation stunned her. "Sherry and I managed to escape with her sister a few months before you came. After observing and snooping around for weeks before our escape, I learned that the guards would leave the Sanctuary unguarded for at least fifteen minutes whenever it was meal time, so one day, we took our chances and escaped while the Sanctuary was unguarded," Dwight explained. "He caught us just a few later though, that's how cunning he is."

"Why are you telling me this?" Tully wondered out loud, suspecting Dwight's motives.

"Because I want you to know that it's a terrible idea to plan and leave this place," said Dwight, "he's everywhere. Negan has eyes wherever you go and with you carrying his kid, he won't let you out of his sight. Don't underestimate him. It'll be a shame when your girls end up without a mother." The hairs at the back of Tully's neck rose as she listened to Dwight's warning. She remembered her promise to Negan and his warning to her if she ever attempts to break her promise to him. Somehow, Tully wanted to leave even more. What the hell has she gotten herself into?

"Here," Dwight handed her something, forcing her to take the object he was offering her. Tully realised it was a handgun and judging by its weight, Tully knew it was fully loaded. It was the first weapon she held after a very long time. Negan's wives aren't allowed access to the armory after all and they are restricted from having weapons which could potentially harm Negan. "It will come in handy one day. Use it wisely," said Dwight before he left Tully alone in the room, staring at the gun in her hand.


	22. Chapter 22

Tully continued to deny the idea that she was in love with Negan and the gun that Dwight had given her remained hidden in the room she shared with her girls for the next couple of weeks that followed after receiving it. She remained undecided whether to leave and escape from Negan's control because a little part of Tully remained a faithful wife…and that faithful wife was hoping that Negan Junior would change Negan and solve all her problems.

Negan had taken a number of his men out with him and they have been gone for a couple of days to 'gather some more supplies' for the Sanctuary. They just arrived after this two-day trip and Tully would be lying if she claimed that she didn't miss him. Although she was still avoiding him most of the time, there was a difference between having Negan around the Sanctuary and not having him around. When he's around, she was at ease because she knew his condition, she knew that he was safe in the Sanctuary and she also had the chance of catching a glimpse of him whenever she desired. When he's not, she's left in the dark, she had no idea what his condition was and she hated not seeing him, not even a glimpse. During the two days that he had been gone, she had been restlessly thinking about him, wondering whether he was okay and hoping that he would come home to her in one piece. She disliked the fact that she was so eager to have him back in the Sanctuary. It was her feelings for him that was making her feel that way...it was her _love_ for him but Tully refused to acknowledge it. She simply told herself that she only missed him because she missed avoiding him and she was eager for his return simply because she didn't want her children to be fatherless.

That afternoon after Negan and the Savior's return to the Sanctuary, Tully found herself entering Negan's room. She wanted to see him but the excuse she had for coming to see him was to pick up his laundry. As soon as she entered his bedroom, she didn't see him at all. She quickly realised that he was in the bathroom judging by the sound of the running water. Unconsciously, she smiled to herself before a sigh of relief escaped her lips, she was relieved to know that he was home safe.

She noticed his clothes discarded on the floor and Tully shook her head before she proceeded to pick them all up. As Tully gathered the clothes discarded on the floor, she noticed Lucille resting against the wall near the bathroom. Negan's precious bat, Lucille, named in homage to his deceased wife, was covered in red stains. Some of the red stains have dried out but some appeared fresh. Tully put Negan's clothes aside and found herself picking up Lucille to examine the stains all over the bat. As she meticulously looked closer at the bat she held, she noticed that numerous strands of dark hair were tangled all over the barbed wire that was wrapped around the bat. She looked closer at one spot upon spotting something oddly strange. Shakily, Tully reached for a small object stuck between the wires. The thing was moist, from the blood, and it was very soft. She narrowed her eyes as she looked at the object closely. It was pink with strands of short hair all over it. It felt like a gummy bear as she squished it between her fingers.

Somehow, a very clear memory of what transpired many weeks ago flashed through Tully's mind as she held the strange tiny object in one hand and Lucille with the other. She remembered everything like it was yesterday. She recalled how Negan mercilessly bashed a person's head with Lucille before maiming the person to death with his weapon of death. She cringed at the recollection of the memory that she tried very hard to erase. As Tully glanced down at the red stains all over Lucille, she knew that she was looking at blood stains all over Lucille and the hairs stuck all over the barbed wire was the hair that was once attached to Lucille's victim's head. She turned her gaze to the small, little squishy thing she held with her other hand. She held back a scream as she threw the thing across the room in horror at the realisation that it was a tiny portion of someone's brain she had been holding. In horror, she dropped Lucille. Actually, she had lost her grip due to the uncontrollable shaking of her hands.

Terrified, she abandoned her chore completely and found herself running out of Negan's room, teary-eyed with her heart throbbing so hard against her chest that it was suddenly so difficult for her to breath. Negan just killed another person, she thought in panic. She just held a piece of someone's brain, she recounted in horror. Then, she remembered her sister, Emily, and the promise she gave her sister during her dying moments. She swore that she would protect the girls, that she would find them a good home but what had she done so far? Instead of taking the girls to a safe haven, she had taken them to the devil's lair disguised as a sanctuary!

Tully found the girls in their room, getting themselves ready to play with Sherry and the other wives. However, as soon as Tully entered the room, she ordered them to pack their things. "We're leaving," announced Tully. The girls were stunned by Tully's command but judging by the hard expression on Tully's face that masked her horror, they knew that their adoptive mother was serious.

The very last time Tully felt an excessive amount of adrenaline pumping through her veins was when she was running away from Negan and his men after attempting to steal from them during their very first encounter. Now, she was going to run away from him again and this time it's for good. In a rush, Tully shove whatever item she found useful in their bags while the confused girls hesitantly helped Tully pack. The last thing Tully found was the gun that Dwight had given her two weeks ago and unlike the other items, Tully didn't shove it in the bag, instead, she held it firmly.

With the three confused girls in tow, Tully took them to the Sanctuary's front door where it was guarded by a Savior who seemed surprised to see Tully and the girls. "Let me out," demanded Tully feistily as she pointed her gun at the Savior.

"I'm afraid I'm not allowed to do that," replied the Savior.

"Of course you're not, why else would I be pointing a gun at you," muttered Tully irritably, "but if you want to live, you'll open that door and you'll let me and my girls out."

Threatened by Tully's words but also afraid that whatever action he undertakes would hurt the pregnant Tully, the Savior complied and opened the door like she asked. He was aware that the front door was only Tully's first obstacle. She had to go through the gate guards after all. So, as soon as Tully and the girls stepped out of the front door, the Savior rushed to Negan's room to report the situation to his leader.

* * *

The words 'Tully,' 'gun' and 'escape' in the same sentence only meant one thing and Negan knew exactly what it was. As soon as he heard those words, he rushed out of his room with merely a towel around the lower half of his body. As expected, they discovered that Tully was held back from escaping by the men guarding the gates who had bigger guns than her and who can eliminate her and her girls at the same time with their big guns.

"What the fuck are you fucking doing?!" irritated and angry, Negan questioned the woman who quickly turned her attention towards him. She held a gun and as soon as she caught sight of him, she pointed it at his direction.

"I'm leaving with my girls," stated Tully simply.

Negan laughed at her words. "You are?" he said mockingly. "Now if I remember correctly, I told you the consequences if you end up doing something as fucking stupid as this-…"

"Are you really going to kill me in front of these girls," just as cockily as him, Tully responded back. "Are you going to blow the brains of the woman carrying your baby?" she questioned. "Are you going to kill your own baby?" The smug smile on Negan's face diminished as she questioned him. "You have to understand, Negan, I care for these girls and my baby. Their needs comes first before mine and most especially before your needs. What my children need is a safe place where they can have a proper childhood and the Sanctuary is not the right place. In fact, the Sanctuary is nothing but an illusion, it's a false safe haven and you'll never rebuild civilization with your beliefs and morals," she told him, explaining the reason behind her actions. "I promised my sister that I will find a good home for these girls and I'll also do anything to give my baby a good life. I am going to fulfill that promise even if it means breaking my promise to you."

Without letting him respond, Tully pulled the trigger with the gun aimed at Negan's direction. Tully watched Negan stumbled back. He was yelling out at his men but she could not hear because of the ringing in her ears. What she did not realize was that he was yelling at his men, ordering them not to shoot her. She did not injure him severely and the bullet merely grazed his right shoulder. Knowing she had been unsuccessful, Tully continued to point her gun at Negan with her finger on the trigger.

"Let me and my girls go," she told him, "I'm not afraid to pull the trigger, Negan, and I have a clear shot of your head right now." She shot him once, she can do it again.

Negan cursed under his breath. "Fucking fine!" he responded back angrily. "Open the fucking gates and let the bitch go."

Tully had never been so relieved to see the large gates open. Without glancing at Negan's way, she gathered her girls and led the way out of the Sanctuary and towards their freedom. The chained and staked walkers that surrounded the exterior of the Sanctuary growled louder upon sensing Tully and her girls' presence as they step out of the gates.

Meanwhile, Negan watched scornfully as Tully trudged away with the girls. He turned to the Savior next to him, still feeling bitter that Tully would betray him the way she did. He couldn't even feel the pain that the bullet had caused. Instead, he was mad...very mad that she had manipulated the situation the way she did. "I'll get them all back when she least fucking expect it," he muttered under his breath.

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 **sorry for such a short chapter guys but don't worry,** **i'll update soon (most likely before the season 7 premier)**

 **so stay tuned :)**


	23. Chapter 23

**alright, guys, as promised, here's a chapter before the season premier.**

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"Why did we leave, Mommy?" Molly asked as the four gathered around a small fire that Tully had started. They had been walking for hours as far as Tully was concerned so she had called it a night and started a fire under a large tree on the side of the road.

"Because the Sanctuary is not a good place for you girls and the baby," replied Tully. "Look, I think Negan is a good Dad to all you girls but he can be a bad person sometimes and I can't allow you all to see that."

"But where will we go now?" Jamie asked.

"I don't know," admitted Tully. She was hopeless but she cannot show her girls that. "I promise you girls, we'll find a place, a better place." She smiled at her girls, hoping her words would comfort them even if it did very little to comfort her.

"I'm scared, Mom," announced Carly who embraced her adoptive mother tightly. The girls and Tully have not been out of the Sanctuary's safe walls for many months and as a result, they have all forgotten how frightening it was to be out in the open where they could be attacked by rogue humans or hungry walkers.

"Don't be, I'm here and I'll be looking after you and your sisters," assured Tully.

It was late in the evening and Tully watched over the girls as they tried to sleep. It was hard to do so, especially if you are aware that you're out in the open where you can be attacked and killed easily. Tully hummed lullabies and told the girls stories. Hours probably passed before they had finally fallen asleep, leaving Tully the only one awake. She cannot sleep. Like their old life before they joined Negan's group, she had to stay up at night to make sure her children are safe. Besides, there was a part of Tulley that was suspicious that somewhere in the woods, she was being watched by Negan's men and possibly Negan himself.

Tully stared at the gun on the ground next to her. She almost killed Negan. A part of her hated the very idea of hurting Negan while another part of her was grateful she had threatened him the way she did to let him know that he had no control over her anymore. She was not Candy, the woman who relied heavily on Negan and the woman who promised to be with him forever. She was Tully, the headstrong woman who would do anything for her children. However, what Tully wanted to know was whether Tully and Candy felt the same for Negan. Are Tully and Candy both in love with Negan?

Tully felt her belly and sighed to herself. If she was indeed in love with Negan, she can no longer do anything about it. Her children's needs comes first and her needs come second. Tully's train of thoughts were eventually interrupted by the sound of the leaves rustling. Automatically, she reached for her gun and looked around. She found nothing but she knew there was something lurking in the woods. Could it be Negan and his men who were about to forcefully take her and the girls back to the Sanctuary? A few minutes passed and the rustling continued and the more it continued, the louder it got. Soon, Tully heard a noise that made the hairs at the back of her neck rise, it also made her heart thud faster than ever before. It was the sound of a collective moaning coming from only one type of creature she could think of. From the sound of it, there were many of them.

Hastily, Tully woke up the girls as she put out the fire and gathered their belongings. Sleepily, they followed their mother's orders as she ordered them to get to the road where no trees would abstract them but as Tully quickly realized, it was her biggest were greeted with a large herd of walkers wandering aimlessly during the late hours of the evening. The sight of them terrified Tully who initially assumed that the walkers she heard were coming from the woods but as it turned out, the herd was so large that they were coming from both the woods and the road. "Not that way, girls! This way," shouted Tully as she picked up Molly, leading the way as they all fled from the approaching herd. It seemed like the herd had detected their presence, whether from the commotion they have caused trying to flee or from their scent but whatever it was, the herd had picked up its pace and was after Tully and her girls.

Tully had never run for months and the fact that she was pregnant wasn't helping her situation either. Within minutes, she was huffing and puffing and struggling to run faster as she carried Molly over her shoulder. "Mom, they're getting close!" shouted Jamie who sensed that Tully had slowed down. She stopped in her tracks and grabbed Tully's arm, pulling her and urging her to go on. Carly did the same as the girls urged Molly to help out too. Soon, all three of Tully's girls were helping her move forward.

"I'll be fine, you girls go ahead," knowing she was slowing them down, Tully informed her girls who hesitantly obeyed.

A couple of minutes haven't even passed when a loud, hair-raising scream suddenly alerted Tully. The scream came from Carly who was running ahead of everybody else. "Carly!" realising what it was that made Carly scream, Tully ran towards her daughter's direction with the two other girls. A stray walker who had emerged somewhere from the thick vegetation on side of the road had yanked Carly out of her mother's reach. Only her adrenaline was giving the exhausted Tully the strength to move now as she ran towards her screaming daughter. Although the walker's body was significantly rotten, it was strong and put up quite a fight, preventing Jamie, Molly and Tully to take it down. With no sharp object in her hand, Tully had no other choice but to use her gun. She fired it at the walker, blowing off its head and saving Carly.

However, the noise that the gunfire had made only alerted the swamp of walkers approaching them fast and the time it took to fight off a single walker enabled the herd to catch up to them. "Are you okay?" Tully asked her daughter, checking Carly for any signs of injury.

"My ankle hurts," teary-eyed, Carly admitted and when Tully inspected the said ankle for any injuries, Tully was horrified to see Carly's left ankle bent in a very bad way.

"I'm so sorry honey, I'm sorry but you gotta hold on, I'll treat it as soon as we get away from the herd," comforted Tully as she picked up Carly.

"Mommy!" Molly's screams alerted Tully who felt almost frightened to realize that the herd had caught up and they were almost surrounded. One grabbed Molly who was within its reach and Jamie was there to pull her sister from its grasp. However, there were so many of them and Tully and her girls found themselves surrounded.

Tully and her girls didn't even notice the sudden sound of vehicle engines coming from the direction they have been running to. The convoy of vehicles were instantly greeted with the sight of a large herd and the sound of gunfire coming from one particular direction where the walkers of the herd were headed to. Soon, the gunfire was accompanied by the sound of hair-raising screams as more gunfire followed. This time, the gunfire was coming from the convoy to aid the current victims of the herd. One of those people who was trying his hardest to fight off the herd was none other than Negan, armed with Lucille. He recognized the voice and the names that the voice was screaming out. He'd never heard Tully scream in his life before but his instincts told him that the horrified, hair-raising scream was coming from a very helpless Tully.

Back in the middle of the heard and surrounded by hungry walkers, Tully found herself trying her hardest to fight off every walker that tried to yank her children from her. However, it was difficult to defend three people and yourself against a hundred hungry corpses that are very much alive. She didn't even notice the gunfire coming from another direction nor did she realized the fact that she was surrounded by the unbearable stench of death coming from the creatures surrounding her. Tully's main priority was to take Carly back from the walker that yanked her off her arms and make sure her other two girls are safe. With no bullets left, her gun was useless to Tully and with no weapon within her reach, she only had her hands. The walker who had taken Carly off her grasp groaned weakly as Tully hit it across the head with her own fist. Its head was so badly deteriorated that she easily punctured its skull with her own fist. It collapsed on the ground, taking Carly down with it. However, before Tully could get to her, walkers swarmed all over the fallen walker and Carly. The last thing Tully heard was Carly's gurgled scream and then there was nothing but the moans of the walkers surrounding her.

Tully couldn't even digest the fact that she just failed to protect Carly because the sound of Jamie's screaming her name and Molly yanking her arm snapped Tully back to reality. In horror, she watched a couple of walkers drag Jamie out of her grasp and just next to her, another took Molly. As Tully attempted to take Molly back, she realized that it was no walker who grabbed Molly but a man she recognized as Negan. Without acknowledging Negan, Tully turned towards Jamie, knowing she cannot fail her like she failed Carly. Ignoring Negan's warnings that it was too dangerous, Tully run towards the direction where Jamie and the walkers who had grabbed her had disappeared into. She could see a hand sticking out amongst the crowd of walkers. She knew it was a child's hand, her child's hand, and in a desperate attempt to save Jamie, Tully tried her hardest to grabbed the hand. However, as it turned out, that was all that's left of Jamie.

In shock and in disbelief, Tully stared at the hand she held as the group of walkers finished devouring what was left of Jamie and the others followed the smell of blood coming from the direction of the detached hand that Tully held. Tully didn't even realise that she was being swarmed by a bunch of walkers too until she heard the sound of gunshots. She felt a pair of strong hands yank her away from the swarm's eager grasp. Weak, exhausted and miserable, Tully didn't even care if she had been grabbed by another walker or a human being. She was taken away from the herd as the rest of the Saviors eliminated the walkers. A familiar face loomed above her face and Tully smiled weakly as she blinked back at Negan.

He opened his mouth and said something she couldn't quite understand because she was still temporarily deaf from the gunfire. He looked troubled. Tully never saw Negan look so very troubled before. Her eyes rolled back as she closed them tiredly. She was exhausted, she'd never been tired like this before. She held back a sob because she was too tired to even cry. When she opened her eyes again, she saw a Savior handing Negan a hatchet. Negan looked visibly upset as he spoke some more but Tully could not hear. She followed his gaze and her tired eyes landed on her left arm where she found a large chunk of her flesh missing from her forearm. She had been bitten and she didn't even feel it!

Then, thinking he had warned her enough, Negan hacked her bitten arm off with the hatchet provided to him. This time, Tully felt the pain immediately and a scream escaped her lips as Negan cut off her arm in a desperate attempt to save her. The entire time, a very terrified Molly watched Tully scream in agony while being held down by a couple of Saviors while Negan continued to hack off her arm.

The excessive amount of blood started pouring out seconds after Negan successfully cut Tully's bitten arm off. Desperate to get some help for her, Negan let the rest of his men take care of the what was left of the herd while he loaded Tully and Molly into a vehicle. As he carried the very weak Tully, he felt her tight grip on his arm with her uninjured hand. "Negan," she said weakly, "I think the baby's coming," she said shakily in between sobs.

Negan didn't want to believe her but as he put her half conscious body down at the back of the vehicle, he was greeted with the sight of her jeans soaked in blood and he knew very well that the blood didn't come from her limb injury but from somewhere else.

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 **i hope this chapter was "enjoyable" lol, it was certainly very intense to write  
i'd like to see what you guys think so don't forget to drop a REVIEW to let me know :)**


	24. Chapter 24

**hey everyone! i'm sorry for breaking all your hearts after last chapter, especially after that season premier**

 **sorry for the late update too, i'm a little busy at the moment with my semester at uni about to end in a few weeks so my updates might be a little delayed/ slow. anyways, i hope you will all enjoy this chapter and don't forget to drop a review :)**

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Tully was woken up by the sound of her own scream. She was so sure that what she had dreamt about was real. The numerous amount of walkers grabbing every part of her body, their bony fingers were cold and their putrid scent was so very strong. However, when she opened her eyes, the first thing she saw was the plain white ceiling. Relieved that it was just a bad dream, Tully sat up weakly. The first thing she noticed was the fact that it had been so easy for her to sit up…there was no bump that gave her any difficulty. In shock, she felt her belly and while doing so, she noticed the second thing that was missing from her…her left hand, in fact, her entire left forearm was missing and what was left of her arm was covered in thick bandages.

All the memories rushed back to her, they were unwelcomed but the painfully horrid memories forced their way back to her, reminding her of that terrible night. Suddenly, Tully wished that she still asleep. She wished that she was having a terrible nightmare and she was ready to wake up but everything was very much real. Lying back down on the bed, Tully wiped the tears off her face as she held back her sobs.

The sound of footsteps momentarily disturbed Tully. Quickly, she sat up and saw Patrick entering the infirmary. He seemed surprised to see her awake and he didn't fail to let her know about it. "I thought that the next time I see you up, you'd be a walker," admitted Patrick.

"Where's everyone?" Tully wanted to know.

"Your daughter is with Sherry-…"

Tully didn't know whether to feel relieved or mortified. Patrick said daughter…not daughters. So she had recalled things correctly, she had lost two of her girls. "Molly?"

"Yes, Molly," replied the older man. "I'm sorry about the other two, I know its hard," he added.

"How about Negan?"

"He's with the baby." Now her ears perked up upon hearing Patrick utter the word 'baby'. In an instant, Tully was out of the bed and demanding Patrick where she can find Negan.

"He's at the back of the building but I suggest that you leave him alone for a while, he wanted to be alone," replied Patrick. "You'll get to have your turn with the baby eventually." Tully didn't quite understand what he meant. However, she ignored Patrick's warning and left the infirmary to see Negan and her baby. The very idea that Negan was alone with her baby scared Tully a little. What if he refused to give the baby to her?

With her adrenaline pumping, Tully raced to the back of the building where Patrick informed her Negan was. She couldn't even feel the physical pain of her missing limb as she hurriedly rushed to get her baby. As soon as she found herself at the back of the building, in the most secluded of all the areas in the Sanctuary, she found a familiar man donning a black leather jacket. He carried something bundled up in a blanket in one hand while his other held a shovel.

"What are you doing?!" breathlessly, the motherly side of Tully took over. She raced towards Negan and tried to snatch the baby he held. He didn't stop her, instead, he let her take the baby off him. His face was void of all emotions as he watched her but the gasp that escaped Tully's lips made the hairs at the back of Negan's neck rise. He could feel her agony in that one simply gasp.

"Oh no, no, no," she sobbed as she cradled her child in her arms. Her baby, Negan Junior, was so small. He was no bigger than her hand and the moment she looked at her pasty little angel, she knew in her heart that she woke up a little too late. She wasn't even able to cradle him while he was still alive nor feed him his last meal.

"He was alive when you gave birth to him prematurely," said Negan, "it was a fucking miracle." He watched as the weeping Tully cradled her baby with her uninjured arm. "But he can't stay alive for long, he wasn't ready to be out so early. He fought hard though and I'm not fucking sure where he got the spirit to do so, whether it's from me or you."

He allowed her to hold her dead baby in her arms for the last time while he dug their child's final resting place at the back of the Sanctuary. He could hear her quiet sobs and although he wasn't looking at her, he knew that her face was full of agony. Several minutes passed before Negan dug a hole deep enough to serve as their baby's final resting place.

"It's time," he told her but she would not let go.

"Give me a few more minutes to hold him," she said between sobs. Their baby was so small and so premature that he looked so fragile. She wondered what his eye colour was…did he have Negan's warm brown eyes or her eyes? Did he have dimples like his father? Shakily, Tully pressed one last kiss on her unmoving baby. His body was already cold and she hated that she wasn't even able to feel how warm he would've been in her arms.

"I want to name him Charles, after my father," she told Negan as she finally handed the baby over to him. "Negan Charles Junior, my sweet little angel."

He said nothing, simply because he didn't know what to say anymore. Instead, he began to put their child to his final resting place with a crying Tully watching him do so. They didn't exchange any words the whole time and when Negan finally finished, he left her with no attempt to comfort her.

* * *

Tully didn't have the guts to go and see her only child left. God only knows how long she stayed in her baby's grave, crying her eyes out until her head was throbbing from it. She just lost three of her children. People around her have done worse things…why is it her that fate decided to punish? They were escaping…they were on a quest to find a new home, a better sanctuary, but in a blink of an eye, destiny had turned Tully's life into shit. She didn't know what to tell Molly. In fact, Tully have no idea how to even face Molly. She was a failure and she didn't deserve to be called a mother after what happened that horrid night. Whenever she saw the bandages that covers the open wound of her amputated arm, Tully was often reminded of her loss and she hated it…she hated that she failed as a mother.

Seeking comfort, Tully found herself leaving her baby's grave several hours later. Tully wanted to see Negan. She just lost their baby and the girls they have treated as their own. Even if she almost tried to killed him and betrayed him in the process during the same night of their loss, she needed him to be by her side. He was so excited for their baby and she feared that their loss has broken his heart as severely as it broke hers. He cared for Carly and Jamie so much that she can't imagine what he must've felt. In fact, she can't imagine Negan being broken.

Tully made her way to the place she predicted she would find Negan, his bedroom. However, much to her surprise, the room was empty. Disappointed to see him absent from his room, she hurriedly made her way to his office. She was not exactly sure why she was desperate to see him…she just wanted to see him…to make sure he's okay. As it turned out, Negan was not in his office as well, leaving Tully with no option but to ask around. The first person she came across was none other than Dwight. Judging by the expression on Dwight's face, he was aware of Tully's unfortunate loss and before Tully could even ask him about Negan's whereabouts, Dwight addressed her recent loss.

"I shouldn't have given you that gun, I'm sorry, I really am," he told her. He looked guilty and regretful but deep in her heart, Tully knew that her loss was her fault and not his'. She was the one who made the move after all, she was the one who took her children to their doom.

"What's done is done," Tully responded quietly. She didn't want to talk about the topic anymore and immediately asked her initial question, wondering where Negan was.

"He's up in the rooftop," Dwight informed her, "but I think it's best if you stay away, he's not in a very good mood." Tully disregarded Dwight's advice of course. Soon enough, she found herself in the very rooftop where she used to spend chilly evenings in the company of Negan. It's where she would tell him about herself, about her old life before the outbreak and Negan would listen intently. It's where she had gotten to know him too. It was during those times when she realised that the leader of the Sanctuary was so very human too.

She found him sitting in the middle of the rooftop with empty alcohol containers surrounding him. His back faced her and Tully suddenly hesitated. All of the sudden, she wasn't sure whether she should approach him or not. Suddenly, she felt like she should've followed Dwight's advice.

Sensing that he was no longer alone, Negan spoke, telling her to 'fuck off'. "It's me," finally, Tully managed to utter out, informing Negan that it was her with him and not somebody else. He didn't acknowledge her and instead, he took a swig of the bottle of alcohol he held in his hand. Tully felt like shit. She also didn't like the fact that he was making her feel like shit…she wanted him to get up and pull her in his arms, to comfort her and tell her it will be okay. She wanted the jovial, dirty-mouthed Negan and not this depressed, drunk Negan.

"I want you to know that I'm sorry," she continued, staring at his broad back clad in leather.

Negan scoffed. "Now you're fucking sorry," he muttered. He got up from his seat with his half empty bottle of whisky in his hand. He approached her slowly, the way he walked made her realise that he was drunk. She wondered how long he'd been in the rooftop, drinking. "It's your fucking fault the girls died. You fucking took them to their motherfucking doom. It your fucking fault you gave birth prematurely too and now the baby is fucking dead. Everything is your own fucking fault!" he shouted at her. His words stung, simply because Tully knew that it was the truth.

Teary-eyed, she looked at him. She came to him, hoping he would comfort her after their loss but instead, her heart was more broken now. "I'm sorry," she tried her hardest not to cry in front of him as she apologised. As soon as she got the words out of her mouth, Tully left the rooftop hastily.

She ended up in the infirmary. With no intention to see Molly or spend the rest of the night outside the infirmary, Tully decided that she might as well sleep. She hoped that sleep would take her misery away. She wished that when she wakes up tomorrow, all her problems would disappear. However, sleeping was harder than Tully anticipated. Tully couldn't sleep. Whenever she closed her eyes, she would remember the traumatising event that occurred the night she lost three of her children. She could hear Carly's gurgled scream as she screamed for help while walkers devoured her. She remembered holding Jamie's dismembered hand. She remembered the various faces of the monsters, their stench…

Unable to sleep, Tully left the bed. She found Patrick, watching her with narrowed eyes. He seemed hesitant to leave her by herself in the infirmary unless Negan ordered him to keep an eye on her but as far as she was concerned, Negan no longer cared about her.

Patrick asked her what she wanted. "I can't sleep, do you have any sleeping pills?" Tully inquired.

Patrick said nothing as he got up from his seat. He left her standing in the middle of the infirmary as he disappeared inside a room connected to the infirmary that served as the room containing all medicinal supplies. He came back after a few minutes with a small glass bottle in one hand. He handed it to her, looking very stern. "They're very strong so only take one," said Patrick. Tully nodded her head quickly. "I'm going to bed, if you're going to spend the night here, make sure you keep an eye out. I locked the medicine room for the night but some morons like to try their luck sometimes."

"Okay," murmured Tully.

She watched the older man leave the room and as soon as he was out of sight, Tully opened the small bottle containing the pills and poured almost a handful of the small white pills in her hand, ignoring Patrick's instruction earlier.


	25. Chapter 25

Tully woke up to the sound of someone calling her name continuously and the slight tapping on her cheeks. As she regained consciousness slowly, the first thing she saw were a pair of brown eyes blinking back at her. She recognised those warm brown eyes as Negan's immediately. "Are you a fucking idiot?" he barked at her once he realised she had woken up. "Patrick had been trying to wake you up for the past three hours. Molly thinks you're fucking dead," he exclaimed, clearly annoyed. There was no longer alcohol in his breath, she noticed.

He waved something in front of her face and Tully quickly recognised the half empty container in his hand containing the strong sleeping pills she had taken the night before. As Tully looked at Negan's scowling face, she remembered the reason why she took such a strong amount of medication. She remembered their losses and she remembered how much of a disappointment she had been. Suddenly, she wished she can close her eyes and go back to sleep once more. Ashamed, she avoided his gaze that made her feel like he was scrutinizing her. "I'm sorry," in a little voice, she murmured.

"You should be," Negan responded back, raising his voice. "I found Molly crying her fucking eyes out. She thought you were fucking dead because you wouldn't wake up. I thought you care about her-…"

"I do," in a little voice, she interrupted him. He was glaring at her now and Tully didn't quite like the way he was looking at her. She felt like he was judging her with that look on his face.

"Well you better start acting like you fucking do!" he barked at her. Tully cringed and closed her eyes. Her head was pounding and Negan yelling at her wasn't helping.

"Get away from my Mommy!" shouted another voice and all Tully saw was a flash of red from Molly's hair when she opened her teary eyes again.

Upon witnessing Negan yell at her defenceless mother, Molly quickly rushed to protect Tully from what she thought was Negan's abuse. She pushed Negan away and although the man towered over her, he stumbled back as result of his shock.

"Don't yell at my Mommy, can't you see, she's sad," said Molly. She turned to her adoptive mother and grabbed Tully's hand, forcing her out of her seat and dragging her out of the infirmary. Negan was left alone there, speechless and stumped. Just like Negan, Tully too was in shock.

"Honey, are you okay?" she found herself asking Molly once they were far away from Negan. She realised that Molly was taking her to their old room, the room she once shared with all her children.

"We have to go, Mommy," said Molly as they walked through the empty corridors. Her words confused Tully. What exactly does she mean? Molly remained quiet for the rest of the way to their room but as soon as they entered their room and the door was shut, Tully was able to look at her daughter properly for the first time. Like her, it seemed like the incident had taken its toll on Molly. There were bags under the girls' eyes and even her eyes looked different…as if the glint of innocence was no longer present in her daughter's eyes.

"I don't like Mr. Negan anymore, Mommy," admitted Molly once they were in the privacy of their room. "He did that to you, I saw it," claimed Molly as she pointed at Tully's amputated arm, "you were screaming and crying and you were telling him 'please stop' but he wouldn't," she recounted, recalling the series of events she witnessed that frightful night.

"But I was bit, honey," explained Tully, "he had to do it or I will turn."

"But it's wrong to hurt someone you love!" argued Molly. "He was hurting you, you were crying," she recounted, "and today, he was screaming at you and you were crying." Tully looked at the girl standing before her, speechless. "He's a bad man, Mommy. We have to go. I don't like this place anymore and I'm scared of him. What if he hurts you again? What if he takes you away from me? I don't want to lose my Mommy."

Tully kneeled before Molly so that they were looking at each other eye to eye. "We can't leave," she admitted, "look Molly, sweetie, I made the mistake once trying to leave this place and look what happened? I can't lose you, you're the only one I have left. I'm scared that as soon as we step out of the Sanctuary's big gates, I'll lose you too. I can't afford that, okay? Do you understand me?"

"But-…"

"Negan did what he had to do to me, I have to lose my arm to live," she came to Negan's defence. "Don't be scared of him, he cares about you, a lot. He'll keep us safe here."

Molly looked at her strangely, as if she was suddenly unsure whether she was talking to the same person she had spent many, many months with. Tully's response was certainly not what she expected from her mother…at least not the Tully who adopted her. However, Molly said nothing anymore. She loves her mother and she trusts Tully.

"I promise you I'll do anything to protect you. I won't make the same mistakes as before anymore," Tully told the young girl as she used her good, uninjured arm to embrace Molly tightly.

* * *

Tully spent most of the day with Molly in their room. The little girl had missed her and was apparently tired of spending time with Sherry and the other wives. So, they occupied themselves playing board games and Tully reading books to Molly all day. Molly was all she had left and Tully hated the fact that Molly had to grow up fast as the result of the apocalypse. She had definitely learned her lesson now and she will no longer do anything so stupid to risk the life of her only child.

They retired to bed early that evening and it only took a few minutes before she felt Molly's body begin to relax next to her and Tully was certain that Molly had fallen asleep. For a while, Tully stared at the ceiling, surrounded by darkness and waiting for sleep to take over until her eyelids grew heavily and unknowingly, her eyes closed and sleep took over her.

 _"I promise you girls, we'll find a place, a better place." Tully recognised the voice as her own voice, speaking in confidence._

 _"I'm scared, Mom," spoke another voice. Tully immediately recognised the voice as Carly's. It was very dark and as Tully looked around, she saw nothing but pitch black surrounding her. However, after Carly had spoke, she notice a sliver of light appear before her, illuminating the dark room. Tully realised that she was still her room but Molly was nowhere near her where she had fallen asleep. "You said you'll look after us," continued Carly as Tully looked around again. Now the sliver of light before her gave her better visibility but as she looked around, she realised that she was alone…until she felt a pair of cold hands on her shoulders._

 _Tully looked in horror as she realised that there was a walker before her holding her shoulders firmly with a deadly grip. The walker was small, it was just a child and its decaying features were so recognisable that it left Tully feeling chills down her spine. "C-Carly?"_

 _"You said you'll look after us!" screamed the decomposing cadaver. Despite the fact that its features appear to be Carly's, it's voice suddenly sounded like Jamie's. "You lied! You lied!" it screamed. Behind her, Tully felt another hand grab a handful of her hair, forcing her to look over her shoulder. She saw another decaying corpse but this one appeared to be Jamie's with one of its hands missing. In its good hand, it held a skeleton of a tiny creature…a little human being. "You killed us!" it screamed._

"I'm sorry! I'm sorry!" said Tully as she blinked back her tears. As she wiped the tears off her eyes, she realised that the speaking corpses were gone and she realised that it was only a dream as she turned over and saw Molly's sleeping face. It felt so real that Tully woke up with her heart racing. She swore she could still feel the corpse's tight grip on her shoulders. She sat up weakly and cried, burying her face in her hands. "I'm sorry," she murmured, talking to no one.

It took minutes, or perhaps hours, before Tully's tears finally subsided. Tully glanced at Molly who was sleeping soundly. She needed comfort, Tully thought but the idea of waking Molly in the late hours of the evening just to be comforted by her made her feel cruel. Molly needed sleep and she can't deprive her of that. Sighing sadly to herself, Tully lied back down and stared blankly at the ceiling. She was too afraid to fall asleep.

She had no idea how long she had been staring at the ceiling but eventually, Tully found herself leaving the room. Her wandering feet led her to the direction of Negan's bedroom. As she stopped in front of his door, she hesitated. Sighing heavily to herself, Tully knocked quietly. She took a step back afterwards and waited. Tully counted up to ten in her head and when he didn't open the door by the time she finished counting, she decided to go back to her room. However, as soon as she turned around, she heard the door creak open.

Tully didn't know what made her do it but she quickly turned around and leaped into his arms. She was greeted by his familiar musky, leathery scent and as she held onto him tightly, she realised that he was clad merely in his pants. The skin to skin contact and their physical closeness made Tully realise that she had missed him so much. He said nothing as he closed the door with her in his arms. He climbed his bed with her still clinging onto him. He said nothing as she began to wet his bare chest with her tears and instead, he wrapped his arms firmly around her and held her close.

He let her cry in his arms. All her defences were down and she was so very vulnerable. "I dreamt about them," she murmured quietly. If the room wasn't so quiet, he wouldn't have heard her. "I told them I'll take care of them. I told them I'll find a better place for them," in between sobs, she claimed. "They called me a liar."

"It was just a bad dream, Candy," he said as he ran his hand gently up and down her back. "It wasn't real."

She sniffled as she looked at him. Weakly, she smiled at him as she held his face between her hands. She noticed his salt and pepper coloured scruff, she noticed his furrowed eyebrows and above all, she saw his warm brown eyes looking back at her. "I'm sorry," she told him. "I know you blame me for losing the baby along with Carly and Jamie," she found herself telling him as the small, weak smile on her face diminished.

"Shit happens, Candy, it's not your fault," responded Negan without glancing her way. If he was attempting to comfort her and make her feel less guilty with his words, Tully was far from feeling comforted. His words last night when he was drunk contradicted his words now that he was sober and Tully remembered the saying the drunk people are the honest ones. "Lucille had four miscarriages," Negan said, talking about his deceased wife. It was the second rare occasion where he mentioned his wife to Tully. "We tried so fucking hard and by the end of it all, I truly believed that I'll never be a father. I wanted to make myself feel better so I cheated on her. I fucked countless of whores even when she had been diagnosed with cancer. It was a stupid mistake I made and I regret that now but like I said, shit fucking happens, Candy. You gotta understand that we make mistakes and that night was one of those instances."

Deep inside her, she thought that he no longer wanted her and she felt hopeless that she can't do anything to bring their baby and Jamie and Carly back. She looked at him sadly. She wasn't sure why the thought of losing Negan too was so daunting to her. She wasn't even the only woman in his life! Is it a sign that she was in love with him?

He reached for her face with one of his hands and wiped her tear stained cheeks. "Please don't hate me," she said.

His gaze on her softened. "I wanted to fucking hate you," he admitted. "I wanted to hurt you after that night," he told her, "but I fucking care for you so fucking much Candy that I can't do all those things to you," he admitted. "Be strong Candy, be strong for Molly and for me." He pressed his lips against hers and he kissed her tenderly. They have not kissed for so long that Tully realised she had missed the sensations that kissing him would make her feel. She kissed him back lovingly, feeling nothing but bliss and for once, Tully finally realised that night that she was truly in love with Negan.

She snuggled close to him after the kiss they shared with her head resting against his chest. She listened to the sound of his heartbeat and felt like she found the comfort that she was craving. "Please stay with me," she murmured as she held onto his arm. "Don't leave me. I need you," she admitted.

"I won't go anywhere," he responded back. "Between the two of us, you're the one who needs to stay. What do you want me to do to make you do that? What do you want me to do to stop you from leaving me again?" he said.

"Just hold me," murmured Tully and that was exactly what Negan did. Satisfied and comforted, Tully let out a sigh. She can smell him, she can feel his warmth…she felt good…she felt like all her troubles were gone. How can Negan's simple embrace do something like that to her?

She was thinking about the answer to that question as she sat up and looked down at him. He was looking back at her, clearly wondering why she had sat up so suddenly. Without a word, she shakily peeled her clothes off her body one by one. For once, she initiated the act. Negan said nothing, not even a perverted comment that his jovial character would usually do. Instead, she felt his big, warm, calloused hands against her skin along with his warm lips with his stubble gently brushing against her goose bump covered skin. She wanted him…she wanted to feel all of him…screw Patrick's advice that it was too risky for her to have sexual intercourse just after giving birth. She needed to feel him because she truly believed that he was all she needed to feel alive again. Is it a sign that she was truly in love with him?


	26. Chapter 26

No amount of painkillers could relieve the physical pain that Tully's missing forearm was causing her. It was always throbbing and hot but she had to endure it, it was a part of her life now. The constant pain wasn't the only thing that made it difficult for her to do everyday things, it was also the fact that she only had one hand left to do the things she had once taken for granted that made things hard. The morning after Tully spent the night with Negan, she experienced it first hand how difficult it was to do things she was so used to doing with her two hands before. She figured she was well enough to go back to working in the kitchen. However, even the simple task of chopping vegetables was difficult with her right hand. She was a left-hander and using her least dominant hand to do simple things was very challenging for Tully, especially when she knew she had to get such simple task done quickly.

Everyone else in the kitchen noticed that she was struggling of course. Jenny came to her rescue, offering to finish the task for her. Tully felt ashamed and useless…she can't even cut vegetables as fast as she was meant to. A task that would normally take her a couple of minutes lasted almost ten. "You're probably just still feeling weak and tired, why don't you go and rest," offered Jenny as she took over Tully's job.

Tully said nothing to disagree with Jenny, instead, she followed Jenny's advice. She knew that they were just trying to be nice and understanding. On her way out of the kitchen, everyone in the kitchen assured her that they will be fine without her and that she should take some time off to get better. Tully knew they pitied her. Nobody wanted to suffer from the terrible consequences she had suffered from as a result of her impulsive decision to leave the Sanctuary.

She eventually found herself in the bedroom she now shared with just Molly. There was no sign of Molly and she assumed that the little girl was somewhere, playing. She spotted a small pile of laundry waiting to be folded in the corner of the room and to make herself feel less useless, Tully occupied herself with the task. Just like the simple tasks in the kitchen, folding the laundry with one hand was slow and hard. Tully felt herself getting frustrated and it wasn't until she felt her nose getting runny that she realised that she had been crying.

"Stupid hand," frustrated, she muttered under her breath as she wiped her nose with the back of her right hand.

Another hand reached forward and grabbed the shirt she had been trying to fold off her lap. Quickly, Tully looked up and she instantly realized that it was Negan. Lazily, he sat on the floor across from her and began to fold the clothes for her with Tully watching him…in fact, she was gawking at him. "Since when did you learn how to fold clothes?" she blurted out, well aware that Negan doesn't do any chores. It was a job reserved for those who had to do it to earn daily points.

He looked at her. "I always knew how to fucking fold clothes, Candy," he chuckled. He finished folding one of Molly's shorts and placed it on top of the pile of folded clothes she started. "Now tell me, why are you crying this time?"

She clamped her mouth shut instantly. She blinked back at him, he was patiently waiting for her reply but Tully felt too embarrassed to tell him that she had been crying out of frustration. "I wasn't, my nose was just runny," she reasoned out. He was unconvinced but said nothing. "Why are you here?" this time, she was the one asking him a question.

She watched him as he took a number of things out of the pocket of his jacket. "Patrick said that you haven't paid him a visit to get your bandages changed," he explained, "so I'm here to get the job done because you're fucking stubborn."

She said nothing anymore. Instead, she let him hold her bandaged, amputated arm as he meticulously and carefully peeled the old bandages off. He was very gentle as he cleaned her wound and he would immediately stop whenever he would feel her flinch. Tully never really imagined Negan would be this gentle and caring…especially after how much pain she knew she caused him after their loss. She began to wonder whether he had truly forgiven her. Tully wanted to ask but she held back.

"This might hurt a little," he warned her as he dabbed some solution on her wound. He was very careful not to maximise the pain she was feeling while at the same time, he was doing the task so meticulously to make sure that her wound would heal properly. "Negan," she murmured quietly as she watched him finish bandaging her amputated arm, "thank you."

He stopped what he was doing and looked at her with a smile on his face. It was his dimpled, charming smile that she loved. It was the smile she always wished their baby would have. "For what?" he wondered.

"For everything," she claimed. He grinned and she found herself reaching forward and touching his cheek with her right hand. She could feel his stubble against her palm and she enjoyed that feeling.

"See, now that's what I'd like to see!" he exclaimed loudly as he pointed at her face. "I haven't seen you smile like this for a very long time, Candy and it's fucking beautiful." She didn't even realised that she was smiling until he pointed it out. With her arm now bandaged, she carefully wrapped both her arms around him and embraced him tightly. She opened her mouth, she was very close to telling him she loves him but before she could, Tully clamped her mouth shut and inhaled in his scent.

* * *

 **hey everyone! sorry for such a short chapter but don't worry, i'll make it up to you all on my next update**

 **speaking of chapters, it's very sad for me to say that there's only a few chapters left :( i can't believe this story is ending :'(**

 **anyways, don't forget to drop a REVIEW and let me know what you think :)**


	27. Chapter 27

**hey everyone, i firstly wanna apologise for my super duper late update. i know its been weeks since my last update and some of you have been waiting**

 **so thank you for your patience, i lost my wifi access because i'm a typical broke uni student lol, hopefully i'll get it back soon but for now, i'll try to visit the library for free wifi as often**

 **anways, hopefully you'll enjoy this chapter :)**

* * *

Tully was busy preparing hers and Molly's bed one evening, she was struggling to do such a simple chore with one hand when Molly ran inside the room. The girl panted heavily, attempting to catch her breath. "Mommy, mommy," she ran towards Tully, "I saw Mr. Negan with Amber," she claimed, "he was kissing her and he was taking her clothes off!"

The idea of Negan kissing another woman seemed distressing for Molly. Tully would be lying if she claimed it didn't hurt her to learn that Negan was still sleeping with his other wives. However, she knew by now that he would sleep with the other wives as a way of making the other men in those women's lives jealous, especially those men who were once in a relationship with the wives. It was Negan's own way of showing off his dominance over everyone else as the leader of the Sanctuary. It irked her though because she was once again starting to think that she was special to him…especially with the way that their relationship seemed to be headed to the right direction lately.

"It's okay, honey," forcing a smile on her face, Tully assured Molly. "Amber is also Negan's wife," she explained.

Molly occupied the empty spot next to Tully on the floor. "I thought Mr. Negan loves you," she murmured, she sounded disappointed, "he wouldn't have hurt you like he did, Mom," she added, staring at what was left of Tully's left limb. "And he should only have one wife, not many."

"He's a complicated man, Molly," explained Tully.

"I don't want to live here anymore Mommy, Mr. Negan scares me," after a couple of seconds of silence, Molly announced. Clearly, she had not forgotten watching Negan hack off her mother's arm with a hatchet while Tully screamed in pain. It had been a traumatic experience for Molly. After all, throughout the months she had known Tully, she saw her adoptive mother as nothing but a strong woman who cannot be touched by pain or danger and she thought Negan wouldn't do anything to hurt her.

"It's gonna be okay, you'll be fine, as long as I'm here," assured Tully. However, while her words assured Molly, it did little to assure her. She used to say the exact same words to Carly and Jamie too and what happened to them? She got them killed. No longer wanting to talk about Negan, Tully motioned for Molly to go to sleep. "You had a pretty long day, go and rest." However, instead of following her mother's orders, Molly proceeded to help Tully with the unfinished chore.

"Don't you want to leave this place too, Mommy," asked Molly. "Did you changed your mind?"

"I'm only doing what's best for you, Molly. Please try to understand, I can't lose you," explained Tully. That was the end of their discussion about it for the night because as soon as they both got their makeshift bed ready, they went to bed. However, while Molly slept soundly in her mother's arms, Tully thought relentlessly about Molly's words until she fell asleep.

* * *

The following day, Tully paid her baby's grave a visit after breakfast. Tully was never religious. However, every morning, she would visit the grave and pray that her children were in a better place. If there was a god listening to her, she hoped that they would listen to her prayer and make sure her children were safe, wherever they were.

Tully left afterwards with the intention of finding Molly. She found herself heading inside the building, wondering where Molly was. Tully's steps slowed down when she caught sight of a group of people in the lobby on her way to the room. Instantly, her instincts told her that something was wrong. Much to her complete horror, Tully discovered what was happening as soon as she joined the crowd. There was Negan holding Lucille in his hand. Lucille, his precious baseball bat covered in barbed wire, was stained with blood and what appeared to be a pretty big chunk of flesh. On the ground, suffering from Negan's brutality was one of his thugs, heavily maimed by still very much alive. Negan continued to beat the helpless man with his bat as the crowd looked on, including Tully. A minute later and the man he'd been beating with his bat was dead.

She looked in horror at the body. Memories came flooding back to her head about that frightful day when she first witnessed what Lucille could do to her victims. Tully shifted her gaze from the dead man on the ground and towards Negan who was looking very smugly at the person he just killed. Amongst the crowd, just behind Negan stood a very mortified girl.

Something within Tully snapped when she saw Molly across from her. The sight of her horrified face made her feel like a complete failure. During her sister's dying moments, she assured Emily that she was going to find a safe place for the girls. Tully thought she succeeded when she joined Negan's group and found the Sanctuary. However, as it turned out, it was not the safe haven she was looking for. She lost three children at once in an attempt to leave. As Tully looked at Molly's frightened face, she realised that not only did she failed her three dead children miserably but also her only living child.

It was a known fact that she had misjudged the Sanctuary but above all, she had misjudged Negan. She had given Negan a chance to be a better person and leader. She wanted him to be a better person so badly and she even hoped that their baby would change his brutality but Tully now had to wake up from her hopeless fantasy. You can't always tame a monster.

The Sanctuary was nowhere near the safe haven she first thought it was. The body of the man Negan just killed in front of everyone, including poor Molly who was only a child, was a proof of it. In fact, the signs were everywhere but Tully had either been too ignorant or too gullible to notice them all. She should've realised that she had taken her girls to a terrible place when she discovered that a social hierarchy existed and equality was non-existent within the compound. In fact, she should've considered the fact that Negan's harem of wives and henchmen raised red flags that indicate the terrible quality of life in the Sanctuary.

Tully turned her gaze back to Negan. She was disappointed but above all, she was angry. Recently, she admitted to herself that she was in love with him. Was that the reason why she had been willing to give Negan a chance to be a better person? She had come back to her senses now and she was absolutely done with him. He was toxic, his leadership was unfair and the whole philosophy that surrounded it was outrageous. She looked at the teary-eyed Molly who was looking at Negan in horror. Tully may be in love with Negan but her number one priority was Molly. After all, her child's needs comes before hers and if Molly needed a safe environment, she needed to fulfil that before her need to be with the man she was in love with.

* * *

Negan, who was announcing to everyone the consequences when people commit rape under his watch, momentarily paused when he saw Tully walking up the stairs with Molly in tow. A few minutes later, with a bloody Lucille still in his hand, Negan made his way to the girls' bedroom and saw Tully comforting Molly.

"Don't you dare come in here with that thing," her cold voice addressed him. By the tone of her voice and the deadly look on her face, Negan knew that he won't be dealing with the broken Tully who was heartbroken about losing her three children but instead, the Tully standing before him was the same gusty, dangerous woman who tried to steal from him all those months ago, the woman who was not afraid to challenge him, the same woman who tried to shoot him.

Negan left his baseball bat outside the room before stepping inside, ignoring Tully's cold glare aimed at him. While he missed the gutsy woman, a part of Negan almost immediately missed the weak woman her losses her turned her into, the woman who would want to be in his arms all the time, the woman who cried all the time. He approached her with the intention of speaking to the shaken Molly who was clearly distressed by what she witnessed him do to a rapist as punishment.

"Don't touch my daughter!" Tully instantly pulled the girl away from his grasp.

Her action irritated Negan. "She's my fucking daughter too," he told her sharply. He sounded impatient and it was clear that he was not in the mood to argue any longer. Although hesitant, she finally let him talk to the little girl. "Do you know why I did that to him, Molly?" he asked the little girl.

"H-He did something bad to Sandy," Molly replied quietly.

"Yes, he raped Sandy and I don't fucking allow that," Negan pointed out. "Now the asshole got what he deserved. I have to do what I did to punish him, do you understand?" he asked her, his voice was soft and calm. Molly nodded her head. Negan smiled and wiped her tears off her cheeks. "That's my little girl," he grinned. "Remember Molly, bad fucking things happen when my rules are broken." He turned to look at Tully then back to Molly again. "Now will you be okay to stay here for a few minutes while I speak to your mother?"

"Y-Yes," answered Molly before Negan turned his attention to Tully and nodded to the door.

Tully made her way to Negan's office nervously with him following her closely. As soon as they both stepped inside his office, she heard him shut the door noisily, locking it while doing so.

"What do you want to talk about?" she asked as she turned around and faced him.

Negan strolled across the room with Lucille in one hand before he sat on the corner of his desk. "Have a seat, Candy, we'll talk about what happened just then," he told her, motioning for her to sit on the chair across his desk. Awkwardly, Tully complied. "I want to be frank with you, Candy," he started as he watched her occupy the seat tiredly, "I didn't fucking like the way to talked to me in front of Molly," he claimed, the tone of his voice was cold and authoritative. Tully knew that it was Negan the leader of the Saviors speaking to her not the Negan she loved.

"Are you kidding me?" in disbelief, she exclaimed. "You just maimed somebody and one of the people who saw you do it was none other than Molly!" she told him. "Now if you know anything about being a good father, then you should've realised that what you did was wrong. She's only a child Negan."

He folded his arms across his chest and scowled at her. "You're insulting my ability to be a good father and yet, you're the idiot who got three of your children killed." She glared at him after he'd triggered a sensitive nerve with his words.

"Yes, I got them killed and I'm suffering for it every day of my life," shouted Tully, "is that the best you can do to insult me back? You'd bring that up hoping to take a stab at me. Well I got news for you, you're fucking successful so fuck you Negan, fuck you," she bellowed shakily. She was angry at him simply because he knew exactly how to hurt her. "I wish that I never met you and I wish that I don't love you like I do because as far as I'm concerned, those two things are the reason why I'm so miserable." She stormed out of the room, slamming the door shut behind her with such brutal force that it made the ground shake.


	28. Chapter 28

After their verbal argument that escalated in his office, Tully did not see Negan the following day. She did not sleep the night before. She couldn't. When she closed her eyes, she would either be thinking about Negan or the nightmares that would haunt her. As well as that, she was fearful that she would go running back to Negan for comfort if she ever get one of those nightmares, so, Tully forced herself to stay up throughout the night. She knew that she cannot deprive herself of sleep forever and Tully could only think of one solution to fall asleep and avoid the nightmares. Tully figured that some strong sleeping pills like the ones she took before would aid her problem with her nightmares and sleep deprivation.

So, one morning, she found herself in the infirmary while she left Molly with her sister-wives. Patrick, as always, was in the infirmary, guarding the medical supplies. He asked her what she wanted immediately. She explained that she was having trouble sleeping. "I got a few sleeping pills," responded Patrick.

"No," said Tully. "I'm gonna need something stronger than sleeping pills."

She watched Patrick searched around the inventory. "There are some strong sedatives here-…"

"Great," smiled Tully as she peered over his shoulder. "I'll take it from here, Patrick, I can choose which one's the right one for me," she assured the older man who trusted her enough to leave her alone in the medical inventory. As soon as he was out of her sight, Tully quickly emptied the shelf containing the Sanctuary's supply of sedatives and shove in all in the pocket of her hoody.

* * *

"Mommy," Tully turned her attention to Molly as they ate breakfast, sharing a table with Sherry. "I don't wanna be here anymore. When are we leaving?" she asked. A day after Molly witnessed Negan brutally kill someone with his baseball bat, it was obvious that Molly had been traumatised by what she saw. The last time the little girl had seen someone kill somebody so brutally was when the leader of their old group went berserk and violently killed many members of their group, in the end, Tully had to kill him to save everybody. Now, the little girl could not belief that Negan was just as bad as the man who once lead the settlement where she and Tully had come from.

"She's been very sad," claimed Sherry who noticed Molly's lack of enthusiasm during breakfast. "Do you want to play ping-pong with me after breakfast?" trying to make the little girl feel better, Sherry offered.

"That sounds like fun. What do you think?" Tully asked the little girl.

"Are you joining us?" Molly asked her mother in response.

"Well, I'm going to see Negan after breakfast but I'll try to, okay?" Molly nodded her head.

There was no sign of Negan during breakfast and after leaving Molly under her sister-wife's care, Tully decided to see him with some food in hand. There was no sign of Negan in his office and eventually, Tully found herself in his bedroom where she found him drinking alcohol while seated lazily in a recliner. Her presence surprised him of course. A day after their argument, he didn't expect her to come to him.

"I brought you food," claimed Tully as she placed the plateful of food on his bedside table. She sat quietly on his bed and watched him finish his half empty tumbler containing some clear looking liquid that she assumed was alcohol. "I'm sorry about causing a scene in front of Molly," she said although she was far from sorry. She decided she would apologise if it would help him feel better by feeding his ego.

"No need to fucking lie to my face, Candy, I know you're not," he sighed as he got up from his seat. He approached her slowly and he eventually stopped in his tracks to stand in front of her. He was so tall and she felt very small and intimidated. "Don't get too cocky and too over-fucking-confident, Candy, just because you're my wife and I fucking care for you doesn't mean I'm not afraid to ruffle your feathers," he claimed, "I've broken you once, I can do it again."

His words both surprised and irked Tully. He just admitted the reason for her imprisonment that happened a few months ago right in front of her face. He did it to break her. Tully thought she would hate him after hearing it come out of his own mouth but she felt heartbroken instead. There was a time when she was truly convinced that she was special to him. Now she was beginning to doubt how true his claim was when he told her he cared for her.

"The imprisonment you called a punishment, why did you do that to me, Negan? Why do you make my life so difficult ever since I became your wife? Out of all the people in here…"

"Because you're the most difficult person in this whole damn place, Candy," he admitted. He looked down at her with furrowed brows, as if he was trying to understand her as he gazed down at her. "I'm sorry if my actions have hurt you, Candy. I wasn't trying to make your life worse, I was trying to make mine better. I just wanted to keep you here with me and I'm trying very hard to do that because life's a lot less shittier when you're around. You're the best damn thing that happened to me since the world fucking turned into shit," he admitted. His words left Tully feeling stumped. "You're my heaven, Candy. I want you to know that," he claimed, "but I feel like I've become your hell. Why else would you run away from me in the first place?" he spoke so quietly that she barely heard him. In fact, it was as if it was a different person who was speaking to her in that very moment. Can the real Negan even sound so hopeless and heartbroken? He sighed to himself. He looked exhausted. He even sounded exhausted. "What happened to us, Candy? I thought you love me?"

Tully didn't even realise that her tears started pouring until her vision began to blur. She still had feelings for him…feelings she developed since the early stages of their so-called 'marriage' and no matter how many terrible things she witnessed him do, Tully knew that her feelings for him stayed as strong as the very first day she realised she had them. However, her needs came second. Her need to love Negan and be loved by this man came second to her remaining child's needs. She was a mother and Molly's primary needs involved her safety. Unfortunately, Negan or the Sanctuary cannot provide them with that. As much as she badly wanted to stay as Negan's, she had to let him go…Tully had to prioritise Molly's needs and safety over what Tully needed to be happy. She also cannot force Molly to stay in a place she wanted to leave just because she wanted to be with the man she was in love with…that would be selfish, a loving mother would not do that. If her happiness meant being Negan's woman, she had to give that up. Sacrifices…It was a part of motherhood.

"I do love you Negan and I think I always will." She wasn't lying to him or to herself and by the tone of her voice, Negan knew she was being genuine and truthful. "The things I feel when I'm with you, I've never felt those things before," she admitted. "Whenever I regret ever meeting you, I just think of the good times we spent together, I would remember the nights we spent together talking up in the rooftop and I smile whenever I think about it because it was during those times when I have fallen for you."

His gaze softened. "Tully," he murmured, cupping her face as he looked down at her tearful eyes. It was the first time he ever addressed her using that name. She had always been Candy to him and by hearing him address her in another name, Tully felt like he was seeing her in another light.

"I promised my sister that I will find a safe place for the girls, Negan, I made that promise minutes before she died," Tully found herself telling him quietly. She reached forward and held one of his hands. "Before the outbreak, I already had a pretty shitty life. As soon as I graduated college and my Dad passed away, I was on anti-depressants and a whole ton of medication. I was depressed, I was unemployed and I locked myself in my room most of the time. My Mom, she talked to me one day and tried to put some sense back into my head and she did. I was trying to rebuild my life, I was starting to get back to the right direction when the outbreak destroyed the world and took many lives along with it," she recounted, "the girls, they were my reason to continue on. Since I can no longer rebuild my life like how I initially intended to, I've decided long ago that the only way I can do good is by being a good person and a good mother to the girls. Now I only have Molly left and I have to go on, for her. I hope you understand that. What I do, I do it because being a good mother is my way of becoming a better person. It's my way of redeeming myself."

Negan was fairly confused by her words. Why was she saying those things to him? He was left speechless when she grabbed a handful of his shirt and pulled him towards her and initiated a kiss. Her lips were soft and warm and it felt very familiar to Negan, he knew exactly what her lips felt like against his own, even the way she kissed him. He deepened the kiss and slid his tongue inside her mouth and in a matter of minutes, their clothes were scattered all over the floor. They made love that morning and somehow, everything felt perfect.

A few hours passed before the couple found themselves lying in the bed together, their naked bodies were pressed together and they fitted like two matching puzzle pieces. Tully closed her eyes as she inhaled his familiar scent. She pressed her head against his chest and listened to his heartbeat. Several minutes passed before she felt his body relax against hers.

Tully looked at his sleeping face. She watched him, teary-eyed. It killed her that the bad outweighed the good when it came to Negan. She loved him very much and she almost wished that he wasn't as bad as she knew he was. They could have a good future together if he wasn't so sinister. She knew he had a human side somewhere beneath his monstrous self and it would always appear when he was with the girls and often with her. Sometimes, she felt like she and the girls were the only ones who were able to see it out of all the people who knew Negan. She wished that his human side would overtake the monster because maybe…just maybe, she'd consider him as a fit companion. However, she also knew that it will just be an ambition for now. Right now, he was too far cannot change him. She cannot tame the monster...not if the monster refused to be tamed.

Carefully, Tully pressed a kiss on his lips before leaving the bed. She got herself dressed in silence and in the process, found Lucille on the floor. She had the opportunity to end Negan's life using his precious baseball bat right there and then. She could bash his head in with Lucille while he slept if she wanted to…but Tully didn't want that. She wanted him to live because her feelings for him were still overwhelmingly strong. Although she had to let him go, it did not mean that she had to stop loving him. She just had to distance herself and Molly from him. She left Lucille on the floor and Negan on the bed. Hastily, she took a small bottle and a syringe out of the pocket of her hoody. She returned to Negan's side a few minutes later and injected him with the substance before leaving the room, knowing she did not have much time left.

There was a reason why Tully visited Patrick that morning and helped out in the kitchen for breakfast afterwards. While handling the food, Tully contaminated it with the same medication she had injected Negan. After her disastrous attempt to escape once, she knew that she had to come up with a better plan to escape the second time around. By the time she left Negan's room, Tully was the only person in the whole entire Sanctuary who was awake. In search for Molly, she checked how successful her plan was and was glad to discover that everyone was unconscious. Even Molly herself was unconscious and Tully found her in her sister-wives' quarters.

Knowing she cannot afford to take her time, Tully picked up her unconscious daughter before gathering their things that she had packed beforehand. This time, she planned to leave the Sanctuary for good without losing another child or another limb…


	29. Chapter 29

When Negan woke up, his head felt heavy and it pounded severely as if he had fallen asleep drunk. He woke up stark naked on the bed where he remember falling asleep with Tully in his arms. However, as he got up, he noticed Tully was nowhere in sight. Before Negan could assume that she had woken up ahead of him and left the room to be with Molly, he took note of a folded piece of paper on the bed, right on the spot Tully had occupied. He reached for the piece of paper and unfolded it, revealing the long writing that was written neatly.

 **Dear Negan,**

 **By the time you read this, Molly and me are long gone. I don't have to explain why I packed Molly and my things and left. If your daughter had been nagging you for days, claiming that she does not want to live in the Sanctuary anymore, you would do the same. I also made a promise to Emily like I told you before and I need to fulfil that promise, even if I die trying. If I failed as a mother to our baby and to Carly and Jamie, then it's only right that I make everything right and make up to my mistakes by being a better mother to Molly.** **While you are reading this letter, I'm currently looking for a better home for Molly and me. Maybe we would find a community that will truly feel like a community and not a cult ran by a man who thinks that he's above everything.**

 **I always hoped that you would change. I thought that I could change you and I was wishing that the birth of our baby would help change your morals and your beliefs. I care for you so much and because of that, I wanted you so badly to change into a better person. I wanted you to abandon your ideals but I realise now that you wouldn't. You say you care for me and Molly but if you really do, you would have realised that your actions are bad and damaging. Reality is, you wanted to rebuild civilisation so badly with your morals and beliefs that you care about this and yourself more, that's why you can never change your ways. I understand though and it doesn't make me love you a little less, I still love you very much.**

 **I know you'll be looking for us and you probably want to kill me right now but we're very far away already by the time you read this letter and everyone in the Sanctuary are probably just starting to wake up. I stole a large dose of drugs from the infirmary and I slipped it on everyone's food so all your people were pretty knocked out when Molly and I left. As for you, I injected you with a small dose of the same drug. I hope no one overdosed, I did my calculations so I'm sure no one did. Anyway, I took one of your trucks, a couple of guns and a small supply of food. I hope you don't mind. I'm going to make sure the gates are locked too when we leave.**

 **Again, I'm sorry for breaking my promise that I will be with you forever. Maybe we're not meant to be together in this world and if that's the case, I want you to know that you will always be in my heart.** **The thing about motherhood is that you make sacrifices for your children and I have to do that for Molly. I'm sorry if I've hurt you by choosing Molly over you.** **If I ever broke your heart by doing what I have done, I'm sorry, I really am.**

 **Love always,**

 **Your Candy**

* * *

Frantic, desperate and berserk, Negan spent the evening on the road with his men. He dispatched groups from every corner of his territory to search for Tully and Molly. A lot of his men, including poor Patrick from the infirmary got an earful from the angry Negan who demanded to know how she managed to successfully escape. He knew she was a dangerous, unpredictable, strong-willed woman but he clearly underestimated her. Her fear made her do unimaginable things that Negan would never know she was capable of until she actually committed it.

It was the following day when the truck that Tully stole had been spotted. Negan raced to the scene but was left devastated and angrier than he was before when he saw the vehicle empty. They had clearly abandoned the vehicle and took a different one because Tully knew that he'd easily find her if she kept the truck. Negan knew that as soon as he found the truck it simply meant that Tully's trail has already gotten cold. There was a small note left on the driver's seat of the truck, written in runny black ink and addressed to Negan. Frustrated and irked, Negan left what she had left him with.

 **Dear Negan,**

 **Do you know that parenthood involves making sacrifices?**

 **If you're reading this note now then clearly you've despatched your Saviors all over the place to look for me and Molly. Please stop. We don't want to be found. You have to let us go. You claim to be Molly's father figure, if you really want to prove that you are, then you'd let your daughter go so that she could go to a place where she could have a better childhood. A good father would let his daughter go if being apart from her means that she would find happiness.**

 **Finding a safe haven for Molly is the only way I know I can undo my mistakes and redeem myself as a good mother and if you really care enough for me, you'd let me and Molly go so that I can do this for our only surviving child. I've done my part in terms of making a sacrifice as a parent by letting you go and ultimately destroying all my fantasies of us ever being together happily. It's time for you to do your part as a parent.**

 **Love always,**

 **Tully**

He cursed the woman. Although he knew she was long gone, Negan forced his men to continue searching for any sign of her and Molly. The search lasted for a whole week and he forced everyone in the Sanctuary to get involved with the search. Their mission was to find her and restlessly, they tried to under Negan's command. Every night, after every failed attempts to locate Tully and the girls, Negan would find himself sitting alone in the rooftop, watching the stars. Negan felt almost ashamed that someone could be so important to him. Without her, he felt like nothing. A part of him wished that he used Lucille to bash her head in the day they first met, when she attempted to steal from him. If he had killed her all those months ago, he wouldn't be facing such misfortune. His misfortune it seemed was her and the love spell she had trapped him under.

Behind closed doors, he reread her letters to him many, many times. In fact, he knew the letters inside out that he memorised every line. When he was not thinking about her, he'd think about Molly. He'd wonder how they were doing. Then, he would worry. He'd ask himself whether they're still alive or whether their bodies were disposed somewhere that his men cannot reach...or whether they have turned. He hated the fact that he cared so much that he would restlessly worry. When he could feel his concern for them creeping in, Negan would empty a glass of alcohol while rereading Tully's letters to him. Eventually, once he's drunk, he'd end up alone in his bed that still smelled like Tully and her darn apple shampoo. He would fall asleep surrounded by her scent, missing her warmth and cursing her for causing him such grief and misery.

The long, restless week soon came to an end and Negan had to accept the hard truth. Negan was wise enough to accept defeat and discontinue his hopeless search for Tully who had abandoned him. At the same time, he had finally absorbed the message that Tully had been trying to tell him. He had to let her and Molly go. He had to...parents make sacrifices for their children and he had to do that. Lovers make sacrifices for their other half all the time in this harsh new world and Negan had to do that. He had to let them go. Tully did her part, she made her sacrifice. He had to do his part. Besides, Negan liked to think that he was better off saving his resources too. He had wasted time and resources in his desperate attempt to locate her and Molly.

If she wanted to be found, he would find her… Although Negan hated losing, he had to let them go not only as a way of making his sacrifice to allow those he cared about to find happiness away from him but also because the prideful Negan wanted everyone to know that the woman and child he just lost meant nothing to him even if he truly cared about them more than anything. Being a leader meant being tough and faultless. To show his people that he was a tough and fit leader, Negan had to snap back to reality and show his people that he was not greatly affected by his loss. He had to get back to his old, tough self. He had to show them that the leader of the Saviors did not turned into a pussy. He started by calling off the search.

"They're probably dead," he told his people. "The bitch took a lot from us and that shit she took certainly does not belong to her. That's the only reason why I wanted her found but for all I care, she probably turned into walker food along with the little one she had dragged along with her," he claimed. "Christ! She has one fucking hand, if she got two kids and an unborn baby killed when she had both her hands then I think she didn't last very long out there with just one hand."

He wanted to show his people that loosing Tully and Molly has not affected him at all. He wanted to restore what life was like before Tully came into his life and changed it. If Tully wanted to leave and move on, so should he. He had people to keep alive, a settlement to ran and a whole lot of work to do to redeem his image to his people.

* * *

 **hey everyone,**

 **well this is it. this is technically the final chapter but i'll put up an epilogue in the next few days just to finish this story properly.**

 **anyways, i know that many of you thinks that this story turned into shit (i got messages asking for happy endings and i'm sorry that i cannot give you one)...i totally understand if you started off liking this story and eventually hating it towards the end and you're free to voice out your opinion. if you all want me to be honest, i got bored writing towards the end and i lost my motivation to write a few months ago, that's why the ending feels kinda rushed...** **until now, i still haven't opened up a word document to write and i have a bunch of unfinished stuff waiting to be finished. i keep telling myself that it's just writer's block but it's so frustrating that i cannot write more than a paragraph like how i used to. if any of you have any 'cure' for this 'disease' please help. i've had writer's block many times in the past before but this time, i'm having a really hard time overcoming it. i'd appreciate any tips too (as a christmas present)**

 **anyways, sorry that there's no happy ending, i cannot see this story having a happy ending especially when i imagine myself in tully's shoes...i mean, c'mon, if you're tully, would you choose the man you love or the child you love?**

 **well, it's been a wild and fun ride writing for you all and hopefully next year i'll come up with something new just in time for the premier of the rest of season 7. i'm crossing my fingers that i'll be able to write again or at least finish my unfinished stories**

 **anyway, stay tuned for the epilogue! :)**


	30. Chapter 30

**hello everyone!**

 **this is it...the EPILOGUE :( the epilogue was one of the first things i've written when i started writing this story and a lot of you have predicted the way this story will end before so here it is...**

 **sorry it's short but hey, it's more optimistic than last chapter :)**

* * *

A dusty small car was parked in the middle of the abandoned town square. The town square was eerily quiet and almost deserted. Two loitering walkers took notice of the vehicle and they trudged towards it, moaning and growling as they dragged their bony feet towards it. The stench of rotting flesh radiated from them. They were bony and they were very hungry. The door of the driver's side opened and a tall man with tousled and greasy hair stepped out of the car. He approached the walkers and easily ended the misery of the creatures by piercing his knife through their heads. The passenger door opened and another man stepped out, this one had a much more longer, untamed and greasier hair than the other one. He wore a distinct leather vest and held a crossbow in his hands.

"Rick," the crossbow wielding man called his companion. "Let's go."

They began the long meticulous task that involved cautiously entering each abandoned shop in search for supplies. During the course of ten minutes, they have entered five different shops and stumbled upon a handful of walkers but there was no sign of anything they could take for themselves. The man with the crossbow started to get impatient.

"We ain't gonna find anything in this area. We should go," he told his companion named Rick.

Rick seemed unconvinced. Unlike his companion, he was a little more patient. "Let's go to the pharmacy over there," Rick nodded his head at the small store located across the road from where they stood. "We might find something for Denise."

They crossed the road where there was a white delivery truck parked in front of the pharmacy. As they neared the truck, a figure stepped out of its hiding spot. It was a girl with bright red hair, no older than eight, who stepped out of the spot where she had been hiding near the pharmacy's entrance

"What do you want?" demanded the girl that stunned both men. Both men exchanged looks before they glanced back at the little girl pointing a gun at them.

"Hey, it's okay," the man named Rick spoke calmly, "we're not going to hurt you." Despite his assurance, the little girl seemed unconvinced.

"Mommy!" she shouted over her shoulder, "there are strange men out here!" She narrowed her eyes as she glared at both men

Both men exchanged looks after realising that the girl wasn't alone. "What's your name little girl?" Rick continued to ask calmly.

"Molly."

Rick nodded his head in acknowledgement. "I'm Rick and my friend here is Daryl. Will you lower your gun, please?" although hesitant, Molly followed his request. "Will you take us to your mother?"

The rather cautious Molly eventually caved in and led both men inside the pharmacy. They were greeted by the woman whom they assumed was the girl's mother. Clearly, she had been expecting them after Molly's earlier warning, she had her gun pointed at Daryl's head with her finger on the trigger.

"Who are you?" she demanded as she stepped forward, motioning for Molly to stand behind her and away from the strangers grasp while she continued to point her gun at Daryl.

"We mean you and your girl no harm," Rick assured her. His voice was calm and soft. One thing Daryl and Rick could agree on was that the woman and her child have no permanent place to live in judging by their grubby clothes. Seeing that Rick was not pointing his weapons at her, she lowered her gun. "My name's Rick and this is Daryl," continued Rick, looking relieved now that she wasn't threatening Daryl's life. However, Daryl still seemed unimpressed, especially since the woman just threatened him with her gun.

It was clear that she was very wary of their presence. "If this is your territory, we don't mean to invade. I just need to get some medicine for this," she said, pointing at what was left of her bandaged arm, "we'll be on our way," she told them. It was clear that she was making sure she was staying out of trouble.

Rick and Daryl exchanged looks. "Now if you don't mind me asking, how many walkers have you killed?" Rick asked her. His question seemed to surprise her. It was very random.

"I don't know," she chuckled dryly. "Do people still count it nowadays. Look, we'll be on our way."

Rick persisted. "How many people have you killed?" he continued to ask. This particular question surprised her even more. She looked at Rick who was looking back at her expectantly, awaiting her response. She looked at Molly then back to the strangers before her.

"A few."

"Why?" Rick asked.

"Because they're a threat and she's my priority," she replied simply as she nodded at Molly. Rick and Daryl seemed satisfied with her response.

"We have a place," Rick informed her, "we live in a small community and we have a doctor. Maybe she can have a look at your injury." The woman seemed very hesitant. It was as if she didn't know whether to trust his words or not. "You and Molly will be safe there, I swear. There are families in the community, children too."

She looked at Molly once more then back to Rick. "Okay," she replied. With that one simple answer, Rick and Daryl took her and Molly to the said community named Alexandria Safe Zone.

* * *

 **well, i'll end the story here everyone, sorry that it's short but i hope you all enjoyed the final chapter of this story. i had fun writing it and all your lovely reviews kept me motivated most of the time so thank you so much.**

 **also, speaking of reviews, i wanna say a BIG thank you to everyone who reviewed after last chapter. i appreciate all of the writing advice that you guys gave me and also all the amazing feedback. one of the reason that i can never stop writing fanfiction is because of you lovely people, you guys are motivating and inspiring :)**

 **i hope that i'll be back next year just in time for the second half of Season 7 with some new stories to share with you all...atm i have an unfinished Daryl Dixon fanfic and several unfinished Negan fanfics...i hope that i'll be able to write again soon and overcome this writer's block so i'll have something for you guys soon**

 **for now, feel free to check out my other fanfics that might interest you all**

 **and again, thank you :)**


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